I guess it all started when I was young, but not really so...
What happens when you mix peanut butter with chickens?
Heed what I write mortal, if not you may find yourself being hung from your entrails.
When I was a lad I was mortal, a lot like yourself infact. No... Not like you but a lot like you... maybe. I don't really know. Or care infact.
I lived with my mother and a man friend of hers, my father had been eaten by an ogre when he had gone off looking for adventure. Mother said it was his midlife crisis or something. I like crisis, don't you? It adds a certain zip to life.
What happens when a Daedroth gets a tooth ache? Dose he got to a Daemora dentist?
Mother was always with her man friend, they did things I wasn't supposed to know about. But I knew... I always knew. I know things...
I know that bats can be rats.
I know rags can be riches.
I know I have power
I am the Madgod, Sheogorath, Master of the mind, the Bringer of Creativity, and this is my tale.
The Tale of how I came to rule these fine Shivering Isles.
Why do they shiver? I did not make them cold.