I'm Not Perfect, a hetalia - axis powers fanfic

Today I washed my makeup away, so the mirror could see my face.
I wanted all my pain to portray what my words could not say.

He couldn't stop running. He didn't care if the bell had just rung; he didn't care that class would be starting in a few minutes. He wouldn't be missed anyway.

Matthew practically slammed into the bathroom sink. Running a hand through his hair, the Canadian looked at his slightly deranged appearance and tried to fight back the tears that threatened to pour.

Turning on the sink, Matthew washed his face, forgetting about the makeup he had put on that morning. He looked back up and barely stopped the sob that tried to slip out.

The image reflected back was terrifying with the black eye covering the almost a full quarter of his face and a purplish bruise over his chin. But the worst wasn't the physical marks; it was the pain and emptiness in his eyes.

Cause I'll never be good enough
They see my tears and call my bluff
Gotta tough it out and suck it up to stay, to stay
Keep on runnin to the top, no time to breathe, no time to stop

He remembered it all too clearly, as the events had taken place just yesterday.

Isaiah slammed Matthew against the lockers, his face full of rage.

"You thought you could hide from me, did you Jones?"

"I-I'm not Al-Alfred! I-I'm h-his bro-brother Matthew!"

The Cuban laughed and drew his fist back. "Nice try, Jones."

After Isaiah had let him go, Matthew had stumbled to find his brother. When he found him, Alfred had just laughed and asked him if he had walked into another door. He had laughed along, not wanting to ruin his brother's always happy mood.

But I…

The Canadian ran his hand through his hair again. He couldn't do this anymore.

Gotta shut the world out and breakdown so I can see what's left to leave
Time for me to be alone, where I feel home and remember what I believe
I just wanna cry out loud, cuz it's the only sound that will truly set me free

He let out a cry of distress and collapsed onto the ground. Matthew's body shook from his tears and soon the bathroom was filled with sounds of despair. As sad as it was, he knew no one would come if they heard the sounds, but he found he didn't care at the moment. He preferred to be alone with his sorrows. Crying was the only thing that set him free.

I'm standing still to say to you, I'm not perfect
Just thought you should know

He wasn't his brother; he didn't have a perfect form or tons of friends. Hell he didn't even have one friend. He wasn't the most popular kid in school, nor was he part of any club. The teachers never remembered him…his parents never remembered him.

He wasn't any good at sports and held no talent except for his intelligence. But maybe if he was better at something he would be noticed and not shoved into lockers when attempting to walk through the hallway.

So hard I can't find my way and I'm tired of all this rain
I'm damaged and so ashamed, only half my soul remains

The more he thought about all his faults, the harder the tears fell. He was so tired of crying; he was so tired of the pain. Matthew knew that from all the hurtful actions, he was slowly breaking from the inside out.

He was damaged goods…if he could even be considered goods.

Cause I'll never be pretty enough
They see my tears and call my bluff
Gotta tough it out and suck it up to stay, to stay
Keep on runnin to the top, no time to breathe, no time to stop

He and Alfred looked almost exactly the same. Their hair were both different lengths, but they were the same shade of blond. They both had the same skin tone, and they both had blue eyes – save for the fact Matthew's looking slightly more purple then blue.

But, Alfred had more muscle. Alfred was taller, and he was certainly louder. Matthew was nearly a twig with his shorter frame and small form. His yelling voice was quieter than a normal person's speaking voice.

But I...

Matthew didn't realize the final bell ringing, and he didn't hear the people rushing through the hallways to leave the school. He didn't know how long he had been there, and he didn't know when he had started to spit out incomprehensible words.

It wasn't until he heard the door beginning to open did he snap back into reality. Matthew had jumped up so quickly that he hit his head on the bottom of the sink. Crashing back onto the floor, the Canadian let out a loud yelp of pain. He was so absorbed in the growing pain in his head that he didn't hear the shuffling of someone crouching down beside him.

"Hey, are you alright?"

Jumping once again, Matthew let out a small scream. He looked up, feeling more embarrassed than upset at being caught in such a state.

"I-I'm fine." He mumbled back. "Just leave me alone, please."

The boy before him scoffed. "The awesome me couldn't leave a damsel in distress!"

Matthew blushed. "I'm not a damsel." He recognized the boy now. He was Gilbert Beilschmidt, a student in his year.

"But you are in distress, and that is totally unawesome!"

I'm standing still to say to you I'm not perfect, perfect

Matthew hid his head in his hands. "Can you please just leave? I don't need help."

Gilbert's voice softened. "You need help Mattie; you don't have to deal with everything on your own.

Matthew's head snapped up. "You know my name?"

Confusion flickered in the albino's red eyes. "Of course I do. Why wouldn't I?"

"I-It's just that no one ever does…"

Ooh, I'm so afraid, so afraid
Of change, change
And ooh, I know it's the only way

Matthew gasped as he was pulled into a tight hug. "I've always remembered you Birdie. How could I forget about someone as awesomely awesome as you?"

Gotta shut the world out and breakdown so I can see what's left to leave
Time for me to be alone, where I feel home and remember what I believe
What I believe
I just wanna cry out loud cuz it's the only sound that will truly set me free
It will set me free

He couldn't help it. Matthew began sobbing fresh tears and found himself clutching the front of Gilbert's shirt, not allowing his newly found friend any way to leave.

Shaking away the shock, Gilbert hugged Matthew tighter, letting his actions show that he wouldn't let the boy go. After awhile, the sobs turned into pained gasps and whimpers until they stopped completely.

Breaking the sudden silence, Matthew whispered, "I want to believe that this is real – that tomorrow you're still going to be my friend and that I will finally have someone who sees me. But…I'm scared. I'm absolutely terrified that you'll leave, or that this is just my imagination. I don't want to be alone anymore."

"You'll be ok."

"I don't know if that's true."

I'm standing still to say to you I'm not perfect, perfect
Just thought you should know

"You know what I think?"

Matthew looked up questionably, silently urging the albino to continue.

"You're perfect, Birdie."

Tears formed once more, but this time out of happiness – not relief or sadness as they had before.

"I just thought you should know," Gilbert said, a small smile appearing as he hugged Matthew again, placing a short kiss on the blonde's forehead.

Just thought you should know

Sappy ending is sappy.

I'm back bitches! I missed you all and I'm happy to anounce my new fav fannon HETALIA! My OTPs are Spamano and (obviously) PruCan!

I'm pretty happy with how this turned out. No, it isn't my best work, but i still think it's good. I hope you all agree.

THat's about it. Lov ya all!