Title: Tomorrow is Another Day
Author: Nia'sHiddenPuzzlePiece
Summary: As everyone is out having fun, Zack stays at home and reflects on his life.
Rating: K
Please comment and let me know what you think, good or bad, so I can make my next stories better. I currently have 2 ideas for more.
I own Bones, well seasons 1-4 on DVD and that's it.
Everyone Zack knew was out having fun at the Royal Diner, everyone but him. He was working on finishing his dissertation, for his forensic anthropology doctorate, when his best friend came to the door; his eyes shining with excitement for reasons Zack could only try to guess. Jack Hodgins asked if he was ready to go on an impromptu trip. Zack informed him that he could not be ready for a trip he knew nothing about. Zack was annoyed by this point, not that many would be able to guess, as Zack always seemed to carry himself the same way no matter his mood. Jack just gave Zack a look while Zack was trying to weigh the pros and cons of going to the diner.
They had just solved a particularly difficult case that day, due in part to Zack spending most of his time that week awake and at the lab, only going home when Jack dragged him to the car and drove them home. Even then he kept going over the case in his mind. It wasn't until that morning that Zack had the epiphany that led to the case being solved. Afterwards, everyone went home early that day to take proper showers that were neglected due to the stress of the case. As soon as Zack was washed up and dressed he sat at the kitchen table and started working on his dissertation again, wanting everything to be just right.
~He also got a bit annoyed at the thought that he didn't know if he could handle seeing Angela and Jack together.~ Jack always looked so happy around her and Zack doubted his ability to make the older man- or anyone for that matter- look like that. Seeing them together was like a sharp jab to him that made him want to crawl inside himself, more so than he already did, in an attempt to shy away from the pain. He never really understood why he felt like that- maybe it was a slight jealousy of Angela- but that was completely illogical, Angela was his friend.
Zack sighed internally and declined the offer. Gesturing to the kitchen table; well, more so the anthropological text, several caffeinated drinks, a copy of his dissertation thus far and a red pen that completely covered the poor table. Jack looked like he was going to protest but at that moment he received a text message from Angela. His face lit up and as soon as he finished his reply text; he took one look at Zack's face and shrugged, walking away. Zack closed the door behind his friend, feeling empty yet oddly complete at the same time. He got time to work on his paper but his best friend would rather be with his girlfriend again and leave Zack alone.
The memory caused Zack's mind to drift to instances of attempts to socialize when he was younger. He wanted to have friends and have people think of him as interesting but instead he was alone, no one wanted to be around him for long. He had issues with following conversations that were more social than scientific and after years of having only the occasional friend or two, he fully gave up trying.
Everyone, with the exception of Dr. Brennan, thought he was horrible at social interactions and after multiple times of people reacting in a way he did not anticipate and having his colleagues and friends point out what he did wrong, he now took it as fact. He tried to remember all the tips they kept repeating to him but he got so overwhelmed. It was like a part of him- the part that wanted to try to connect with others, the part that he did not want to admit existed- shut down and the part of him that had a weird sense of pride in his social ineptitude took over and went on autopilot.
He supposed his college life didn't help. He remembered once seeing a button that read:
1. Social life
2. Adequate sleep
3. Good grades
Pick two. (Welcome to college)
It appeared to him as though most picked numbers 1 and 2 or 1 and 3. Not Zack, for him it was 2 and 3. He never really tried to engage in number 1. Thousands of people living on campus with him and he could barely make small talk with his lab partners, opting instead for the more sensible option of focusing on his work. He never understood the purpose of small talk anyway.
Sighing, Zack decided to give his dissertation a rest- he was nearly finished now. All that was left was for him to type it up and then submit it. He would complete it tomorrow.
The cliché 'tomorrow is a new day' sprang to mind, but he couldn't help thinking that most things don't go away just because the world completed another rotation on it's axis and briefly pondered why others would think that it did, when time and science proved this was not the case.
Everyday, as Zack wakes up he promises himself that today will be the day. Today he will act 'normal'. Every night he goes to bed trying to ignore that he yet again broke his promise. It was a vicious cycle that he couldn't seem to break. He had spent most of his childhood and adolescence as a scientifically brilliant social recluse, it was ingrained as a part of his personality now, according to psychologists. Maybe he was trying to change too late. Maybe, despite his friends urging, he didn't want to change.