UNFORGETTABLE

Ever since His Last Vow aired I've always had the part where Sherlock is talking with Moriarty in his mind palace in my head. Specifically "You never felt pain, did you? Why did you never feel pain?"

I've wanted to do something with that and I guess I've sort of known what that should be but never felt ready to do. Now I am. So here it is.

Molly would look up from her notes about the next speech she had to give every second Sherlock started mumbling. It wasn't the best sleeper. Always tossing and turning. For a little while she thought he could have went into his mind palace. She had seen him moving out and mutter incoherent phrases before. It was a part of his process.

For the past two hours his fragmented thoughts were the same. He kept repeating the same thing over and over again. Pain. Why did you never feel pain?

Ordinarily she would let him be. Let him go through the motions of his thoughts and dreams but there was something about Sherlock Holmes distress that made her reach out and place her fingers around his wrist. She wasn't checking his pulse but it was the quickest avenue for her to get his attention. To wake him up.

He jostled. A deep breath being swept in and out as his wide eyes found hers. He briefly looked at her hand as she withdrew it. "Molly.." He sounded out of it. She knew that he was.

This was the second time he had been in the hospital for a gun shot wound. He was impossible. He was reckless, and in part that was why she cared for him. She had a pocket in her heart for damaged things. She had known quite early on that Sherlock was broken. She wasn't trying to fix him, but she sought to aid him if she could.

"What are you doing here?" He breathed once he had settled once more.

"I work here." She paused as she closed her notebook. He eyed it with minimal curiosity. "Someone has to look after you who is a doctor. Someone who can stick around and not get pushed out." She decided not to tell him that she may have thrown her rank (however minimal it was) to make sure that she could sit in here. Mycroft had wanted to do something. She was in a mood so her response of 'you've done enough' wasn't the best.

Molly was good at taking care of herself. She could handle it. She did.

Sherlock looked uncomfortable for the barest of moments. "I'm fine, Molly." He cleared his throat.

"Everyone feels pain, Sherlock. Even the most cold seeming people. You were question the idea that someone didn't feel pain when you were sleeping. Made you quite distressed."

"Even Moriarty or Jim as you liked to call him?" He gave her a half hearted smirk. He knew he couldn't hold that over her forever. Jim was a liar. She was surrounded by liars.

"Even him. It takes a man who thinks he deserves the world to know the true essence of pain." She continued.

Sherlock tried to sit up. He groaned. He was still hurting. A second or third death experience would do that to a man.

Molly reached out and plucked up the small remote that was next to Sherlock she pressed the button to lift the bed into sitting up position. He gave her a smile. "How do you figure, Doctor? He treated life as if it was all a game. Even shooting himself to prove that he didn't care."

Molly always found the most inopportune times to find something funny. She let out a short laugh. Sherlock gave her a look. Don't do that. She kept smiling. "It was a game to him. Still is perhaps, in the afterlife. If that's what's plaguing you. He's still here. With you. In your head."

Sherlock looked away from her. How could she know all of that from just sitting there? When she decide to be the one to pick him apart? That's what he did.

He swallowed as he shifted his head back over to her. She was still staring at him. No mirth in her eyes. She looked contemplative about something. He decided to bring her out of it. "You're there too. Like now. Guiding me. He didn't notice."

She waited. He had more he wanted to tell her.

She was surprised to know that she was in his mind. She tried to do so many things for him. The idea that she has done enough to earn a place means more than she'll ever say.

"He mentioned Mrs. Hudson, Mummy, Dad, The Woman," He paused looking at the steady gaze he gave her. It didn't bother her anymore. "John, and Mary. He's forgotten or at least it seems that way. You're unforgettable. Maybe it's the drugs, ha, no, it's me feeling things. Do you understand what I'm trying to say?"

Molly bites her lip, looks down at her hands before flicking her gaze back up to him. "I could never forget you either. It's why I'm so annoyed with you."

"Oh?" He sighed.

"You're an idiot. A very smart idiot who only has the best intentions but it's going to get you killed and that's the kind of pain I can't handle."

He reaches out for her hand. She let's him take it. "Are you leaving?"

She could see the pain in his eyes. He didn't want her to leave. It wasn't just this city. He feared she'd leave him.

She shook her head with a watery smile. "I couldn't leave. You kinda need me, don't you?" It's more of a whisper but he hears it.

He laughs. It's short and painful but he agrees with her.

"I'll always need you." He told her quietly. It caused his voice to come out deeper and low. He watched her eyes dilate just the smallest bit. He smiled. He had nearly misplaced the note about her enjoying his voice. He let it go. It wasn't the time for that.

He felt her apply pressure to his hand. It was a silent okay.

This in no way changed the fact that he would still need to win her trust but it got them somewhere. A stepping off point.

It only hurt him a little knowing the road would be longer with what he was about to do next.

-x-

He rushed into the lab. Nearly toppling over an intern who was on her way out. Her eyes widen but swiftly moved out the way when she realized who he was and the fact that he appeared to be in a hurry.

He found Molly turned away, looking at a file in her hands. "Molly." He called.

He watched her shut the file before swiftly spinning around. Her face was expectant. He supposed she had seen the footage. He stepped towards her. Hands at his side in case she didn't want him to touch her. He understood why.

"What do you need?" She was calm. The same type of calm she had the first time she asked the question. The same variation that she carried in the hospital with him. He would kiss her if he wasn't sure that the others weren't right behind him. Or that she would push him away. He had to build up that trust again.

He had killed someone - she would have accepted why - and then been sent to his death. He had come back without even telling her goodbye. She would have been told. The shock of this new threat (or old threat) could have muddled her thoughts about him. There was almost always a contradiction about him. She would have learned that. In spite of that she was standing there looking as fierce as ever.

He smiled. "You."

It's always you.

*mops up tears* I wasn't expecting to write all of that but I'm happy I did? Hopefully you guys liked it too. Let me know, please.

much love,

day