Author's Note: Just a little character piece I wrote after watching Advent's Children, imagining what could happen next. Hope you like it!
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The Waiting Game
The ticking of the clock was unbearably loud in the empty room.
Tifa languidly ran her fingers along the edge of the bar counter, and kicked the toe of her right boot against the floor in a counter rhythm to that set by the ticking.
She glanced at the clock again but the time hadn't changed since the last time she had looked. Why was time moving so slowly?
She glanced over the bar once again but anything she could have done to pass the time was already done. Absentmindedly she straightened the pile of beer mats for what felt like the hundredth time and sighed.
Waiting around just didn't suit her at all...where was he?
It had been more than a month already since Cloud had defeated Sephiroth once and for all, but it was almost as if nothing had changed. Perhaps foolishly, Tifa had believed things would change for the better.
Seeing Cloud smile on the day it all ended had awakened a hope she had thought long dead; the hope that they could finally be a normal family.
But when it came down to it, nothing had changed.
Cloud did his job, Tifa did hers and everyday it seemed more and more as if they were strangers who just happened to be sharing a roof.
Sometimes it seemed as if they didn't even live under the same roof, as strangers or not, when Cloud would disappear for days on end at times for 'deliveries'.
He never let Tifa know where he was going and he seemed so surprised when she asked him that she felt the words stick in her throat.
They saw each other little enough as it was, so she didn't want their only conversation to become a chore. So she swallowed her questions and tried to be grateful for what little time they did have together. But the air was thick with the things she left unspoken, and the constant not knowing...how would she even know if something were to happen to him?
The door slammed open and Tifa's head snapped up in anticipation. Marlene ran through, giggling and pursued by Denzel.
"Caught!" he grabbed her by the arm with a grin.
Marlene pouted, "You can't catch me now. I'm in den!"
"No you're not. Den's the bar and you're not there yet" Denzel protested.
"Fine," Marlene scowled, "I don't want to play anymore"
"But Marlene..."
Tifa stepped in before they really began to argue, "Welcome home kids. How was school?"
"Fine!" they chorused, although Denzel still looked disgruntled.
Marlene brightened, their disagreement already forgotten, "Tifa! Is Cloud home yet?"
Tifa tried to hide her true feelings behind a smile, "Not yet Marlene"
"Aw, but he's been gone for ages..."
Denzel hit her with a warning elbow, seeing Tifa's fake smile fading.
"Ow! What did you do that for?" Marlene rubbed her arm and glared at her adoptive brother.
Tifa smiled for real then, "Come on, let's go upstairs."
It wasn't good to get Marlene and Denzel worried, no matter how worried she herself might be over where Cloud was. He could take care of himself. Worrying about him had never brought him back any sooner before and it wasn't going to start now.
Upstairs she prepared some snacks while Denzel and Marlene changed out of their school uniforms. In some ways at least she could try to be a mother to them, even if she couldn't hold together the perfect family she had imagined.
Cloud would be a good father if he tried, Tifa just knew it, and he was when he was at home...but he simply wasn't at home for long enough or often enough to maintain any semblace of normalcy. So many times she had tried to tell him that they needed him, but it was becoming increasingly harder to say it to him when it felt as if he were becoming more distant everyday.
"Tifa! It's starting!"
She took her normal spot on the sofa between her adopted children as the cartoon's theme began playing. It was their little ritual after school, their time together as a family.
She loved both the children as if they were her own, and in every sense of the word she considered them hers. But someday Marlene would go back to live with Barret full-time and their little family would be one person smaller.
As for Denzel...he was the one in whom the changes were most remarkable. While suffering from the geostigma he had often been confined to his bed with the pain. Now, only a short time afterwards he was already noticeabley stronger. He had recently hit a growth spurt and taken up athletics at school and it made Tifa happy to see him without the crease of pain between his eyes she had grown so accustomed to. He had never given up fighting and now he could finally lead a normal life like he deserved to.
Tifa ruffled his hair affectionately and smiled as he protested. Recently he had been saying he was too old for her to fuss over him as much as she did, but she knew that he liked it really. Her little family made her happy, but with Cloud gone it felt like something was missing...it felt like they were all just waiting for him to come home.
Life was on pause until he returned.
Tifa glanced at her watch as unobtrusively as possible. She had been trying to get in touch with Cloud since he had left, restricting herself to one message a day in case she sounded too desperate. She thought he understood now that they cared about him, but he still didn't seem to understand how much they all needed him...how much Tifa needed him.
Finally, he had called back the day before and Tifa had nearly screamed in frustration when she had missed the call because of the noise in the bar.
Still, maybe it was better that way as she had her pride and she didn't want Cloud to think that all she was doing was waiting for him, no matter how uncomfortably close to the truth that sometimes was.
He had left a message and the sound of his voice made her feel as if a weight had been lifted off of her chest. He had distinctly said that he would be back at 3pm...but it was after 4 now and there was still no sign of him.
Marlene seemed to realise she was preoccupied and correctly guessed what she was thinking about.
"When's Cloud coming home?"
"I spoke to him yesterday", Tifa told a small white lie, "He said he would be back soon"
She didn't want to get their hopes up by telling them that she was even now waiting for Cloud to arrive. Indeed she felt like she had done nothing all day except wait for the sound of his motorbike drawing up outside.
Denzel nodded and went back to the cartoon, seemingly unperturbed but Tifa knew that he missed Cloud just as much as Marlene even if he wasn't so vocal about it.
Their evening followed its usual routine with dinner and homework and the normal bickering between Marlene and Denzel. But no matter how peaceful it appeared, they were all aware that there was one more person who should have been there.
His absence seemed to make a joke of their happy family.
Tifa started up from the table as she heard the roar of a motorbike engine, then settled herself once again with a faint blush spreading across her cheeks.
Denzel looked up from his cards, "It's not him...Fenrir sounds different"
Tifa nodded, still embarrassed, but nothing more was said.
From the way she was behaving both Marlene and Denzel had guessed that Cloud was expected back and all three of them were playing the card game with half of their attention directed to listening for his bike. There was a tension, an anticipation in the air, and no amount of time wasting could diffuse it.
They all knew that they were waiting and the slow, interminable tick of the clock eventually drowned out any conversation.
Night fell and still no Cloud.
Tifa began preparations for opening the bar while the children got ready for bed.
The phone rang when she was halfway down the stairs and Tifa sighed. Typical!
Cloud's room was exactly as it had been since he moved in, with the only personal touch being their family photograph on the desk. Tifa picked it up as she answered the phone.
"Good evening. Strife delivery service"
"Tifa!" A familiar voice boomed down the line.
"Barrett! How are you?"
"Fine, fine...listen can I speak to Cloud?"
Tifa frowned, "He's not here at the moment Barrett. If it's something important you should probably try his mobile phone."
"I did but he didn't pick up. When I spoke to him yesterday I could have sworn he said he would be at Seventh Heaven today"
Tifa's heart leapt into her throat, "You don't think something's happened do you?"
Barret scoffed, "Of course not, that kid can take care of himself! It's nothing urgent. Is Marlene still up?"
"Of course. I'll just call her now."
Tifa reacted on auto-pilot, calling Marlene and passing the phone across to her before walking slowly downstairs.
Her heart was beating rapidly but she tried to think rationally. It was silly to get worried about the simple fact that Cloud hadn't turned up on time...any number of things could have come up. But there was always the possibility that he really were in trouble.
She picked up the portable phone behind the bar and paced up and down as she dialled his number. If he was driving he wouldn't be able to answer straightaway but he would be able to get back to her when he next stopped.
The phone didn't even ring, simply going straight to the answer machine and Tifa hung up without leaving a message, her heart pounding even harder. Maybe his battery was dead or he was in a tunnel...once again there were lots of reasons why his phone wouldn't ring but Tifa couldn't help but imagine the worst. What if he were lying out there somewhere injured while she did nothing?
She slammed her fist into the top of the bar in frustration, then cursed as the wood cracked. She would have to fix it yet again. She had had to have it fixed so many times already that she had installed a punch bag at one end of the bar. It had always been easier to direct her temper than try to quash it.
About Cloud...what could she do? Tifa knew that she couldn't leave and search for him as she didn't have the slightest clue where to begin. Theoretically, all of his jobs should be listed in the book he kept in his room, but in practice she knew he rarely wrote down his clients' details. Trying to find him would be next to impossible...besides the fact that she wouldn't feel comfortable leaving the kids in the house on their own.
The door banged open once again and Tifa spun to face it, only for a group of construction workers to stroll in, already rambunctious from post-work drinks at another bar. She took their orders automatically but she really wanted to leave and look for Cloud...at least that way she would be doing something instead of just waiting around.
She dialled his number again with the same result and this time left a message.
She felt so helpless and weak and useless. She punctuated each word with a fist driving into the punchbag, not caring who saw her. The construction workers went silent, then began to whisper nervously, but they were too drunk to remain serious for long.
As the evening went on Tifa's temper rose steadily, until she was so desperate to do something that she was finding it difficult to think about anything else. Where was Cloud? Didn't he realise that he had responsibilities to his family and that they would be worrying about him right now? Idiot!
That was accompanied with a vicious kick, and Tifa dialled the number once more.
"You have reached Strife Delivery Services..."
Tifa almost screamed in frustration, and the phone was a breath away from being smashed into a million pieces when it was plucked from her grasp.
"Don't go taking your anger out on the phone now....I don't think you can afford to replace the bar top and your phone, can you?"
"Reno..." Tifa spun round, a warning tone in her voice, "I'm not in the mood right now"
Reno backed off slightly, his hands in front of his chest in a placating gesture.
"Okay, okay, I just noticed you looking a little upset and though you might need a friend"
Tifa glared at him, "If you're not drinking something leave!"
Rude appeared from behind Reno holding up two fingers, "Just two beers"
Reno sniggered as he took a stool, "Whoa, what did soldier boy do this time?"
Tifa slammed his glass down so hard that the bottom cracked and Reno finally took the hint.
"I was only asking..."
"Don't"
Tifa stalked into the back room and slumped down on the office chair. What was wrong with her? Two weeks with no word from Cloud and she was going insane.
Just a moment ago she had been ready to commit murder and now she felt like crying. Now would be the perfect moment for her knight in shining armour to turn up and make everything alright...but it was her 'hero' who was causing the problem right now.
Tifa sighed deeply and glanced once again at her watch. Just a few hours to go and this horrible waiting day would be over.
The rest of her shift went as if it were a dream...one long and unpleasant dream, but finally it was over and she was able to close the door behind the final customer. She vaguely remembered Reno saying something as he and Rude left but she couldn't remember what...they had seemed concerned about her but if Tifa had said anything the floodgates would have opened and somebody would have got hurt. It was easier to keep everything inside.
Her back ached from standing all evening and the last thing she felt like doing was cleaning but it needed to be done. She stooped under a table to brush up some broken glass – she couldn't risk Marlene or Denzel stepping on it in the morning. Her thoughts were disjointed by tiredness...she needed to sleep.
Tifa took one last look at the room before turning the lights out and going upstairs, then checked her watch once more.
3am...exactly 12 hours since Cloud had promised to be home and there was still no sign of him.
She had been intending to go straight to bed but Tifa paused outside Cloud's room with an impossible hope that somehow he had sneaked past her and she would see him sleeping there. But the room was empty and cold, just as it had been for so many nights.
Tifa sat at the desk and picked up their family photograph once more...was it too much to hope for that they could be a real family? Couldn't people who had lost their blood relatives start a new family of their own and therein find peace?
Still carrying the photograph Tifa walked towards the bed and smoothed the already-perfect sheets. It looked as if nobody had ever slept there, but she could catch the faint scent of Cloud's skin on them. Tifa buried her face in the pillow and inhaled deeply, before letting out the tears that had been threatening to fall all day. Her last coherent though was of Cloud.
Cloud stepped inside and closed the door behind him as quietly as he could. The click of the lock sliding into place sounded thunderous in the silence of the sleeping house. The only noise was the ticking of the clock in the corner; it was obvious that everyone was already in bed.
His journey upstairs seemed to take forever, as he paused with every creak in case he woke anyone. Cloud's limbs were shaking with exhaustion and his skin was grey from the combined grime of a few hard days on the road. It had not been an easy delivery as proved by the congealed blood dried onto his clothes from wounds he had accumulated. He inhaled deeply, the familiar scent of Seventh Heaven. It was so good to be home.
He set his bags outside the door and first went in to check on Denzel and Marlene, as was his habit. Cloud smiled to see them sleeping peacefully and laid a gentle hand to each warm cheek as a way to reassure himself that they really were okay.
His next stop was Tifa's room and he was even quieter, knowing that she would wake if he made even the slightest noise. Her door swung open silently to reveal an empty bed and Cloud frowned. Where was she?
She hadn't been downstairs either and he was sure she wouldn't willingly leave the children on their own. He entered the room cautiously, half-expecting her to appear from the shadows, eyes sparking in anger...from the last messages he had received before his phone's battery died he was fairly sure that Tifa wasn't very happy with his disappearing act. Rightly so, even Cloud had to admit. If she were to disappear like that he wouldn't be happy..as proven by the fact that her absence now was already making him consider the worst possible scenarios. Where else could she be?
He pulled the door closed behind him and crossed the hall to his room...before even opening the door he could hear someone breathing within so he wasn't as surprised as he might otherwise have been when he saw Tifa asleep on his bed. She was embracing his pillow, the photograph from his desk next to her face and her legs tangled in the bedsheet. Cloud moved closer cautiously and lowered his weight onto the mattress beside her. It felt like forever since he had last seen her and he felt the urge to touch her, reassure himself that she was real.
He reached his fingers towards her cheek, just like he had with Denzel and Marlene, but stopped short when the light caught the dried tear tracks down her face. Had she been crying because of him?
Cloud's guilt sat on him, as heavy as a physical weight. Even after all this time he still managed to hurt the people close to him. Tifa stirred in her sleep and Cloud froze, then stood up and headed for the door. He would have a shower and then catch some sleep on the sofa...it was just good to be home. He liked having a home to come back too; he liked the word home itself and knowing that the people he loved would always be there.
Cloud flinched as he pulled his t-shirt away from the wound in his side – the blood had congealed around it so it began to bleed anew when he removed the cloth. He cursed, then shrugged and stepped into the shower. It wasn't serious so he ignored it, turning the pressure up full blast to get rid of all traces of the road dust from his skin. The only shampoo in the shower was Tifa's so he used it, too tired to care about smelling like a girl. The smell of Tifa's hair was the true smell of home, but he still couldn't explain what that truly meant to him. It was just a fact.
He went back to his room to get some gauze and medical tape to cover his wound. They were in the top drawer of his bedside cabinet so his face was close to Tifa's when her eyelids fluttered and opened.
For a second there was silence as the two stared at each other and Tifa blinked as if she couldn't believe what she was seeing.
"Cloud..."
her whisper fell into the silence and he could only nod.
In a quick movement she sat up and flung her arms around him. Cloud was too startled at her display of affection to say anything, but his arms came hesitantly around her too.
"Cloud" Tifa's voice was muffled as she spoke into his shoulder and he could feel her breath against his bare skin, "Welcome back."
Cloud's lips twitched upwards slightly in what was almost a smile as he finally relaxed for the first time in weeks in her embrace.
"I'm home"
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Author's notes: Thanks for reading everyone and please let me know what you thought!
^_^
Chrikaru
