Disclaimer: I do not own Coneheads
"Connie I read in a magazine that you can talk to me about anything," my mother said stroking my bald cone softly.
"It's weird," I said, "But sometimes I feel like I don't fit in."
Mom kissed my cone.
"Oh young one," she said, "You are growing and changing. You don't fit in. You are yourself. You are a beautiful strong and kind young lady. You're Connie Conehead and you should be proud to be yourself. I know one thing. I'm proud that you are my Cone."
I sniffled.
"Thanks mom," I said, "I love you. It just is so hard sometimes not to fit in.
"I know my young one. I was once a young cone myself. I would have bad days myself sometimes and it would make me feel FLINGITY"
"Flingity?"
"FLINGITY... like crying"
"So how did you handle it," I asked.
"Sometimes I would talk with my parental units. Sometimes I would talk to my friends. Sometimes I would write my thoughts in my Krindoblab"
"Krindoblab?"
"Yes. It is a diary. It is a place where you write down your thoughts. I have my old krindoblab here."
She handed it to me.
"This should help you young one," she said
Finally I smiled again. I knew one of those days I would fit into the world I lived in. I knew I was loved. My parental units have I realized been affectionate because that is the way that love and affection is shown on the planet they came from. I told my mom about Ronnie.
"Ronnie is a FLINDIB," she said, "He does not know his DISEP from his BUMPKINHOLE"
"Huh," I asked confused.
"DISEP is a brain. BUMPKINHOLE is where you make waste."
I laughed. I don't know exactly what happened next but mom kissed me goodnight and I fell asleep. I felt bad but at the same time good like the bad feeling fading away at the and of a day. I know that it would be alright. I knew that I was safe and loved and that's all I needed.