TITLE: Alright
RATING: PG
CLASSIFICATION: Buffy song fic.
SUMMARY: Buffy reminisces and looks to the future.
SPOILERS: Set after season 4 finale. Mentions of several season 3 and 4 events.
DISCLAIMER: Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, Kazui, Sandollar, FOX and the WB own everything. The Lucy Nation own the song 'Alright'.
AUTHOR'S NOTES: Ok, this is a song I really like and have been
listening to almost constantly recently, so I then thought, while reading some fic, that
it identifies with Buffy a bit. Not completely sure if it all does but this is my first go
at a song fic.
*****
Buffy sat in her dorm room. Her life was almost finished being packed into cardboard boxes. Summer was nearing rapidly. She got to go home now. Next year seemed a lifetime away. Now she had alone time as she went through the few remaining items yet to be packed. A random stake and bottle of holy water, a photograph of herself with Willow and Xander, the book of poetry Angel had given her on her eighteenth birthday. This was the drawer she was most reluctant to go through. It withheld in it's small space a lifetime of painful memories. The CD player whirred to a stop and Buffy pressed play again.
*****
I don't want to be the one
The one whose always left behind
Will there ever come a day
When I can turn around and say
It's alright now
It's alright now, yeah, yeah
It's alright now
*****
Buffy wasn't going to her dad's for summer this year. He was too busy. He didn't seem to have any time for her recently. Something always came up. Talks all over the college had got stuck on the subject of holidays. What exotic destination they were going to, what enchanting person they were going with, and the thing they reveled in the most, getting away from Sunnydale. Buffy didn't get to this summer. Soon her father would have no time for her whatsoever and she'd never escape this hellmoth she was living on. It was her home for good, whether she liked it or not. She was pretty sure that she would die here. She didn't want to hold her friends back. Willow had decided to stay for college but did that mean the rest of her life? She would surely want to get away and live her life to the full. Angel and Oz had already escaped, though they liked to use other reasons. Xander for now seemed like he would stick around, seeing as he hadn't got further than his parents basement. But one day he might just take that road trip a little further. Giles seemed content, but then he didn't really have anything keeping in here. Except Buffy.
*****
I don't want to be the one
The one whose always left undone
Losing more and more
I'm drained of everything
Falling down
I'll go see-through in the sun, saying
It's alright now
It's alright now, yeah, yeah
It's alright now
*****
Buffy didn't really want to be the thing her friends felt obligated to. Buffy wanted them to live good lives. Buffy would inevitably get them killed. It was a burden that no-one else should have to keep on their shoulders. It's just for the Slayer. The Chosen One. Not the chosen one and a group of friends. Things weren't right. Buffy needed to let them go. But how?
*****
Waiting, watching,
Restoration for those who stay,
Waving to those who walk away
*****
But then everyone chose to be there. No-one had to stay. Not everything was bad with Buffy. Without Buffy this place would probably be condemned to hell. Buffy wouldn't be living now if it wasn't for the gang. It's their choice. Buffy packed the rest of her stuff into the last box just as Willow and Xander came striding into the room laughing at some passing joke. Buffy smiled. They were happy.
*****
I don't want to be the one
If I could see it, If I could only feel it
Will there ever come a day
It's alright now
It's alright now, yeah, yeah
It's alright now
It's alright now
It's alright now, yeah, yeah
It's alright now
It's alright now
It's alright now, yeah, yeah
It's alright now
*****
Maybe this was how it was meant to be. Maybe everything could be alright.
End