The Worst Code Geass Fanfiction EVER
DISCLAIMER: Code Geass rightfully belongs to it's original owners. The only thing I have done is raped and screwed over with everything I could think of, with the help of my sister. That is how horrible I am
Cast
Lelouch: A man who once ruled the world but simply can't get what he wants anymore unless he uses his geass. He always gets annoyed with his sister, Nunnally, constantly asking him to do stuff with her.
Nunnally: As much as I love Nunnally, she's retarded in this fanfic of mine. She is too naïve to even know what's going on around the Code Geass world and is always asking Lelouch to do activities with her.
Suzaku: Since Suzaku doesn't have Euphemia by his side, Lelouch is the only person he has and because of that, he is Lelouch's playtoy. Scream, you damn dirty fangirls, scream.
CC: All she wants is her Pizza Hut pizza.
Gino: After retiring from being a Knight of the Round, he has become an international pop sensation wearing many flamboyant clothes and has many fans waiting to lose their virginity to his fame!!
Kallen: She is the current bodyguard (and girlfriend) for Gino. She is highly skilled in any karate, jujutsu, and many other martial arts. Don't EVER mess with this chick!
Rolo: He has a crush on the ridiculously-retarded Nunnally. He is shy but has the voice of a theatrical background. He would often sing songs out of nowhere complete with an unseen orchestra. (Whoo…)
Rivalz: He is Rolo's best friend. Nunnally sadly doesn't notice his existence and always thinks that Rivalz is an imaginary friend.
Chapter 1: "Twister" Night
It was a lovely day in the Britannian Empire. All those things that happened in the show, well let's just pretend that a magical fairy brought back all the characters that have died to life…or something like that…
IT'S A FANFICTION DAMMIT!!!
Anyways, in lovely Britannian Empire, the Lamperouge siblings were drinking some tea and eating some crumpets for a snack along with Suzaku & CC (who ate Pizza Hut Cheesy Bite instead).
CC: My cheesy bites.
As they enjoyed their snacks, all was nice until…
Nunnally: Le~louch~~~
Lelouch spit out his tea from his mouth. He looked at Nunnally with a pissed off look on his face. He then put a fake smile. A very, very fake smile. He then talked through his teeth and said:
Lelouch: What is it, Nunnally?
Nunnally: You have been mentioning to Suzaku about playing "Twister" constantly. Can I join you guys?
Lelouch: No.
Nunnally: BUT WHYYYYYYYYY?
Lelouch: Because I said so.
Nunnally: COME OOOOO~OOOOOON!!
Lelouch: You're too retarded to play "Twister". And you're disabled.
Nunnally: What is disabibbidi-bobbidi-boo?
Lelouch put his crumpet on the plate, moved it aside, and started banging his head against the table. Suzaku turned towards Lelouch's attention in awkwardness. As for CC…
CC: My cheesy bites.
She then took another bite. Lelouch then ceased his head-banging, and looked at Suzaku with a twinkle in his eye and a perverted smile.
Nunnally: OMG!! Lelouch, there's something in your eye!
Lelouch: Uh-huh, and I'm staring right at him. ~*wink*
Nunnally got creeped out, immediately grabbed a fork, and tried to get the twinkle out. Lelouch was about to run for his life, but luckily CC grabbed the back of Nunnally's collar and sat her back down. Even though…she's disabled?? Whatever.
After snack time was over, Nunnally forced her brother and Suzaku to watch the giant screen TV with her. CC just followed of her own free will.
Suzaku: Lelouch, what is she going to make us watch?
Lelouch: I don't know, but be very afraid.
Suzaku and Lelouch held each other's hands like the lovers that they are. But they were too scared to feel their hearts skipping a beat. Nunnally flipped on the TV, and changed the channel to MTV. At that exact moment, the camera man just HAD to have pointed his camera at the star's crotch. He zoomed out to reveal that said crotch belonged to none other than Gino.
Lelouch: NUNNALLY WHAT THE *BLEEP* ARE YOU MAKING US WATCH?!?!
Suzaku: HOLD ME LEDOUCH!!!
Lelouch: What did you just call me?
Suzaku's face turned very red, and his vocal chords had stopped working. Lelouch let it slide, this time. They continued to watch the special: A Day in the Life of Gino. Lelouch deduced that the camera person was a woman (or a homosexual), for the show held many close-ups of Gino's crotch. He was wearing very tight pants. Suddenly, Lelouch got a very sneaky idea.
Lelouch: Suzaku, come here.
Lelouch motioned for Suzaku to come closer to him, as if to tell him a secret. But, faster than a cobra, Lelouch planted a wet one on Suzaku's startled lips. Just as soon as it had begun, it ended, without CC or Nunnally knowing what happened. Just like always, Lelouch's masterful planning made Suzaku speechless once more. But before Lelouch let him move back, he whispered in his ear.
Lelouch: We are so playing "Twister" tonight.
Nunnally: Can I play too?!
Lelouch: NO, YOU CANNOT!!!
Everytime Nunnally heard the word "Twister", she was always tempted to play with her brother and his boyfriend.
NO, NOT IN THAT WAY!! Perverts…
As the night came, Nunnally was told to go to sleep (so was CC). But she could help but hear Lelouch and Suzaku next door to her room. She then got on her wheelchair, grabbed her video camera, and filmed a peek inside her brother's room.
We're not giving you any details. Instead, read the wonderful dialogue that Lelouch & Suzaku have together.
Lelouch: Heheh, right hand black, Suzaku.
Suzaku: Ouch! Hey, watch it with the right hand, white.
Nunnally couldn't believe what she saw! Her eyes were big, her hands were squeezing the camera, and her mouth dropped.
Nunnally: That's not how you play "Twister" you idiots!!
Lelouch and Suzaku immediately covered their bodies with sheets from the bed. Both of their faces were red and there were embarrassed.
Lelouch: Damnit, Nunnally! I told you, you couldn't play this game!
Nunnally: Obviously, you guys don't have a mat or a wheel with the red, and the blue, and the green, and the yellow!! You guys aren't following by the rules!!!
Lelouch: GO BACK TO SLEEP NUNNALLY!!!
Nunnally: Fine!! Oh, my camera's still recording.
Nunnally pressed the record button to stop and then went back to her room. After she left, Suzaku & Lelouch were left with a shocked look on their face.
Lelouch: Wait, what?!
Before Nunnally went back to her room, somebody tapped her shoulder. Nunnally turned around and saw CC (eating pepperoni pizza). A waterfall came running down Nunnally's face.
Nunnally: CC, Lelouch and Suzaku weren't playing "Twister" the right way. It makes Nunnally very sad!!
CC: Don't worry, you can make a rant and post the video on the internet.
Nunnally instantly stopped crying and looked at CC with stars in her eyes. Her smile blossomed with joys as well.
Nunnally: The interwebs? Like YouTube?
CC: More like "WatchMe". YouTube would be concerned about posting this on their site.
Nunnally: They always ruin everything. That's why I watch my AMVs on Veoh.
CC: Don't worry. You can still make a rant out of this anyway.
The next morning came. Lelouch and Suzaku were sore after last night's "game". Lelouch went to the living room and turned on the giant screen TV to the news.
Anchor: …that is why the best chicken to eat is at KFC. In others news, a rant video got over 1,000,000 hits on WatchMe in less than an hour after being posted. Why is this so popular? Could it be the yaoi fangirls? Or could it be the ranter who has that Lolita appearance to otakus?
Lelouch and Suzaku were unsure of what they were talking about. As the clip of the video rolled, they had a shocked look on their faces. They saw something that they would never think would make an appearance on TV.
Nunnally (on TV): I hate when people don't follow the rules. But this is just too far! Yesterday afternoon, I asked my brother, "You have been mentioning to Suzaku about playing "Twister" constantly. Can I join you guys?" And he says, "No you cannot, RAWR!!"
Last night I couldn't sleep so I wanted to play "Twister". I went to my brother's room and grabbed my video camera…which I don't know why…but I had the urge… Anyway, I went in my brother's room and I found that he and his boyfriend weren't playing "Twister" the correct way. No mat, no spinning thing, nothing!! Let me show you the clip to understand.
The news channel censored the footage by showing a rainforest picture. But the audio could still be heard.
Lelouch (audio): Heheh, right hand black, Suzaku.
Suzaku (audio): Ouch! Hey, watch it with the right hand, white.
Nunnally (audio): That's not how you play "Twister" you idiots!!
Lelouch (audio): Damnit, Nunnally! I told you couldn't play this game!
Their eyes popped, their mouths dropped, and Suzaku squeezed Lelouch's hand to hard. He had then suddenly felt Lelouch's body temperature rising up. Lelouch then stood up and fire started forming around him.
Lelouch: Nunnally, you are SO DEAAAAAD!!!!
Lelouch then smashed the coffee table in half as Suzaku ran for his life! As for Nunnally & CC, they shared the cheesy crust cheese pizza and they never gained any weight.