Author's Note: I hope everyone enjoys this story! I am new to the Legend of the Seeker series, but hope this story does the series justice. For the people who know my writing style, you already know what to expect. :) As for the other readers... let's just say my writing tends to walk on the dark side.
The night was perfect. The moon was full and there were no clouds to mar the beautiful star-filled sky. It had been several days since the last band of banelings had tried to attack them, but Kahlan still felt anxious.
The night was too quiet though, not a sound was to be heard save for the low crackling of the camp fire and the soft but steady sound of steel on whetstone as Richard honed the edges of the Sword of Truth. Normally, a night like this would fill the Mother Confessor with peace and hope; but the thoughts, that have been running through her mind as of late, have stolen the serenity from her and caused apprehension to ravage her heart and mind.
It all started a few weeks ago, these thoughts of misgivings about her feelings for the Seeker. At first, Kahlan thought they were just last minute jitters that one would feel right before turning a friendship into an actual relationship. The Confessor knew that hesitations like these were well-founded, especially since she could lose control of her powers in a moment of unbridled passion and confess Richard, causing him to become her thrall; but as the days went by, she realised that it was more than that. She barely tolerated the kisses and embraces he would bestow upon her and the looks he would cast her way when she glanced in his direction would cause the bile to rise in the back of her throat. Were her feelings towards the man magnified because he was the first person to treat her as if she was a regular person? Was it ever really love in the first place? Or was it just the need for being treated equal that caused her to read more into her emotions?
After all, ever since she was born, she was treated differently than the other children in the town that she grew up in. And when Denee was born, her sister soon followed her down the lonely path that was their childhood. The others regarded the two sisters with fear that was ill-covered with respect, but Kahlan also saw the looks of disgust for what they were. She knew those feelings that the townspeople felt for them were well placed, especially since her father forced them to confess others to his will after her mother died. Oh, how she longed for the day that they could leave her father's presence and that of the townsfolk. That day came soon enough. Riders from Aydindril came in search of her mother, but only found a grave and the two young girls. Escorting the two back to Aydindril was easy. They gladly left the home of their father and the fearful glares of the townspeople; but even in Aydindril, the home to all Confessors, Kahlan and Denee were treated differently. As children of the Mother Confessor, their lives were much different than that of the other children of Confessors and as the eldest, Kahlan's was filled with days and days of training to take up the mantle of her mother.
For nearly fifteen years, she trained and studied and was treated with the utmost respect that came with her role as the new Mother Confessor, but behind the respect was still the treatment she had before in the town that her father lived, the cold and distant fear of being different from the rest. But she endured it all. All of the slights she took inward, only to allow them to escape when night fell and she was left alone in her quarters. It wasn't until she met Richard that she realised that actual happiness and friendship could be found in the world.
But it was this happiness and friendship with Richard that has now muddled her senses. How could she had thought that her feelings were more than that of friendship with this man? How could her mind so readily accept such a match between her and Richard? Shaking her head as she feels the worry and anticipation of an argument ready to happen, Kahlan slowly walks towards the camp fire and sits down on a log opposite of the fire from Richard.
Sensing that someone else was nearby, the Seeker puts down the whetstone and sword and smiles at Kahlan, "Beautiful night, isn't it?"
"Very," she says quietly as she stares at the flickering flames in front of her. Her mind focused on recent events' past than Richard's actual words. A chill runs down her spine as thoughts of piercing green eyes and a playful smirk cross her mind.
"Kahlan, you are cold," the Seeker states as he notices the Confessor shiver. He walks towards her and sits beside her, wrapping his arms around her after he is comfortable.
"No, I am fine Richard," Kahlan tries to pull away from him without upsetting him, "I was just thinking about the past few days." She stares at him and tries to smile, but it doesn't reach her eyes.
Smirking to himself, the Seeker nods his head, "Yeah, these past few days have been pretty interesting. Especially the day of my birthday surprise."
Nodding her head slowly, Kahlan's thoughts were transported to that fateful day that almost cost her her life and the life of the person who has slowly etched their way into her heart. With a faint smile on her face, the Mother Confessor thinks back on that day with a mixture of pain and happiness. It was a day that she would remember for the rest of her life as the day that she nearly died but also as the day that she finally found her reason to carry on in life.
The air was getting thin and Kahlan struggles just to keep her focus on inhaling and exhaling. The sounds of Cara next to her gasping for the same limited air supply keeps her from passing on into the next realm. "Please... stay with me, Cara," Kahlan gasps as she grasps the blonde's hand.
"Just let me die, Kahlan," Cara states as she fights for air. "If I die, it means you can live on."
"No! We will both make it, I promise. Just hold on, Cara," Kahlan says as her eyes roll toward the back of her head. 'I was talking too much...' she thinks as she grips the Mord'Sith's hand tighter. 'Too much talking, not enough air.' She feels the Mord'Sith grip her hand just as fiercely as she had and it causes a small smile to form on her lips.
"If this is the last thing I ever say to you, Kahlan, then so be it..." Cara starts as she tries to move closer to the Confessor.
"Cara, don't..." Kahlan begins, but the pain of limited air cuts through her chest like a knife.
"Please... just let me speak." Cara says stubbornly as she tries to gain enough oxygen to continue. "Before I met you, I never knew I could feel what I feel for anyone, much less a person I was trained to hate. But I don't hate you, Kahlan Amnell, I don't hate you at all."
Kahlan struggles to look at the Mord'Sith beside her and is astonished to see the amount of love and tenderness that the blonde conveyed towards her in one brief moment. She opens her mouth to say something, anything to Cara, but at that moment the torch-light finally flickers out and Kahlan realises that now the air has completely ran out of the tomb. Tomb... the word echoes in her mind as she finally comes to terms with what the room actually is. Not someone else's tomb, their tomb. Her's and Cara's. A place where they will spend eternity. An eternity never able to fulfil all the possibilities that ran through Kahlan's mind the exact moment she realised how much she cared for the woman who she was trapped in the same room with.
She feels Cara's hand loosening its grip on hers and she tries vainly to renew the connection between them, but it is so hard to keep focus when all she feels is numbness in her extremities. Kahlan wants to say something to the blonde, anything to keep the blonde from dying but when she opens her mouth all she can do is gasp as her lungs vainly attempt to search the atmos for life-sustaining oxygen. Kahlan feels the world grow darker and that the pain she had felt only seconds before seemed to lessen dramatically. She feels her eyes close as her body begins to, almost imperceptibly, shut down. Suddenly a rush of air and a blinding light causes her body to act on its own accord. Her lungs greedily drink in the cool crisp morning air as her eyes blink back the light. The Confessor grips the Mord'Sith's hand with renewed strength and she is relieved that she feels the same pressure reciprocated.
Kahlan smiles sadly at the memory as she stares into the flames. After that day, neither women had spoke about the incident. The Confessor hoped that maybe Cara was just a little nervous about what she had announced, but, more than likely, the blonde was just caught up in the moment and did not want the brunette to die feeling as though she was alone.
Suddenly, the brush near the camp-fire moves causing both the Confessor and the Seeker to stand up with their weapons in hand. Richard places himself in front of Kahlan, which causes her to roll her eyes at his bravado. Kahlan glances over his shoulder and feels relief flood her being when she sees Cara come through the bushes. The Mord'Sith quirks an eyebrow at the couple in front of her as she notices their weapons were poised for battle. "Something I miss?" She asks as she moves towards the fire to place the brace of hares she had recently caught on a boulder. "If no one protests, I am going to take a bath in this warm spring I found close to our encampment. I guess that leaves you with skinning duty, Richard," she states as she walks back towards the forest. "Before I go," she turns back to look through the bush she had just stepped behind. "The wizard didn't come through this way did he? I know he was looking for some root or another."
"He had went in the other direction," Richard says as he tries to stifle a chuckle.
The Mord'Sith nods her head slightly. "Good, I do not wish to have to kill him if he walks near the spring while I bathe."
Richard chuckles at the blonde and moves back towards the fire. "Maybe you should join her, Kahlan." The Confessor turns to look at the Seeker in astonishment, but luckily his back was turned towards Cara's catch. 'Does he know what happened between us in the tomb?' Kahlan opens her mouth to speak, but the Seeker speaks first. "You have been distracted lately. I know our travels have given you cause to be so, but I feel that maybe if you allowed yourself to relax a bit more, maybe it would allow you to focus. And a warm spring sounds like the perfect place to unwind. Plus, I don't want you to go by yourself... it is too dangerous for you to travel alone."
She opens her mouth to protest, but instantly closes it. 'After all this time, he still thinks I can not take care of myself.' She rolls her eyes, a trait she had picked up from the Mord'Sith, and walks into the woods where she had last seen the blonde. 'I can't believe it...' she thinks to herself as she picks her way past brambles and fallen logs. 'He still thinks I am some weak woman who needs his help every time I turn around. I don't know which one is worse, him or the Home Guard back in Aydindril. Just once in my life, I wish that someone would not feel the need to constantly protect me from everything. He has this way of making me feel as though danger is lurking behind every...'
A hand shoots out from behind the tree she had just past and clamps down on her mouth. Kahlan tries to elbow her assailant in the stomach, but is immediately released before she could even lift her arm. "Spirits, Kahlan, you shouldn't walk up behind me like that," Cara says as she breathes a sigh of relief. "I could have killed you with my agiel." To emphasize her point, the Mord'Sith places the weapon back into its holster. "What were you doing following me in the first place?"
Kahlan sighs as she sits down on a log. "Richard suggested that I follow you to the warm spring you had found."
Cara lifts a perfectly shaped eyebrow in confusion. "Is there a reason that Lord Rahl even suggested that you follow me? As you all are perfectly aware, I can take care of myself."
"He was thinking that I should follow you so I can use the spring and have you protect me in case a fearsome rabbit jumps out of the bushes," Kahlan replies with a sigh.
The Mord'Sith smirks. "And you follow his advice all the time?"
"No, I was just tired of his constant looks of concern. He said I looked as if I could use a distraction because of the events from the past few days. I felt as though I needed to get away from him. I just can't take his coddling any more!" The Mother Confessor exclaims. She sits there, shocked at her own outbursts. Coming to her senses, she backtracks, "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said anything about this to you. Just forget I said that, Cara."
Cara purses her lips into a small frown when the Confessor tells her to forget what she had previously said. "I think you should speak of this, Kahlan," the Mord'Sith whispers softly as she looks at the brunette in front of her. "Maybe you should speak with him about his delusional theory."
Kahlan smiles softly as she hears the sarcasm etch through the blonde's words. "And what delusional theory is that, Cara?"
The woman in question rolls her eyes. "The theory that makes him believe that you are some woman that needs constant protection by him and the people around him. It merely takes away from your regal presence as Mother Confessor... and takes away from what makes you, you, Kahlan."
Furrowing her brow in confusion, the Confessor crosses her arms in front of her. "What do you mean by that, Cara?"
The blonde rolls her eyes again and huffs before elaborating. "You are a strong woman, Kahlan. Not just in skill, but in heart and soul. It belittles all of you for him to believe that you can not take care of yourself." Cara's green eyes shine in the moonlight as she continues to stare at Kahlan. "I have seen what you are capable of in all three of these areas I have mentioned and know without any doubt, that you are more than capable of protecting yourself. You do not need anyone to protect you." Cara turns away and stares at the water beside them. "A person should protect themselves from you... especially their heart," the blonde murmurs softly, praying to the spirits that the brunette did not hear her confession.
Kahlan blushes slightly at the Mord'Sith's admission. She knew deep down that what happened while they were locked in the tomb was not just a lapse in judgement on the blonde's behalf, but a single moment where her heart had been unguarded. "Cara," the Mother Confessor whispers as she stands up and crosses the small distance towards the Mord'Sith.
"Don't Kahlan," Cara replies as she moves further away from the other woman and closer to a copse of trees. She could kick herself for allowing that one heartfelt admission slip through her lips. A relationship could never happen between the two women. The Mord'Sith knew that her master, Richard, the Lord Rahl, had already staked his claim to the Mother Confessor and it just would not do for her to harbour such feelings for the woman standing before her; but every single time that Kahlan had stood before her, she would feel her resolve slip. Cara knew for the longest of time, even before they were trapped, that she housed feelings for the Mother Confessor, but allowed her stoic temperament to mask the ever growing feelings of love and desire for Kahlan.
The Mord'Sith also knew that, as the days passed, Kahlan did not feel the same as Richard, but it gave Cara no small hope, for it was still treason against her master. She grasps her agiels tightly as she feels her facade breaking, vainly willing the emotions back below the surface.
"Cara, please," Kahlan murmurs as she reaches for the blonde's arm. "I know how you feel, and I think you know how I feel too. It was only a matter of time before we realised the inevitable."
The Mord'Sith loosens her grip on the agiels at her side and stares at the Mother Confessor beside. "It is wrong, Kahlan," she whispers softly as she half-heartedly pulls away from the brunette. "I can not betray Lord Rahl."
Kahlan moves closer to stand in front of Cara. "But you are not betraying Richard, Cara. I was never his! He only thought that I was. Nothing has ever been established! I have never reciprocated those feelings. He just needs to see that I am not his to protect, that I am not some thing that he owns. I am a person who has their own needs and wants. A person who does not need someone to protect them."
"You know he will not like this," the Mord'Sith replies softly as she takes a deep breath and finally allows herself to relax. She reaches up and gently cups the Confessor's cheek as she tries to still her racing heart as she finally allowed herself to submit to her own wishes.
"I don't care," Kahlan whispers as she leans her cheek further into the gloved hand of Cara. "He needs to understand that my heart is my own and that it was never his to begin with."
The Mord'Sith leans in to kiss the dark-haired woman. As their lips brush against each other, Cara lets out a sigh of relief as she feels the tension that was coiled tightly in her chest and shoulders finally dissipate. She deepens the kiss by wrapping her arm around the Confessor's lithe waist and pulls the woman closer. As they continue to kiss, the world around them seems to disappear for a few brief moments allowing the two women to only think about each other and the possibility of a future together free of anyone hunting them down.