Bildo's story of the Huge Jackman
One day there was a big boy called dildo Bildo. The best day he ever had was Friday. On Friday he was bored right down to his vERY SOLE! But then a magical spark happened in his sole. He got a rection. I mean reaction to his sole. He met this sweet guy called star chrek or shrek 4 shorts. He was a really mein guy. He looked rly disturbanced by this donkay. So bildo said hega heag and he went on his way. He ran all the way 2 honk konk . thts in Japanese btw if u even do ur work in science u stuped dumb idot ;)). But instead he went 2 gagolf his long time dad but it was really he's friend well nt rly he was just a wizit cuming on his journey to bildo. He was cumming bildo and bildo says stop really faststt! But then he said I havea journey for u you have to take a journey for me uuuuu get it? Bildo said no gagolf I don I DON'T FICKING UNDERSTAND FUCKIN FICK. And gagolg said ok enoby I mean gagolf I have an explinatin and bilgo said NO I H8 AAAAAAAAAAALL WOLVES. And AND AND WIZITS! Gagolf got rrrrlly maaad n I mean rllly mad so mad he was lyke ""What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in guerilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, kiddo.""""" He was astonish..bildo I mean. You should put it on edmod said bildo. *ugh u cant come in" said gagolf. Then a ugly dragon call smoke come. Heloooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! He sed. R u a dragon he said and then he played skrim on his jupebox. Hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh said smoke he was actualy breathing fire on bildos face lol. Bildo got burned then lollygags came and gagolf was nowhere to be found. ddddddddddddddddd! This better be good bildo quest of all ur times ur foofing about.. sed lolgas. Bildo looked up at the tall, slender man with a longing gaze. His eyes were a strange shade of blue that Bildo had never seen before. Ledobas flicked his eyes down to the hobbit, giving a warm smile. Embarrassed, Bildo let one of his soft curls cover his eye, and blushed. "No! He knew I was looking at him!" Bildo thought. He felt a warm, tender hand on his chin, lifting up his face and shifting his eyes to the person towering above him. Lozenge's voice was as soft as his skin when he said, "ugh why hasent even leonado decrapio ever win an oscar befoar! He slap bildos butt and kik him into muddy mudkicks.