Why do we build these walls around our hearts? Why do we hide within ourselves, for fear of rejection and humiliation, only to watch as our opportunities fade to nothingness? When one allows themselves to be swallowed by this spiral of darkness and self-doubt...
It is unlikely they will ever see the light.
Such is the story of a love so pure, it was not meant for this earth...
Such is the story of Beast Boy and Raven.
[Send away for a priceless gift
One not subtle, one not on the list
Send away for a perfect world
One not simply, so absurd
In these times of doing what you're told
You keep these feelings, no one knows
What ever happened to the young man's heart
Swallowed by pain, as he slowly fell apart]
"Hello?"
The sorceress walked into the darkness of the wood, eyes scanning for a familiar face, a comforting flash of green amongst the gloom...
There came a snap of a twig, the bird song stopped and the forest became drenched in silence...
Suddenly a jade tiger leapt from the trees, tackling the Azarath and the two rolled end over end into a grassy clearing...
"Hey Rae" Smiled the shape-shifter, as he leaned over the girl's face from his seated position on her stomach.
Raven blinked
Instantly Beast Boy was encased in a blanket of black energy, as he flew backwards into a tree.
"Hello to you too..." He groaned painfully, as he feel forward with a loud "Whump!"
Raven smiled, "Ok now that's funny!"
"Happy to be of service, just warn me next time..." He said lifting himself off the ground
"The other's are back at the picnic," Said Raven softly, "They'll be expecting us back..."
"Actually I wanted to talk to you about something..."
Two teens walk into a secluded wood, sounds like the set up for a joke or low budget movie, sadly even in the titans world of adventure, romance and comedy, very rarely do things go flawlessy...
When a city's elite defender's go to the park, they're bound to get some attention...
Very rarely good attention...
Fate has a cruel sense of humor
"What did you want to tell me?" The girl spoke
The assassin glared at the pair through his sight. Kids? He scowled again. He'd been warned by every group he came across that Slade paid well, but the man was a nut...
Oh well, a man has to know who signs his paycheck...
The gunman cocked his rifle
Beast Boy looked away from Raven and up into the clear blue sky...
"I've been thinking a lot, about a lot of things since Terra died..."
Raven raised an eyebrow, rarely in the months since the girl's death had he spoken about the incident, she knew he thought of it often, he'd never really seemed the same. Almost like his childlike innocence had been stolen...
Such is the fate of all Teen Heroes one way or another...
"I never loved her..."
------------ ---------------------------------------- ------------------ -------------------
The sniper pulled a quarter from his pocket, "Heads the boy, tails the girl..."
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"Beast Boy..."
"Let me finish," he said softly but sternly, "My love for her was an extension of love for myself..." He paused "She was so like me, so low maintenance, it was like a break from reality, from all the pain, all the responsibility. I was using her for that feeling."
"That's not true," Raven cooed soothingly, "Don't be so hard on yourself..."
Beast Boy turned his back to the goth.
"When she died, I was brought back to earth, yet somehow when I should have been absorbed in self loathing and pity, I wasn't."
Raven stayed silent
"You showed me a kindness no one has ever shown me. You were always there through every stage of my mourning, until my mind wasn't on Terra at all it was on thoughts of, longing for you..."
He turned back to her, eye's pleading...
"I love you for that, Raven..."
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The coin shown in the sun light as in spun in air, falling into the man's hand...
"Tails... You lose..." He smirked
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[And I'm staring down the barrel of a 45,
Swimming through the ashes of another life
No real reason to accept the way things have changed
Staring down the barrel of a 45]
"You love me?"
"Yes... I understand if things are weird between us now, but I had to get that off my chest..."
"That's so... so..."
"Stupid? Idiotic? Ignorant?"
"Sweet."
Beast Boy raised his head to look Raven in the eye. Her violet orbs pierced him, chilling his very soul. He loved her for that too...
"What do you mean?"
"Beast Boy I Lo-"
That's as far as she got...
------------------ --------------------------- ---------------------------------------------------
The hit man smiled, "Bye Bye Birdy..." As he pulled the trigger.
Bang
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[Send a message to the unborn child
Keep your eyes open for a while
In a box high up on the shelf, left for you, no one else
There's a piece of a puzzle known as life
Wrapped in guilt, sealed up tight
What ever happened to the young man's heart
Swallowed by pain, as he slowly fell apart]
The other titans eventually sensed something was wrong, Later they would tell Beast Boy they found him clutching Raven's body, drenched in blood that was not his own, babbling incoherently...
He was always a little fuzzy with the details of that afternoon...
---------------------- ------------------------------ -----------------------------------------
Why the walls around our hearts? Why do we wait until it's too late to do what we desire? So much could have been prevented if the two had only been more open with their feelings...
"It's not your fault..."
The funeral had been small, merely the titan's and several honored guests. Midway through Beast Boy found he had to excuse himself. It fell upon Cyborg to console him...
"How is it not my fault?!?! If I'd told her any other day, If she hadn't followed me into the woods, If I just didn't love her as much as I do, this wouldn't have happened! I wasted every second I had with her..."
"Wondering 'What If' is only you torturing yourself. We have to live with what happened, It'll be hard but it's not like your in this alone."
That was a long time ago...
Things change...
Time Changes everything...
[Everyone's pointing their fingers
Always condemning me
And nobody knows what I believe
I believe]
'That was a very long time ago' mused the Shape- Shifter as he passed a hand through his graying hair....
Robin and Starfire had been the first to leave, he hadn't been surprised, a family needs room to grow. Their kids were cute, two boys and a girl, they stopped by every know and again to see how he was...
Cyborg left soon afterwards, Beast Boy understood, he wouldn't want to hang out with himself either, an aging super hero who still bears the torch for a girl he knew 20 years ago...
It was just him in the abandoned ruin that was once the Tower...
Well he wasn't completely alone...
"Raven..."
He could still sense her from time to time... the gentle fluttering of a cape, the quiet turning of a page, the bittersweet smell of Sandalwood and Herbal Tea...
"Beast Boy..."
The Shape-shifter's ears perked at the sound of a voice he hadn't heard in almost a quarter of a century...
"You again?" he frowned, bowing his head... Why did he put himself through this...
"I'm sorry about what happened..."
"That makes two of us..."
"I just want you to know I love you."
"You can't feel love." He said flatly still not facing the voice.
"Why not?"
"Because you're not real... no matter how much I need you to be..."
There was a gentle fluttering of the wind, and Beast Boy knew the apparition was gone...
"I Love you Raven..." He Whispered as he slipped off into the gloom of Titan's tower.
[And I'm staring down the barrel of a 45,
Swimming through the ashes of another life
No real reason to accept the way things have changed
Staring down the barrel of a 45]
Why these walls around our hearts?