Okay, don't even ask me WHAT I was on or lacking (my mind? hmmm..) when I wrote this. Insanity follows. aargh. Oh, and yes, the title does have two meanings, if you get what I mean... :D Insanity!!
So what do we have here then? An aging ex-suzaku seven who tried to kill me several times destroyed most of my soldiers, stopped me from becoming a god and in the end killed me. Unsuccessfully. Yes Tamahome, well done, its taken you long enough to realise. I'M NOT DEAD. And you know why that is? Because your wife brought me back to life. Oh spare me the dramatics don't look so surprised you always knew she had a thing for me. Otherwise she'd have never come to me that night. Yes, I am perfectly aware that it was me that tricked her into thinking that if she slept with me that she'd win but the facts remain, she came. Wasn't bad either.
Ok, so you know that we never slept together, well whatever, she still brought me back to life, that's got to count for something. But that's not why were here, is it Tamahome? Don't look at me like that its not my fault you.. well.. let yourself go a bit. Can't say I blame you though, all those long haired boys in soldiers outfits.. that Nuriko really was something. Shame I killed him really. But again, reminiscing about that good old days isn't why were here. Oh, by the way you did find your family didn't you? I never liked pointless murders, now don't start trying to kill me again, remember while you're here you have to obey me. Now, its quite simple, you'll be here for four weeks on a tight training schedule while we subtly try to break your mind. At the end of every week you'll have a chance to tell us how much you feel you've improve and at the end well have an awards assembly where each person has a fully public confession. Friends and relatives welcome. You're uniform's over there, Amiboshi will send you to your cabin and dinner's at seven. Oh, and the first thing we need is a signature to say that you accept why you're here.. If you could just sign on the dotted line under where it says that you've come here because you're in denial.. lovely. I guarantee in a month you wont be able to recognise yourself… possibly because you'll be in women's clothes, but that's just a plus. I'll make a fruitcake of you yet Tamahome. Oh, and you might want to think about regrowing your hair while you're here. I was so upset when it was hacked off.. Lights out is at nine, don't fret I'll come and check on you to make sure you're tucked in, but don't tell the others or they might get jealous. Oh, and Tamahome? When you write to Miaka will you please ask her NEVER to wear pink again? It clashed with her hair terribly… anyway, thank you darling. NEXT.