A/N: I was inspired to write this story ever since I watched Shinkenger 45, so if you're wondering, "What in the world happened to Struggling?!" Don't worry too much, it takes a while, but I'll get Chapter 2 out the moment my thoughts on it are sorted out. Meanwhile, enjoy this one-shot! (: Oh yes, this isn't an accurate representation of episode 45, I just added in the season for the effect. I honestly have no clue what season Japan is going through now.
Disclaimer: I don't own Shinkenger. Unfortunately. Don't we all want to own them. Really, who doesn't?
The autumn wind blew gently, causing yellow, orange and red leaves to be blown up by the wind and carried away in a very nonchalant manner. Amidst this peaceful scene, a solitary figure walked along the stone path. His outer countenance was peaceful – rather, it betrayed absolutely no emotion whatsoever – yet his inner being was plagued with turmoil – emotions of sadness, emptiness, nothingness, insignificance all mixed into an incoherent whole swirled in him, eating up any solace he could possibly find within himself. No longer is he needed anymore, the real Lord has shown up, nothing left in life for him to do. His retainers – no, Kaoru's retainers – no longer have anything to do with him.
"Nothing," he mused, "Absolutely nothing left for me to do in this life. I wonder what I can do from here…" Walking down the path, he observed that there was a lake nearby. Thoughts of just jumping into the lake to end it all crossed his mind, but eventually he settled for just standing there and observing his own reflection in the waters.
The wind grew stronger. Yet, he didn't make any effort to make himself warmer. Noticing the plasters on his face, he grimaced, "I'm useless, isn't it? Couldn't even deceive them till the end. And these wounds…pathetic." He shuddered as the growing wind stung his skin, and wrapped his arms around himself. As thoughts of self-inadequacy and uselessness continued to assault his mind, he slowly sank down onto the floor, squeezing his eyes shut from the pain, "No…not going to cry…absolutely not…"
Five minutes passed. No one walked by, and he was still curled up on the floor, rocking himself and trying not to allow any signs of weakness to penetrate his being.
"No one is coming…" he thought. In truth, he wished that someone, anyone, would just come over and shout, "April's Fools!" or something like that. Anyone, to come over and tell him all he went through was just a dream, that he still had everything he had, that…he was still relevant in their lives…
"Hey…" A voice. A familiar one. He did not dare to look up; whatever it is, whoever it is, he just did not dare to. Footsteps. He could hear them loud and clear. They got nearer and nearer. Panic overtook his being, "Don't come near! I said, don't come near!"
The footsteps never stopped. Anxiety was never more real than this, "Don't. Please…just don't…" His resolve was faltering. He wanted someone to come over and tell him it was okay, but he did not want pity. A strong pair of arms wrapped around him. He froze.
"Hey…it's okay. You're still our Tono…you're still my Tono…" He buried his head into the crook of the other person, "Chiaki…I'm sorry…"
Chiaki pulled him further into the embrace, almost protectively so, "Hey, what are you sorry about, huh? There's nothing to be sorry about. You just did what you were told to do…what you were raised to do. If anyone should feel sorry, it's all those bastards that forced you to do this. Don't sweat it, okay?"
His cheeks flushed, but he still managed to mumble, "But…I should never have done this to you guys…what's more, I've nothing left…" A painful shudder shot down his spine. He promised himself he would not think about it ever again. Yet, here he was, doing just that. Stupid Chiaki. He buried his head further into the crook of Chiaki's neck, which felt extremely good right now. Feelings rushed back, hitting him hard like an avalanche. More shudders, and he burrowed his head further yet again.
Chiaki felt the trembles, "Damn those people. None of them should be forgiven at all!" He planted a small kiss on the troubled boy's head, "You know…it's occasionally alright to let go and just cry…"
He shook his head. He promised himself a long time ago he would not do that. Never again would he cry. Never again would such emotions sweep him up and carry him away. No, never.
Chiaki smirked slightly, "So stubborn…" He started rubbing circles on the small of the boy's back in an attempt to soothe him, "C'mon…no one would see it…even if you have nothing left – " He bit his tongue. He didn't mean it like that! He hastily added, "I mean, I'll be here, and just me, okay?"
That proved to be the last straw for him. He knew Chiaki did not mean it, but reality was not that forgiving. The overwhelming emotions proved to be too much for even him to handle. Floodgates opened, and the tears just came. They never stopped, not for a long time. Chiaki held him tight through it all, not caring what the world thought even if they walked past and stared, glared, tutted or scorned.
After all, all he needs is Takeru, and all Takeru needs now is him.