A/N: We hate Evan, I hate Evan, you hate Evan, I do not own the 39 Clues.
Deep in the night
I sit down to write
A poem that will win a prize
Well, that would be quite nice.
Find myself surfing the net
Distracted again, I bet.
Photoshop Jake's head onto a mouse
Plan a siege on Evan's house.
KURT DID WHAT? He's gonna pay,
Cause if he's dead it'll make my day.
Left for a couple hours
Returned with a bunch of flowers
I stole when I sieged Evan's house
And strangled him with Natalie's favourite blouse.
Wrote a love letter, signed Ian.
It's but part of my awesome plan.
Left the letter on Amy's doorstep
Stabbed Kurt with a pair of forceps.
Taught Dan to eat with a fork
Hey, all in a day's work!
Went back to my poem
Hey, what even rhymes with "poem"?
Why do poems even have to rhyme?
My gosh, what an epic waste of time.
I should stop reading Amian
But then I will go read Natan.
So what's the point?
Wait… I can go break Jake's shoulder joint!
Place Dan's ninja suit in lots of glitter
Surf Facebook, Friendster and Twitter.
But I'm not a quitter
So though Evan (BASHING) gives me the jitters
So decked out in mauve,
I dance upon Evan's grave.
Then I sit down to write my poem, again
MY GOSH RICK RIORDAN JUST TWEETED
So I guess my poem ends here
Once and for all
Cause I'm going shopping at the mall.
A/N: Hope you all Evamy haters enjoyed that