I knew something was off the minute I woke up. Sure it was my room, it looked the same but with one major difference... All of my Winter Soldier merch was gone, at least as far as I could tell. Closer examination revealed that most of my Marvel merch had gone the way of the dodo, leaving me confused and extremely pissed off. I had spent hundreds of dollars on my collection, spent hours searching for what I wanted. Only for it all to mysteriously poof away one night as I slept (Or so I thought.) Not to be deterred I quickly opened a comedy/meme app on my phone, searching Sebastian Stan, only for it to yield no results. I switch to Google, slightly panicked. Once was coincidence, twice was happenstance, but thrice? Thrice was a terrifying thought. I quickly google any and all actors that I could remember, from Chris Evans to Gwyneth Paltrow, even RDJ himself or Benedict Wong! And not a single name came back with the results I was hoping for. It was like overnight an entire franchise disappeared, like Pompeii when Vesuvius erupted all those years ago. In my shocked state my breathing grew shallower and shallower,until I was almost hyperventilating. Luckily even in my panicked state I saw my saving grace, my galaxy backpack, emptier than normal but still holding something. My breathing still erratic but slightly better, I reach toward my salvation, like a dehydrated kidnap victim in the desert reaches for water. I rip open the bag desperately searching. My insane thought pans out for once, as inside my tiny bag is my collection of Winter Soldier merch. From Pop! figure to keychain to tsum tsum to Lego, all my Winters were stored. I slump in relief, clutching the bag to my chest like a lifeline. I knew logically something big had to have happened, so I did the only thing that made sense to me. I googled every single fictional character I could think of, from Buffy to the Winchesters, most of whom kicked back results that I expected, fictional, fake, untrue, not real. But the small percentage that kicked back other results really kicked, like a goddamned Super Soldier was attacking. The reason all my Marvel merch disappeared? It was real, from Captain America himself to Thor, from Asgard. I admittedly freaked the fuck out, scared out of my mind at what Supers being real implied. My thoughts spun wildly out of control, until a relentless buzzing caught my attention. My phone was going off like a million times a minute with notifications from Kik. I curiously unlock my phone, opening Kik to see who exactly was bothering me during my time of crisis, only to smile happily. My best friend wss messaging me, my Saxi always up for a chat. Still grinning fondly, I open up our chat, expecting a wave of hearts or other silly emojis, only to gape at what is essentially my entire world, having what appears to me as a textual panic attack. In an attempt to calm both myself and her, I try to logic my way out of what we were experiencing, only to fail epically when I realize that on top of dimension travelling we had also time travelled years into the past. I frantically message my friend, planning a meet up at her local Target, figuring it should still be there, even if we swapped universes. I quickly pack a bag full of clothes and other needed essentials, like my phone, my ipod, my portable charger, charging cables, my 3DS, its charger and all its games and my wallet. With my galaxy bag on my back and my essentials bag in my arms J start the long hour ride to where my bestfriend awaits. Thirty minutes into the trip I start panicking again, frantically searching in my essentials bag...(You know what? Fuck it, its a go bag now!) ... searching in my go bag for my notebooks. I sigh in relief, glad they too made the transition. J continue my journey, secure in my knowledge that I am a nobody in this universe, so no Super should be at all interested in my craziness. Finally I arrive at our agreed meeting point, the electronics section in Target. After taking a moment to gather my thoughts and steel myself, I start searching for my friend. "Saxi!" I call lightly, wandering around like I am browsing the products. "Maxi!" I hear her respond from an isle over. I rush down the isle Im in and around the corner, knly to run into what felt like a brick wall. Staggering back I glance up and do a quick double-take. 'OH SHIT! It's the Winter Soldier! Quick act like an idiot and apologize, then get as far away as you can.' my thoughts race. After a bet of silence I widen my eyes and prepare to lie and act like a dumbass. "Sorry!" I cry out quietly, "That wss such an egg move. I cant believe I lept before I looked. Sorry, Im very clumsy... Oh shoot! Lemme get outnof your way and outta your hair! Sorry again for being such an egg!" I babble, sidestepping around the Soldier, almost gracefully. "Maxi?" I hearmy friend call again, closer than before. I quickly finish rounding the corner, squealing in joy the second I spot her. We embrace in what looks to outsiders as an intimate hug, but to us it was the best hug ever(TM still pending). I start tugging her away from the endcap where I ran into /him, whispering "We gotta go, its not kosher here, the candy is stale and the liquor is little more than wormy and dirty." She nods, understanding my code for 'Its not safe here, gheres danger and maybe fighting or fire'. We start moving. Arm in arm, slowly like we were walking in the park, away from the section, only to stop short when a familiar Russian word comes from behind us. A casual glance reveals the Soldier? or maybe Barnes? surrounded by three men, armed by the looks of the odd bulges in their street clothes. Another Russian word, again familiar, is spoken by one of the three men. I spare a glance at my friend and see my own resolve reflected twofold back at me. With a nod, we start acting the part of flirty girls, complete with hair flipping, muscle compliments, and batted eyelashes at the three men. They seem baffled, allowing us closer on accident. Sharing a devilish grin with my friend, we strike, kneeing groins and scratching faces. The men recoil in suprise, the first one I kneed looking ready to kill, so I give him a solid right hook straight to the temple, knocking him out. In a whirl I elbow the second in the ribs, letting Saxi grab him and give her own hit, knocking him out like a light. I had forgotten about the third until the sound of a body hittingbthe floor reaches me. Whipping around, fists raised to attack, I pause. It seems that Barnes had taken down the third man by using our distraction. "I dont know who those guys are," I lie "but you sjoild probably leave before more show up." He looks at me suspiciously, which I completely understand, but ultimately takes my advice, hustling out of the store like he was running for his life(which he totally was.) Arm in arm again, my friend and I wander up to the Starbucks seating area and sit, trying to figure out what happened to make us switch universes so suddenly. We sit there for hours, going from serious to silly, changing topics like a bored kid changes channels. I excuse myself, running to the bathroom, when I get back a scary sight lays before me... My bestfriend still seated at the four person table we chose, but instead of being alone she is boxed in with what looks to the the Barnes search party(TM still pending) of civilian clothed Steve Rogers, Sam Wilson, and Natasha Romanoff. I quickly make my way over and pull up a seat, watching the search party tense up as my friend relaxes. "What's up bitches?" I question as casually as I can, acting like a typical teenager. Out of the corner of my eye I can see Steve flinching minutely at my choice in words. Sam on the other hand cuts straight to the point. "We need to talk to your friend in private," He says "she may have seen our missing friend recently." "Well guess what? Y'all have to take me too, cuz there is no way in hell or helheim I am letting my friend go off with you shady looking motherfuckers." I retort defensively, hackles raised, ready for a fight. Sam and Steve look taken aback, Natasha on the other hand seems to ramp up the killing intent she extrudes like pheromones. Choosing to ignore them I get up and hover over my friend, checking her over for any bruises or other harm. Completely ignoring the other three I ask my Saxi, "If candy is dandy but liquor is quicker, do you ship it?" making sure shes mentally prepared for whatever we are about to face. She grins widely and replies "Bitch, I ship it so hard the Titanic is jealous." Confirming to me that she is as prepared as possible. She rises from her seat, grabbing her own go bag. Together, we walk away from the three searcher, hand in hand. After a moment a large hand lands solidly on my shoulder stopping me dead in my tracks. I look over my shoulder to see who stopped me, only to gape. Sam Wilson was the one who stopped us and boy does he look pissed. Still keeping a grip on my Cheesecakes hand I throw a cheeky grin over my shoulder, along with a "Keep up losers, where the fuck we goin?" Unable to stop himself Steve (who was behind Sam) scolds me with a "Language!" I snort, unwilling to stop my response "Twenty-first century American English, southern." Beside me Saxi gives a startled laugh. I grin again, asking "So seriously, where the heck are we going? Do y'all have like a creeper van or something? Maybe a cool sports car?" "You will see..." Natasha trains of, taking the lead and walkingout of the store, closely followed by Saxi and I, still hand in hand. Behind us, Sam and Steve follow, watching us like we were about to bolt. Out of nowhere my phone starts ringing, playing the scariest sound I have ever heard. The ringtone of my mother calling me. I pale rapidly, gearing up to talk my way out of being grounded, praying to Loki that my tongue is silver enough. Quickly hitting answer on my phone I greet my mother brightly. "Hi Mom! How are you doing?" "I would be better if I hadnt come home to an empty driveway." What little color I had left drained from my face. "Hear me out ma, it was an emergency! It still is an emergency! In fact I gotta go now, LuvyaBye!" I quickly say, hanging up with a wince. I turn my phone to silent, hoping to stave off the inevitable. Luvkily the searchers seem distracted by a commotion in front of us. Several shady vans had rolled up and unloaded a bunch of goons who looked geared up for a big fight. "Well shit." I whisper, letting go of my friends hand. "I dont suppose they are with you?" She questions, sounding every bit as terrified as I feel. Natasha shakes her head, pulling out a set of batons from somewhere. Steve and Sam are also suddenly armed. (Thinking back, their jackets did seem bulkier than what I expected.) The biggest and dumbest goon of the lot steps forward, stating confidently "Give up the Asset and we wont fight you this time." I snort unattractivly, unintentionally drawing the head goons attention. "Hes gone," I say, knowingly. "He left like a week ago, gods man keep up with the times. Last I heard he was headed for Canada, something about Tim Hortons?" I lie, straightfaced and grinning. The head idiot blinks rapidly before shouting "Retreat!" And like like returning to a toppled over hill, the dumb goons jump back into the shady vans and take off like hellhounds are after them. I giggle loudly, Saxi joining in after a beat. After a minute or two of laughter I stop, saying "Chuck damned idiots didnt even think that I was lying. I swear some people really need intelligent keepers." "Well," Saxi starts, "they are goons, sk you know, they really are just cannon fodder." "Hmm, true" I decide, nodding. I thought about what I just said to the goons and groan, Saxi turning towards me with a confused look. I hang my head, saying at a normal volume "Well shit, I was hoping to go home soon, oh well I guess the cats outta the bag, I know. I really should learn how to keep my fat mouth shut, but damnit I love witty banter!" Natasha turns to give me a cat that got both the cream and the canary and set up the dog to take the fall grin. From behind us I can hear Steve losing his shit over the fact that I know something about his best friend. Sam though was trying to quietly calm Steve down from his Bucky induced craze. Natasha leads us like pigs to the slaughter behind Target, where a quinjet is parked in the field. I enter the quinjet with excitement and a healthy dose of suspicion. Quickly finding a seat I vow to stay as silent as I possibly can, trying to not incriminate myself even further. I abandon my go bag on the floor, but clutch my galaxy backpack to my chest, unwilling to part with my collection. Saxi settles in next to me immediately, running her fingers through my hair, calming me. I lean into her touch, enjoying the familiar peace. By pure accident I unwillingly fall asleep, tipping over to lean fully on my friend.
