I've known Isabella, or Bella which she preferred, since before I could remember. She was my best friend, and my secret love. And I still remember the day I realized I was shamelessly in love, bright as the sun, like it was just yesterday.
And here's how the story goes:
"Jasper! Jasper!" she shrieked with excitement, waving her hand in the air. I stood from the bench that was set in her manor's garden, to open my arms to her for a hug as I smiled widely. She grabbed her skirts in one fist full, the other one extended in the air with a leather bound book grasped in it as she ran as fast as she could.
She had grown a significant amount over the three months of the summer. Her Aunt Murley who owned estates in various counties in Europe graciously offered to ship her over for extensive tutoring before her studies could start back up again in the fall. Of course I was worried for her; who knows what can happen on a ship with a three day voyage ahead of it. There is decease, and murderers. But as I offered my thoughts to her the day before she left, she swatted me playfully and said, "Jasper, darling. It is one of the better ships; please keep in mind my dear Aunt's fortune. I think she can afford for one little woman to make her voyage across the Atlantic on a well furnished, well sterilized, and well guarded ship." I mumbled lowly in a small protest, but offered no further advancements.
Now she ran fiercely towards me, her face holding determination as not to trip and hurt her poor self again. But it worked to no prevail. In less then enough time she was tumbling forward. As she ran, her left foot caught ever so graciously onto the front of her petty coat, causing her right foot hit the back of her heal, giving the foot no chance to save her. Both of her arms flew protectively out in front of her, trying so desperately to catch her fall. The new, beautiful book went hurtling into the air, landing in a pile of gravel skidding just a bit before its stop.
She shrieked again, but not in excitement. Her eyes were wide, and her mouth was stretched far open. But I was quick and only a few steps away. I grabbed the back of her petty coat with one hand, and her bodice with the other, stopping her a moment before her face would collide with the ground she became oh so familiar with over her seventeen years of living.
I chuckled momentarily as I grabbed her arm, and helped her up. I brushed the bottom of her skirts off for her, as she got her upper half. I looked up from my kneeling place, seeing her face puff and turn a magnificent ruby red.
"Oh, please forgive my clumsiness, dear brother (a/n: not her actual brother. That's what the called boys in the nineteenth and early twentieth century if they were close), I was just in a rush to see you, for I've missed you all this time. I mean, tell me, how could I go without my dearest friend for three whole months! Oh, it was agony dear Jasper, pure agony." she blubbered still not taking the time to look to me.
As I stood up I took in her whole appearance. Bella was never very much one of the girls. Instead of raving over the latest dress in fashion, and the most proper bow, she would read, or play stick ball with me and the boys. That is what I adored most about her. But now she stood at least two inches taller, a lovely pink silk gown on, and her hair up in rollers with a day hat, and a pink satin ribbon securing the hats place on her head, tied ever so tightly under her chin. She had darker pink high heels that I could see while I was kneeling laced almost to the middle of her calf.
She used to wear dirty old house dressed to play her sports, and old dirty brown common-worker shoes. To have dirt under her finger nails, or a scuff on her high-heels never once put a frown on her small childish face.
But ah, that also was the difference. Her once round face was now a delicate heart shape; her once childish wide eyes were more soothing and settled with wisdom. Her dull hair before was a stunning chocolate brown , and her figure had filled out perfectly, adding gentle but more definite sloops to her hips –readying itself for childbearing I presumed-, and her waist thinned itself out from it's earlier chubbiness. Her breast swelled to noticeable size, and her shoulders had broadened with pride.
I couldn't stop my eyes from skimming more then once before she could notice I was finished. But as she looked up, I directed my attention to her eyes. Oh, how their brown grew a shade lighter, growing deeper and more soulful. I felt my breath hitch.
"Well, Jasper dear boy, give me a hug!" she opened her arms, a wide grin spreading across her features. That's when I noticed that her lips also filled out more, and her face became more slender. She stunned me.
I quickly wrapped my arms under hers, pressing my face into the crooked of her neck, burying my face into the loose curls that fell from their rollers. "Oh, you look stunning, my dear Isabella."
"And I must inquire it also for you. My dear boy, you have chance such a significant amount!" Her arms wrapped tighter around my neck, pulling me down further.
I chuckled and drew my head back, but still not loosening my hold around her waist, "And how so have I changed?" I grinned down at her.
"My boy! You have grown at least a foot taller then me. You're shoulders are more pronounced and proud, your neck has certainly thickened out, and you're waist has grown! My boy!" she repeated, "You are no longer a boy! You are now a man," she beamed up at me.
"Oh, but before I was nothing more the, a small stick with taffy at the end to emphasize my head?" I questioned jokingly.
She rolled her forehead across my chest, muffling her laugh. "Well, you also have changed," I pointed out.
"And how would that be?" but it seemed she already had an ounce of an idea as she had a knowing expression.
"Well, Isabella, you have too grown, but only by a couple of inches. You're fashion sense has improved, and your figure has perfectly filled itself out. You're face has balanced itself out, and you're eyes have become deeper," I said without an ounce of shame, beings as since we could speak, we've only let truth be uttered to one another.
But I saw her face twist a bit with pain, but she quickly rushed (yes, rushed) it off, "So Jasper, you're telling me I was nothing but a dog-faced bodiless tomboy?"
"N-no," I suddenly stuttered, and I tried desperately to explain, "I- I didn't mean it in anyway li-"
"Shush," she smiled putting her pointer finger to my lips. "I was only playing a cruel joke," she chuckled softly.
"Oh thank you, Miss. Isabella," I said in mock pain. I walked to the book she had clumsily dropped and inspected it before extending my arm out to her to hand it back.
"Oh no, dearest friend," she put her hands up, "that is for you. It is a gift from Italy. I know how much you love to read, and the foreign motherland's." she smiled shyly.
"Well, sweetheart, I must thank you," I bent at the waist, mock bowing to make light of the situation.
I saw her face grow red for an instant before turning on her heels, and saying, "Well, we must be hurrying, I must go and great Mama and Papa." after I lingered behind for a quick second, she turned sharply and added in more of a command, "Well, are you coming?" Europe didn't seem to only alter her appearance, but also her personality.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
After she greeted her parents, and I was invited to stay for supper, I watched her every move. I watched her as she commanded the house servants around without remorse, and talked to her parents with more authority then before. I watched as she stuck her chin in the air, and paid little to no attention to her once close friend, Mrs. Abdrey, the house servant that she used to giggle and talk so vigorously with through out her times left in their home.
I watched her, noting how she had altered so very much. How she seemed so much more selfish, and self-centered, I noticed and I felt my heart break little by little. I always viewed her as nothing more then a sister, but it affected more so then a brother would be. I was effected as a close friend; a husband; a lover, when he sees the love of his life die away. When I said good-bye before leaving for home, I didn't bother making it elaborate by hugging her and telling her how I'd miss her while we were apart like I had always done. After I said good-bye, I walked down the gravel walk way to the gate, thinking too much of how Bella, my closest friend, had betrayed and abandoned herself.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
I didn't go over the next day, or the day after that. I told myself it was because I was too busy, but I knew subconsciously that it was because I missed who she was, and I wasn't warming up to the idea of getting to know the new her.
I didn't make any advancement to see her, I didn't even ask about her around our small Texan town when I was out at the market or boutique, but she was the one to make the advancement at restoring our friendship that was on hold for three months, and longer, due to her sudden change.
It had been a week or so when I was sitting in the drawing room, reading the leather bound book Bella gave me about Italy's history. She knew me all to well and my fascination with historical events. The door man of the apartments my family and I were residing in called on me, telling the maidservant that I had a visitor.
Her Irish accent laid on thick as she rushed up, her eyes wide with worry, "Mrs. McMenamin, what it is? Tell me. Tell me now." I took a hold of her shoulders and shook her as she couldn't get one coherent sentence out, just saying 'visitor' repetitively. As I got frustrated I just brushed past her and headed for the door. And what I saw broke my heart more then Bella's altered personality ever could.
It was pouring rain this exact night, leaving out town in hopes to end the pending drought. Bella was standing at the front of the door, right off of the curb, her shoulders shaking. She was dressed in her usual attire that I always remembered and loved. Her dingy tan house dress, with a darker brown apron tied around her waist. Her hair was pulled back with an old cloth bow, and even through the dark rain I could make out her tears and red swollen face.
I rushed out to her, putting my arm around her shoulder quickly leading her inside. She stumbled momentarily on the door jam as I felt her body heave and convulse. "Bella, Bella, sweetheart, what is it?" I asked half frantic, turning towards her, gripping her shoulders.
She didn't answer for a moment, staring at me as her face crumbled. "Bella, darling, you have to say something, anything." I said on the verge of becoming completely frantic.
"I-I- you…" she started to sob, and I felt my heart fall as I felt her pain, without even having a reason.
"My love-" I stopped myself before I could say anymore, "My dear, you have to talk in complete sentences. Please, just tell me what is the matter."
"I-I thought" she had to catch her breath, and I could tell by the determination on her face, along with the pain, that she was going to bear her complete soul to me. "I thought that if I changed over in Europe, if I became different you would fall in love with me like I had fallen in love with you too many years back," she cried out, letting her face fall into her hands.
"And what makes you think a man would not fall in love with a woman such as your true self?" I asked, to frightened to say what was taking control of my mind.
"Because every girl I have seen you chase after since we were thirteen was a girl of great beauty and authority. One who was completely confident in herself and the orders she barked. The kind that shops at French boutiques and stores I will never be able to afford. That is the woman you love." she was becoming hysterical.
I collected her in a hug and held her close to my chest, "Oh, my dearest Isabella. You are sadly mistaken. I have fallen in love with the woman you have presented yourself as tonight." I said in a whisper, my heart pounding and my mind racing.
She pushed back, "Oh Jasper Whitlock you are only saying that so I will stop sobbing into your chest; ruining your shirt."
This is when I pulled her back at arm's length and looked directly into her eyes, "My lady, I would not lie to mend your heart. I may not have been conscience of it this whole time, but I'm certain I've been in love with you since the womb. I will one day make you my bride, my wife, my lover and my child's mother." I felt my confidence rising.
"You do mean that, don't you Jasper," she didn't say in a question.
"I do, love, I do." I pulled her face to mine, and kissed her hard. I wasn't going to let her go this time, and I vowed on it. I would be damned if I let her become that monster again, or if I'd let any type of monster take her.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
I kneeled at Isabella's grave, feeling the old grief come on once again. She died of a heart decease before we could conceive any children, only two years after we wed on her 18th birthday, the same year that I was forever changed; forced to live in a paused state, never again to be reunited with the woman I first fell in love with.
Alice put her hand on my shoulder, understanding of my still alive love for Isabella. "I think it's time to go," she worded my thoughts as it started to bear too much influence on my emotions.
As we walked away, she mentioned something that caught my attention, "So, I had a vision of a new girl joining our clan." she beamed.
"Oh?" I pushed, only vaguely interested. "When?"
"Well," she looked confused, "We're meeting her today, in school, but she won't actually be joining us for a few years," I caught onto her implication.
"Ah, human," I smirked. "Who's going to be changing her?"
"Edward," she said, biting at her nail, though futile, but I learned it was just a habit from when she was human, "The whole love thing finally happens with him," she tried to make light of the situation, but I could detect the excitement in her voice, along with it rolling off of her since we started the conversation.
"So, what's her name?" I asked, looking down at my shoes.
"Isabella, well Bella. Bella Swan," she smiled. She never knew the name of my first wife, and she never tried to pry, knowing how it pained me.
I felt my breath hitch as my stomach suddenly became a hole. Was time always this deceiving?
To be honest, I wanted to do Emmett, because he's always been my favorite, but I noticed; during Emmett's human life, they didn't were petty coats….
But anyway, enjoy and review. And I know, there will be some errors, but as of the moment, I don't have time to reread, the cause: having to go out with my sister's, and I want to get this up as soon as possible.
Thank you so much!!