A/N: I'm writing this for Writting2StaySane's Beatles challenge. The song I picked was Eleanor Rigby. I chose to retell it in a way.
I don't own anything from the world of Harry Potter. You have JK Rowling to thank for that.
"Disgusting," thought McGonagall as she carefully skirted around the hallway. Sewage had backed up and spilled out from under the door to the girl's bathroom. Inside she could hear Peeves and Moaning Myrtle laughing together. The two had struck up somewhat of a friendship, with Peeves causing all sort of mischief for Myrtle's amusement.
She strode towards Filch's quarters. Normally he was very good about keeping up with all the cleaning, albeit with a bad attitude and some choice words towards any offenders he might catch, Peeves being a favorite target. It wasn't like him to not come to the mess, mop in hand muttering under his breath.
"Argus!" she snapped, rapping smartly on his door.
No reply came.
"Argus?" she asked, knocking again. This time the door opened slightly. She slowly pushed her way into the dark room. Mrs. Norris' eyes glowed with the light from the hallway momentarily. Minerva waved her wand and light flooded the room.
Filch's body laid on his bad, stiff, a scowl permanently painted across his face. Mrs. Norris' body was draped across her former masters, and she barely lifted her head as Minerva approached. McGonagall didn't need to say a word, she knew exactly what happened. It was summer, all the other staff had vacated Hogwarts.
Sighing Minerva shooed Mrs. Norris off Filch's body, and the cat lightly jumped onto the floor and watched her intently. Carefully McGonagall wrapped the body in the sheet it was resting on. There was no point in returning to her office to look for Filch's next of kin, the closest thing to it was sitting next to her on the floor. Nor would there be point to waste time looking for people to show up, no one would truly mourn his passing.
A wave of her wand and a stretcher appeared. She used her wand to gently place Filch on the stretcher. Mrs. Norris seemed to nod in approval. Minerva carefully moved the body through the castle and out onto the grounds. She turned away from Dumbledore's grave and made for a secluded spot on the edge of the Forbidden Forest, behind a large boulder, Mrs. Norris trailing faithfully behind. She placed the body onto the ground and started carving a tomb out of the large boulder. Mrs. Norris rested on Filch and watched her. It was slow work, each move calculated and precise. The sun went from over head to touching the horizon by the time she finished the job.
As if she knew it was time Mrs. Norris silently vacated her post atop Filtch and slowly, head hanging, went to sit next to the tomb. Minerva carefully maneuvered Filch into his final resting place. Slowly the cover to the simple tomb slid across, sealing his body inside. Across the top she had emblazoned Argus' name, birth date, and death date, and had written 'Faithful Servant of Hogwarts'.
She stood, looking at the tomb for a few moments, unsure of what to do next. Part of it felt wrong. Standing in view of the white marble tomb where Dumbledore had, just a few years earlier, been buried with full honors and extravagance, people pouring in from near and far to weep over their loss. Here Filch, who had seen so many students pass through the large doors, who had put in his work with sweat instead of knowledge, was being buried by a single colleague and his most loyal, nay only, friend.
She sighed heavily as the sun disappeared and the grounds fell into darkness. Mrs. Norris jumped lightly from the ground to the top of the tomb, where she settled across Filch's name.
"Goodbye, Argus," Minerva said, her eyes watering slightly, but no tears could come. "Thanks for everything." The corners of her mouth flickered upwards, and she left the inseparable pair together as she made her way back towards the castle.
This is a one-shot, but I'd still be appreciative of any reviews.