Summary: His life is what it is, but he can't help but feel like something is missing.
Reckless
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Jasper's had his first tattoo sketched out since the day he was old enough to realize that the markings were a choice instead of something that bloomed onto your skin when you did something brave, as he once believed in elementary school. It's the petal of an orchid — his Ma's favorite — with her initials and birth date scrawled across the center of it. He practices nonchalance in the mirror so that his friends will believe he made up the design on the spot.
But his fifteenth birthday falls just one month after his mom's suicide, and even looking at the sketch brings tears to his eyes. He brushes them away defiantly, and in the sanctity of his room, crumples the paper into a tiny little ball and drops it into the wastebasket. When it comes time for his first ink, he lets Peter tattoo some vaguely tribal-looking pattern with no meaning into his upper arm. His friends let out a whoop of triumph, but Jasper only nods along numbly.
There's a party down at the abandoned warehouse. He gets to tap the keg and is poured the first drink, but other than that it's no different than a thousand other parties that have come before and a thousand others that will surely come afterwards. Some of his friends congratulate him, but the older boys just shrug because he's only one in a long line.
Bella approaches him as the fire is beginning to die out because everyone is too drunk to bother throwing on any more wood. Her stride is wobbling and her eyes are wide and bright with alcohol.
"How does it feel?" she asks breathlessly, running her fingers across the skin. It hurt badly. It hurts even more now that the gentle pressure of her thumb is causing the bandage to press against the raw wound, and he really, really wishes he had gotten something other than a lame, generic design that sort of looked cool at the moment.
He doesn't say any of this to her. What he says, with a shrug, is, "It is what it is." It sounds ridiculous to his ears, but Bella eats it right up as if he's just quoted Confucius. The alcohol has made him brazen, and he trails a hand along her waist. "Wanna get outta here?" he asks. Bella nods eagerly.
There's really nowhere to go, considering that neither of them are old enough to drive and those that are, are in no condition to do so. So they follow the grand tradition of their predecessors and find a little niche along the trees that leaves them mostly out-of-sight. Bella is tiny, the top of her head only coming to Jasper's chest, and he has to bend down at a slightly awkward angle to kiss her. But it's worth it — Bella is an excellent kisser. Jasper grows hard quite quickly as they grind against each other in the dark, her tongue warm and wet and inviting. He slides a hand up her dress to find that her inner lips are in a similar state. There is no barrier of underwear. Bella wiggles at the touch of his hand.
"Do you have something?" she whispers in his ear. Jasper smirks. There's a condom in his wallet given to him by Garrett that he's all too ready to use, and he pulls it out to show to her. Bella unbuckles his belt and lowers his pants and boxers to his knees. Jasper readies himself to open the wrapper, but her mouth closes around the head of his cock, rendering him speechless. She gives him several long, slow licks, tracing up and down the length of him. Then she takes him between her lips and slides him all the way in. One hand fists around the base of him, moving in counterpoint to the slide of her mouth. It's exquisite torture, the slow build-up that burns inside of him, exploding out like a burst of stars behind his eyes. Bella swallows every drop, fingers clutching his ass tightly. He pants heavily, grateful to have the tree behind him to lean on. Bella rises to her feet, sucking gently at his collarbone.
"Your turn," she says with a grin. Jasper smirks and kisses her in response, but they never get to finish their evening because Bella's brother, Emmett, can be heard calling her name. Jasper hastily re-dresses himself and Bella hurries off towards the sound of Emmett's voice. Everyone knows that everyone else is having sex, but the unwritten rule is that you don't get caught, especially not by a family member.
He passes out by the fire. His body is limp and sated, but even with one orgasm under his belt that evening he can't help but feel like something is missing.