Aight bitches and hoes. I've got a story for you. It's not the first one I have written I must say..but it is the first one I have ever published. Don't be hateful or I'll devour the flesh of your unborn child. *ahem* very well.

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Dan and/or Phil..if I did I sure as hell wouldn't be writing sketchy stories about them now would I?

Right well use my story if you like it or whatever, just credit me in some way shape or form, yeah?

Okay, here we go! But remember to keep your hands and feet inside the ride at all times. or don't, I don't really care *jumps back into the computer*

Oh before you go..here! *hands you a cookie* it's for the ride..I mean come on..you've made it this far! *winks* Now hold on tight..this is going to be a bumpy ride! also it isn't phan...but it should be pretty good regardless. by the way any character who is alike any person irl in any way shape or form was entirely coincidental considering Charlotte L. Kelly was a name I thought of myself. and she is totally an oc..enjoy le story you little baby llamas c:

*and cue transition to story*

I wanted to kill myself.

Dan didn't like that idea.

He walked in right before I swallowed the pills.

Made me spit them out.

Took the blades from my hand before I made the fatal cut.

Pulled me down from the balcony before I jumped.

Untied the noose before I kicked it from beneath me.

Pulled the gun from my mouth before I shot my brains out.

Hell.

I tried everything.

But he's stubborn.

So was I.

I didn't want to live.

My name is Charlotte L. Kelly and this is my story.

"Now..you'd think as someone who just had their ass saved you would be a little more grateful" Of freaking course Dan was there JUST IN TIME to freaking pull me up out of the water, and once again force me to live another day.

"Yeah. Ever think I don't want to anymore?" I gasped out. I didn't want to..although I kind of liked the thought that every time I tried something he was there to prevent me from doing it..I just liked seeing how far I could go before he would snap and just let me do it..he was close this time. Maybe next time.

"God..maybe next time I won't be to help you. This has gone on too long. You know you just like-like me. Admit it."*Dan winks* Can one person be any more annoying?

"Gross." Okay maybe I did a little..

"Yeah whatever. I see the way you look at me." Wait what? No. He couldn't…I've never looked at him any differently!

"Yeah okay sure! Now while you're bathing in your pool of narcissism, I'm going to dry off and have a freaking snack or something. Freaking egotistic twat." I wasn't even that hungry.

And then he freaking laughed. God that laugh..I swear my heart stops every time he laughs..he just sounds so innocent and pure..as if nothing in the world could hurt him. I was glad I wasn't facing him..He might have seen the blush creep onto my cheeks and make me feel alive. Out of all the times he has saved me from like..killing myself..I never could. Even if he hadn't been there to stop me. I was physically unable to do it. I don't know if I was just too much of a coward, but I was glad Dan had saved me. I doubt I could have gone through with it really. Of course I would never admit that simple little fact to him. I opened the cupboard and rummaged through the assorted unhealthy stash of junk food I had in there hoping for oreos. But they were gone. Bummer. I settled on some type of crisp. Bleh. I plopped down at my computer and deleted the goodbye letter. Ah well. Right then Phil walked in and smiled at me. Phil I can tolerate. He is a sweetheart and never questions when I stay here for longer than a few days at a time. He knows how hard I have it at home. However, Mr. Howell makes me talk about my problems. He means well though. I mean. He has saved my life more than once, and has never told Phil about it. Bless his heart. My phone buzzes knocking me out of my trance-ish-like state and Phil tosses it to me as it's on the other side of the couch. It was from Dan.

Seriously child. I don't understand how you can be so normal after just trying to MURDER yourself. I think you're like mental or something..:D

I replied after I chuckled from his weirdness.

OH COME ON. It was totally not murder. It was...me trying to take a forever nap, you never let me finish though. But uh..I don' t think that I..uh. nevermind x.x

I sent the message and set my phone down to the left of me. After just a moment it buzzes again.

You don't think what? Well crap.

I don't uh..think I COULD. Meep..

At that moment he appears in the livingroom and says "Goooood morning guys! Lovely day right?"

"You could say that I guess" I said the same time Phil murmured softly "It's almost three in the morning. Hardly actually morning!"

Dan smiles at him warmly, which causes my cheeks to flush pink. I look down quickly seemingly engulfed by something on my phone and see I have another text message. When I open it I see that it's from my egg doner. "Ugh of course she texts now. Bet she's freaking wasted and needs me to pick her up or some shit."

Hi baby. I've accidentliy had bit to much 2 ddrink. can u take me home please? love you so much ~Mommy

Sure. Where are you exactly? I'll take you home and get you something to eat. Then back to my friends once you're situated okay?

I'm at the pub I xalways gso 2 babidoll! but y dont u syay with me a this time? miss u

Uhh..mom I don't think that is a good idea. Sorry.

No its ok i get it. you dont want 2 be around us anymore you hate us. you r 17, not old enoug to live alone yet

Mom. I'm fine.

I'm going 2 bring dad into this

No that's okay. I'll come over :) I'll make you tea and we can watch movies! Okay?

God her mom was annoying. All the time. And extremely bipolar..but her dad was the worst he was probably pissed off..and drunk. Never a good combination. He was extremely abusive.

"My mom just texted that she needs a ride home. I'll be right back guys."

Then Dan chimed in "Don't be ridiculous, I'm going with you!"

Then Phil chimed in "Yeah, he should go with you. You really shouldn't be alone at 3 in the morning."

Then Mom chimed in k lov u

Then I shrugged and grabbed my keys. Not even looking behind me to see if Dan was coming. I knew he was. I slipped my shoes on and opening the door regretting not bringing a jacket. It was kind of chilly and my hair was still damp. Dan shuts the door behind us and bumps me with his hip getting my attention. I look at him and he tosses my jacket at me. I gratefully put it on and mutter what I think is a thank you. I climb into my dark purple Suzuki Forenza and unlocking it so Dan could climb in. I start the car and buckle up. I glance up at Dan and smile halfheartedly. I pull out and start heading to where my mom is. It worries me that I worry about her. I toss my phone into Dans' lap.

"Oh that reminds me! Text my mom and say that I'm bringing a guy friend because I didn't want to be out alone this late at night. Please. Don't want to freak her out ya know?"

Then Dan looked at me and smiled his dimpled smile at me and began typing away. I'm glad he wasn't looking at me because for the third time today my cheeks seemed stained a pinkish color because of that smile.

And there you have it folks! We have reached the end of Chapter 1! If you've enjoyed the ride, please tip our chauffeur Liam. He's a great guy..great guy. And as we have reached the end of our journey so far...I would appreciate it if you would leave a review as you leave. For your convenience I have left some sample reviews for you to copy paste.

"Come on now. This story isn't even good. Just quit while you're ahead."

"I noticed some grammatical errors (include word as it is and the correct spelling and or punctuation here) and by the way you suck."

"Wait..I don't even understand what's happening. How did I end up on this ride? Do I have to pay?"

"Not as bad as I thought"

and my personal favorite

"OMG I LOVE THIS STORY SO MUCH ASDFJKL; PLS CONTINUE OMG *faints* I NEED YOU TO FINISH IT OR ILL DIIIIEEEEEE DFJDSJF DSJFDKSA JFDKLS FJDKSL FJDKLASJFDKLSA FJDLKAS By the way thank you for the cookie. It tasted very nice."

And on that note I would like to bid thee farewell until tomorrow because I stayed up all night gathering the courage to write and post this and now it is 9 am and I feel as though I should at least try to get a little sleep.