A/N: So I had this random idea back in 2013 when I first played Metal Gear Rising. It bothered me from the back of my mind for days, so I had to write it down.

The point is simply to put Raiden in awkward and strange situations along with the members of the Winds of Destruction: Monsoon, Mistral, Sam and Sundowner. They can be daily situations going wrong or awkward, or plain absurd scenarios. This fanfic is literally just for the giggles of the ones who can find humor on it, or for people to frown and stare at it for how stupid it is. You can choose.

Remember, this fanfic is random on purpose, so OOCiness is bound to show. But that really doesn't matter, at least to me. Hope this amuses you, somehow. Enjoy.

[Crackfic/Spooffic]

Pairing/couple: none

Rating: T (13+)

Genre: Humor / Friendship

~Friends of Destruction~

Prologue...

Dok felt he needed to do something.

After the mission was done, Raiden had come back, he had his artificial skin body back, and went to his home in the U.S. He was physically alright, but his mental state was clearly unstable. He needed someone to be by his side, but unfortunately Rose and little John were unable to be back by the same time. Some minor terrorist attack had happened in New Zealand and the country was completely blocked: no one could leave, no one could enter. They were alright, but they couldn't be by Raiden's side now that he needed them, and they had no idea when they would be able to come back.

So Raiden needed friends. Friends that could be there anytime he needed. But Otacon and Sunny were always busy, and so were Courtney and Kevin, and obviously Boris, they had work to do. They couldn't be babysitting a grown man. But Dok knew he needed someone. He himself couldn't be there for him either, he too had too much to do.

Dok sighed. He wanted to help Raiden, he sincerely did, but he couldn't think of anything. Wolf wouldn't help either, as any other AI wouldn't, since they didn't really have that sensitive side Raiden needed from a friend.

While Dok was lost in his thoughts, suddenly his phone started to ring.

- Hello?

- Good morning, Doktor, it's Boris.

- Oh, Boris. What's happened, you don't usually call me. It's something serious, I suppose?

- Well, kind of. I would've called Raiden to talk about this, but considering his present condition... I'd rather discuss this with you, first.

- Why, what is it?

- We've found something big. World Marshall and Desperado have indeed been shut down, but we found out the Winds of Destruction were AIs. Those guys Raiden fought, they were no cyborgs. They were AIs.

- Oh, interesting... But what about it?

- Hm, how do I put it? Those were AIs behind the real cyborgs... The Winds of Destruction are actually still alive.

- What?!

- Yes, and we have them under our custody. We were afraid they could be scheming something, so I had them brought here. What's most curious is that they seem like no threat at all, and actually I think they made it on purpose to be found. It's like Monsoon, Mistral and Sundowner were actually looking for help.

- Help for what? What do they want?

- Wait, there's more. Samuel Rodrigues was not dead either. We found him. Actually, he found us.

- What?

- Dok, they want to work for us. But the thing is, I still don't know if they can be trusted. I couldn't turn them down just like that, but still I don't know what to do. So I thought I'd just let you know.

- Yes, I see...

- I thought I could just let them on some paperwork for now or something...

- Boris! I know what to do! Would you mind sending them to me?

- Well, if you have an idea... that would help a lot. What is it?

- I think I have the perfect job for them...

And that's how the Winds of Destruction became Raiden's Friends of Destruction.