Author's Note: WARNING. I am a flaky writer. A painful confession, but it's true nonetheless. I always tell myself 'I will complete this story before I start posting any chapters' and the results of this promise has left me with an entire file of half written literature on my laptop. As such, I should not be posting this, as it is unlikely that it will ever make it past the second chapter… But I am. Perhaps if it is liked and encouraged I will find the motivation to continue… Or I will ignore everyone's pleas for more and feel moderately guilty for teasing them with what could have been a good story. I apologize in advance, because I know exactly how it feels to start reading and hate the author for never updating… forgive me. You have all been warned.

PS- if you haven't seen the fourth movie this contains spoilers. Read at your own risk.

Prologue

Before I begin I must make one thing perfectly clear.

Let the record show that I, Elizabeth Azalea Ransbury, being of sound mind and… satisfied body, would never seduce an alien. Now if the alien seduced me… well that is an entirely different story.

It all began, you see, with my Grandmother. To portray this woman accurately I feel that all I must do is capitalize the 'G'. For she wasn't a gran, or gramma, or nana; you know, all those cute words that describe a tiny, rotund woman who bakes cookies and tells stories. No, my Grandmother was more of a 'straight-backed-hair-in-a-bun-pearls-at-her-throat' type of lady. She had a grand old house, quite as straight up and down as herself, and swathed in lace and doilies that did nothing to reconcile the severity of her personality. She did not bake cookies or tell stories, although her maid, Priscilla, was quite adept at both.

The one thing my Grandmother did do, was balls. Or rather, she hosted them. I do not jest. In the heart of twenty-first century England, my Grandmother spent her days planning and throwing events and galas worthy of any nineteenth century debutante. This was her passion and her mission- turning girls into Ladies. Again, I capitalize because to her there was a striking difference between 'Lady' and 'woman.' Ladies were demure, pretty slips of things meant to attract smart and wealthy Men. Women were… well we didn't talk about them.

Four sisters before me, and each turned out of the house as lovely, respectable Ladies. And me, well, I was as lovely and charming as any of them, and with my Grandmother's guidance, I had the whole world (if in this instance 'world' were to mean 'every eligible man of good report in England') before me.

Now, I hope I have appropriately set the stage for a fairytale worthy of any young girl's imagination….

Because I am about to bash it in, quite heartily I might add, with a stick.

For this is not the tale of Elizabeth Azalea Ransbury, who became a Lady, like her Grandmother and sisters before her. This is the story of me, (and call me what you will- how many nicknames can be made from Elizabeth?) and how I became a Woman.

It was quite by accident that I got the job. Some would call it a 'career'- quite an accomplishment in the eyes of many of my American associates, and an insult in the eyes of my Grandmother- but I would quickly come to refer to the position privately as babysitting. It did have quite the eye-catching name on paper, however; Public Relations Representative for Special Persons.

I am entirely honest when I say it was an accident, I mean yes, I did apply for the job, however I am quite certain I was never supposed to know about it in the first place. I had been in America for only four years, attending University and trying desperately to carve a life for myself among the cans of ravioli and shredded wallpaper that made up the most interesting things in my one-bedroom residence, and now that I had graduated I was quite determined to make something of myself. If only to spite my Grandmother.

The crisp, professional document describing the position I referred to must have fallen out of someone's bag, and to this day I am glad I cannot say whose, for I'm afraid it would cost them their own job. For me though, it was like finding a solid, eight-and-a-half by eleven chunk of gold right there on the sidewalk. Was this not precisely what I had gone to school for? Even before that, I have a firm belief that nothing prepares one for 'public relations' quite like a debutante ball. I read the sheet thoroughly, hardly believing my luck. And yes, it did say 'internal applicants only,' whatever company it may have been for, but I was young and confident and I made the call anyway.

Three days later I had the job. And if there were murmurs of 'not enough applicants,' and 'she'll have to do. I just hope she knows what she's in for,' well, that just made me all the more determined to prove myself. My interviewer had been a beautiful, if intimidating Asian woman named Su, who I liked to think I must have impressed in some small way, even if there weren't many applicants. My boss was a charismatic man named Joshua who didn't seem to care about my complete lack of experience in, well, anything besides choosing fancy dresses for parties. I had never had a job before, not even during my grueling university years. My Grandmother had insisted on paying my way, though I put up much resistance. I think it was her hope that if she would let me have my rebellious experience, I would come crawling back to her at some point. In retaliation I used as little of her money as possible and lived in poverty just to prove I could. However, that is beside the point. I had a job now- a real one- and I was determined to do well.

I arrived on a Monday, in the middle of the summer, eager to begin. Despite the early hour the heat had already reached a point that could be described as sweltering and between that and my nervousness, I feared for the integrity of my newly bought pant suit. At least the dry, still air did little to aggravate my… abundant curls (when I say 'abundant', think certain Scottish Disney princesses and female sidekicks to young wizards, but more blonde. Hair that should be left in stories, not put on a real human being. I look like a walking choking hazard, but I digress-), and I felt about as ready as any twenty-four year old English-American could be expected to feel.

Joshua and Su met me at the entrance to a massive warehouse complex that was to be the location of my position. I had been surprised to learn that I would be working not at the ultra-modern building in the middle of the city, but mainly at a facility in the middle of nowhere, some three hours from my home. I had been assured that accommodations would be provided, however, and the pay was too good to turn down so soon after graduation. My tiny apartment meant little to me anyway, and could see my friends on my weekends off.

I greeted my employers politely, and followed them into the closest, and largest, building in the complex. We were soon joined by a man who introduced himself as Cade Yeager, a name that sounded familiar to me, but I couldn't immediately place it. In any case, he was a friendly, modest man who indicated that we would be working closely together in my new position. I was admittedly grateful to know I would not expected to do everything myself. In fact, I still had no idea what most of my job entailed. Both Joshua and Su had been very tight-lipped on the details, and I had near signed my life away in paperwork by that point. It was frustrating. Although I had spent almost a month in training, I hardly felt prepared to represent anyone with the minimal information I had received thus far, and so it was with much enthusiasm that I agreed when Cade offered to, finally, introduce me to our clients.

"Now don't be frightened. They're softies, all of them. Just as excited to meet you as you are them, I swear." Cade explained gently.

My eyebrows may have hit my hairline then. Frightened? Was that particular reaction expected? But I nodded, doing my best to keep my expression decidedly pleasant, rather than perplexed. Cade seemed to call my bluff though, and he chuckled, shrugging as if to say 'at least I tried.' Joshua and Su shared a slightly bemused look that made me bristle. They had hired me hadn't they? I was up for the challenge, not matter how 'frightening' it may have been.

"No questions, then? Let's get going." Cade and Joshua started up a friendly conversation as we walked down a wide, plain corridor. I kept one ear on their banter, listening to snippets about a girl named Tessa, and her college escapades, but my mind was elsewhere. I felt as if I knew what must be coming, in some way, but again I could not place the thought. I felt like I had every second piece of a puzzle, and could do nothing to actually put them together as a whole picture.

While I was internally waxing poetic on puzzles, we had arrived at a large metal door, which presumably led to another warehouse, or perhaps just another part of the same one we were in- I was hopelessly lost, though we had not gone far. There was little in the way of landmarks, for the building was mostly dull metals and straight hallways. Perhaps, I thought idly, I'd best bring some red yarn to follow for next time… or bread crumbs.

I was interrupted by Cade clearing his throat. "Well," He said, "This is it. The moment you've been waiting for!"

I tried very hard not to roll my eyes at that. If this moment didn't happen soon I would be long dead. The annoyance was quickly outweighing the anticipation. Cade seemed to sense my impatience and threw open the door with little fanfare.

Before me stood four, well, 'special persons', just as the flyer had said. Four great, metal men as diverse as any group of four humans could be expected to look, or perhaps even more different. It's easy to notice such differences when they are so very large.

"Ah." I said, simply, hoping to sound nonchalant. I forced a shaky smile, "Er…Pleased to meet you."

Everyone laughed at that. The humans, tensely, and the Autobots, genuinely amused. I grinned in spite of myself. The puzzle that I had been lamenting earlier was now complete, and although I was surprised, everything made sense now. The secrecy, the location, Cade Yeager, I finally understood.

"Yer not afraid of us are you?" The round, metal-bearded giant nearest me chuckled.

And he was perfectly right, for although taken off guard, I was not at all frightened. Even as a fairly new American resident, it was impossible not to have heard of the famous, or infamous as the case may have been, Transformers. In the last decade or so they had become American legends, and worldwide history. I could easily recall now, the news stories, from barely six months earlier, of the near devastation of Hong Kong. And everything that had happened in the years before that, although I had still been in England, I had pieced together through friend reports and youtube videos.

I was giddy. I had been fascinated with these beings since my teenage years. Even during the years when they had been hunted and massacred I had felt only empathy for the aliens who had done nothing but try to protect us since their arrival. And now, now I would be working directly with them!

And so it was. I threw myself into my work with abandon. It was grueling, and unlike anything I had ever expected from my life, but so very rewarding. Cade and I soon became an unbeatable team helping our friends, Bumblebee, Drift, Crosshairs, and Hound, to strengthen and improve their somewhat rocky, (that being Hound's description- mine would be more along the lines of volatile at best) relationship with humans, and to take their place in a world so very different from their own.

Our little group soon became like family to me. With the Autobots, Cade and his family, Joshua, and Su, it took only one year before I felt very much like I had carved a niche for myself in this newfound calling, and I intended to spend many more continuing my work. It was as much as I ever could have hoped for… or so I thought.

At this point I realize that it must sound very much like I have reached the end of this story, but I assure you, I have only begun…

For what, one may ask, became of Galvatron?

And of course, I had yet to meet who this story is really about (besides myself, of course), for Optimus Prime had not yet returned to earth.