Partners
Written by:
Sylvester Tennant
[The Googolplex Mall-Candace and Stacy walk through the mall amidst signs that advertise many sales.]
Stacy: Wow, look at it all. I don't know where to start. When Jenny gets here, we have to hit the ground running if we want to get in on everything.
Candace: What's really great, my brothers aren't doing any project today.
[At the food court, Candace and Stacy buy three drinks and sit.]
Stacy: I hope Jenny likes banana-lime cream-freezes.
Candace: Oh, I think that… (she trails off) Wait a minute. What're they up to?
[Candace points and Stacy looks to see Phineas and Ferb with a sack and a list. Phineas puts an item in the sack as Ferb scribbles on the list.]
Stacy: Hmm, looks like they've got a list and gathering things.
Candace: (gasps) Those little twerps! They lied to me! Ooh, they so going to get so busted.
[Candace stands, but is stopped when Stacy grabs her arm.]
Stacy: Candace...
Candace: Stacy, they lied right to my face. That alone isn't right. Come on.
[Candace starts off and Stacy sighs and grabs the drinks before following her friend.]
Stacy: Can't you just, I don't know, blow off wanting to bust your brothers?
[Candace scoffs.]
Candace: Blow it off? Sure, I'll just blow it off. Ooh, but why stop there? Maybe I'll just blow off walking. (stops) Oh, maybe I'll just blow off standing. (drops to the ground) Hey, maybe I'll just blow off not wriggling about like a fish on dry land. (wriggles about)
[Stacy facepalms as Candace carries on.]
Candace: (stands back up) What do you have to say about that?
[Stacy looks up.]
Stacy: About twenty people totally saw your underwear just now.
[Candace then notices the crowd that has gathered around. She blushes feverishly. A little girl with her mother points at Candace.]
Candace: Grr, this is Phineas and Ferb's fault. Come on. (grabs Stacy)
[Candace and Stacy continue to follow the boys and they run into Jenny.]
Candace: Jenny, good. We've got busting to do.
Stacy: Hi, Jenny. (hands her the drink) Here, a banana-lime cream-freeze.
Jenny: Wait, what...?
Stacy: Candace. Brothers. Busting. Same old thing.
[Jenny groans and gulps down her drink. The girls then start after the boys.]
[Meanwhile, Phineas and Ferb are engaged in a conversation.]
Phineas: Yeah, you're right, Ferb. Chili and cheese doesn't make every food better. Hey, where's Perry?
[Perry's Lair-Perry descends in the elevator and rushes to his seat.]
Major Monogram: Agent P, Dr. Doofenshmirtz is up to another of his schemes. He's planning something that has to do with a visit of one of his brother's closest friend. Also, given revised O.W.C.A. Procedures, every agent must complete at least one mission accompanied by a rookie agent.
[Another chair circles around and a fedora wearing green, yellow, and red bird is now seen.]
Major Monogram: Say hello to Xander the Xantus' Hummingbird, or Agent X. Yes, we finally got an Agent X. Now, while he's a rookie agent, I know you'll the prime agent to show him the ropes.
[While Xander looks eager, Perry looks at him questioningly.]
[The Flynn-Fletcher Home-Phineas and Ferb arrive and enter the garage. Candace, Stacy, and Jenny are not far behind, as they slowly creep along the wall.]
Stacy: Why are we doing this?
Candace:
[She suddenly stops, resulting in Stacy and Jenny bumping into her.]
Candace: Hold it. If we're gonna track them, we've gotta do it right. I'll be right back.
[Candace dashes off and Stacy and Jenny lean back against the wall.]
Stacy: I'm having a flashback here. You remember the time Candace somehow got her face stuck in that sink?
Jenny: Yes, Yes, I do.
[Flashback-Candace is shown with her head caught in a sink. She struggles to free herself as Stacy and Jenny look in disbelief at her predicament.]
Candace: Hey! Hey, I'm stuck! Help me!
Jenny: How…did this happen?
Stacy: I cannot even guess…
[Present Day]
Candace: I got these.
Stacy: Candace, these again?
Candace: What? Come on, we're wasting time.
Jenny: She'll keep asking until we do it, so we might as well.
[There is a quick cut as Candace, Stacy, and Jenny are now dressed in the jumpsuits they wore in "Phineas and Ferb Busters".]
Jenny: I still don't like persimmon.
Stacy: And I'm still not into tangerine.
Jenny: And these fit more tightly than last time.
Candace: Yeah, I think I used the wrong detergent on these. (she sees the boys heading out) The bust is on.
[Doofenshmirtz's Building]
Chorus: Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated!
[Perry and Xander enter the building and sneak into Doofenshmirtz's home. Xander is eager to make a move, but Perry stops him. Perry motions for Xander to stay out of sight and out of his way. Xander frowns in disappointment, but does what he's told.]
[Perry steps out, but triggers a trap which shuts him in a bird cage, followed by a larger pet carrier, and then inside a large metal cage.]
Doofenshmirtz: Perry the Platypus, how polite of you to step into my trap.
Doofenshmirtz: I received miserable news. Barnard Paulus, one of Roger's closest friends back in Gimmelshtump, is coming for a visit. Why I don't like him is simple, every time I've seen him, he's always given me a wedgie. No matter what, a wedgie every time.
[Cut to Doofenshmirtz's childhood home.]
Doofenshmirtz: When I tried to eat.
[Young Doofenshmirtz is about to eat a plate of schnitzel when another boy, Barnard, jumps into the shot and gives him a wedgie. As Young Doofenshmirtz winces, Barnard cackles.]
[Cut to ramshackle barn.]
Doofensmirtz: My senior prom.
[A teenage Doofenshmirtz dances with his date when Barnard jumps into the shot and gives him a wedgie.]
Doofenshmirtz: When Vanessa was born.
[Cut to a hospital room where Charlene lies in bed, newborn Vanessa in her arms, and Doofenshmirtz standing next to the bed. Barnard jumps in the shot and gives Doofenshmirtz a wedgie.]
Doofenshmirtz: Which is why I've created the Wedgie-inator! With this I will get the jump on Barnard. He'll soon be arriving with Roger, and when he does, he'll get the mother of all wedgies! And of course, if it works out, I'll use it on everyone else in the Tri-State Area. And there's nothing you can do about it. I've put the release button all the way up there.
[He points to a box mounted on a high shelf, the only opening is a pea sized hole. Xander takes notice and slowly starts to sneak around and towards the shelf.]
[Danville Street-Candace, Stacy, and Jenny creep along as they continue to follow Phineas and Ferb. When the boys stop, so do they. It is then Jenny fidgets uncomfortably.]
Jenny: Okay, this is really riding up now.
[Stacy takes a look.]
Stacy: Yes, yes it is.
Candace: Girls, focus!
[Jenny adjusts her jumpsuit as she and Stacy follow Candace. The girls then see Phineas and Ferb hold up several items before putting them in the sack.]
Candace: Now what can they do with a rope, a candlestick, and a wrench?
Stacy: I haven't a clue.
[The boys then head down an alleyway.]
Candace: They went down the alley. After them.
[The girls lightly trend into the alley. They look about for any sign of the boys. Suddenly there is a low rustle and a trashcan rattles.]
Candace: Shh. Did you hear that?
[The girls take slow steps, when a cat jumps out, yowling. They jump startled, but laugh it off.]
Jenny: It was only a cat.
[They take another two steps, when the same cat jumps out yowling again. The girls jump and flinch.]
Stacy: Holy cow!
[They take another two steps, when the cat jumps out yowling once more. The girls scream.]
Stacy: What is that cat's deal?
Jenny: Is somebody throwing it?
Candace: Whatever, keep moving.
[They take another two steps, when the cat jumps out yowling yet again. The girls nearly lose it this time.]
Stacy: Can we please hold off on the "keep moving"?
Candace: What do you mean?
Stacy: Um, psycho cat on the loose in here!
Jenny: Yeah, I love animals, but that cat is just evil!
Candace: So are my brothers.
[They reach the end of the alley and see the boys off in the distance.]
Candace: There they are! Let's go!
[The girls dash off, Jenny struggling to keep up while adjusting her jumpsuit again.]
[At D.E. Inc., an alarm suddenly sounds. Fearing he's been spotted, Xander ducks behind a vase.]
Doofenshmirtz: Aha, the proximity alert. That means my brother's limo is arriving and Barnard is with him. Now to aim the Wedgie-inator.
[Doofenshmirtz turns his back and Xander sneaks over to the shelf and flies up to the box which contains the release button. He peeks inside and sees the button. Unsure of how to get at it, he suddenly beams with realization. He sticks his thin beak into the opening and reaches the button, pressing it. As he does, the trap Perry is in disassembles.]
Doofenshmirtz: Perry the Platypus, how'd you escape?
[Xander flutters over and Perry smiles proudly.]
Doofenshmirtz: (gasp) You had a mystery partner this whole time?
[Perry lunges, knocking Doofenshmirtz back and into the Wedgie-inator, pivoting it off target. The Wedgie-inator fires, the beam streaking across the sky. Xander darts forward, searching about until he finds the self-destruct button. He presses it and the Wedgie-inator glows before dissolving.]
[At the entrance to the park, Candace and her friends see the boys, but then Candace notices that both Linda and Lawrence are nearby]
Candace: (gasps) Mom and Dad are here. Perfect! Girls, you wait here.
[Candace hurries off and Stacy and Jenny stand by. Jenny is suddenly hit by the beam from the Wedgie-inator. There is a loud CREAK sound and her face contorts and her eyes water.]
Jenny: YOOOOOWWWW! OH-OH-OH!
[Stacy jumps in surprise.]
Stacy: Jenny, Jenny, what happened?
[Jenny grasps her behind.]
Jenny: I just got the mother of all wedgies just now, that's what happened. Oh, it hurts.
Stacy: Here, let me take a look. (pause) Ooh…
Jenny: Tell me the truth. How bad is it?
Stacy: Oh, you'll be fine. (whispers) Hopefully.
[Back at Doofenshmirtz Evil Inc., Doofenshmirtz shakes his fist.]
Doofenshmirtz: Curse you, Perry the Platypus and mystery partner!
[Perry and Xander leap off the building and Perry deploys his parachute. As he drifsts down, his communicator beeps.]
Monogram: Excellent work, Agents P and X. That was a superb display. Agent X, you'll soon be assigned a villain of your own. And Agent P, kudos to showing the rookie the ropes.
[Perry nods respectfully to Xander.]
[Meanwhile, Doofenshmirtz cringes as there comes a knock at the door. He goes to answer and Roger and Barnard step inside.]
Roger: Heinz, look who's here.
Doofenshmirtz: (sighs) Hello, Barnard. Let's get this over with.
[He closes his eyes, bracing for the wedgie. However, Barnard reaches out and gives him a hug.]
Barnard: I'm sorry, Heinz, for all those times.
Doofenshmirtz: Okay, awkward hug. I think I'd prefer the wedgie.
[Back at the park, Linda and Lawrence stand as Candace rushes over to them.]
Linda: Hi, Candace, wearing the jumpsuit again, I see.
Candace: Mom, Dad, come with me!
[Candace drags her parents over to where she last saw the boys and finds them. She giggles mischievously as they reach them. And then Jenny, with help from Stacy, gingerly walks over and the two join the group.]
Candace: Okay, where is it?
Phineas: Where's what?
Candace: Your project. Fess up, where is it? (looks around)
Phineas: We didn't build anything, Candace.
Candace: Oh, don't try and give me that. We've followed you and saw you get the parts.
Phineas: Those weren't parts, Candace. Everything was for today's scavenger hunt.
[Ferb holds up a list and shows that items that have been crossed off.]
[Candace's jaw drops, as does Stacy and Jenny's.]
Candace: A scavenger hunt? That's all it was?
Phineas: Yeah, don't tell me you three spent the day following us.
[Candace makes a similar face to the one in "I, Brobot" when she says, "They're brobots".]
Candace: Hamina, hamina, hamina, hamina…
Ferb: Are you all right, Candace?
[Candace, Stacy, and Jenny all faint.]
Linda: Boys, let's get them home.
[Just then, Perry scurries over and chatters.]
Lawrence: Oh, there you are, Perry.