Fun Things From The Evidence Locker.
"Oh my god Dee!" Ryo frantically looked around the room in panic making sure no one was around, even though he knew full well it was only him and Dee in the apartment.
"Where did you get that?" Ryo asked curiously. Dee only giggled evilly and said, "I won it in a card game with that freaky guy from the evidence locker."
"But, Dee…We can't do that, can we?" Ryo asked in a scared, curious voice.
"Well, Ummm, not really but… Well, of course we can!"
Dee giggled in excitement and continued doing…something on the coffee table.
Ryo watched in curiosity, slowly crawling off the couch and on to the floor to get a closer look at what Dee was, Ummmm…doing on the coffee table.
"How do you know how to do that Dee?"
Dee stopped for a second, he turned looking to his partner with an eyebrow cocked up in curiosity and said, "Wait a minute, have you ever done this before Ryo?"
"Ummm… No."
"What! You mean you never did it when you were a teen-ager or anything?"
"Nope, did you?"
Dee smiled and turned back to what he was…doing on the coffee table. "Yeah", Dee said, "I did it a couple of times back in the day when I was younger."
"Yeah but Dee, that was a long time ago, we can't do this. What if someone finds out?"
"Oh! And who's gonna find out?" Dee said laughing, "look around Ryo were the only ones here, and besides its just one."
"I don't know Dee…" Ryo gave his typical hesitant, I'm a wuss look.
"Awww come on Ryo, Bikky won't be home for a while, and it's not like anything bad will happen I swear."
"But Dee were cops, isn't this like against our morals or something?"
With out answering Dee leaned forward over the coffee table to lick the top of the small sheet of paper in his hands, then closing it tightly. Finally turning to Ryo with a small smile waving the…thing by its tip in the air, he said "Come on Ryo, what could one hurt?"
Five or so minutes later….
"I am so freaking hungry", Dee said as he got up off the couch walking toward the kitchen to rummage through Ryo's fridge.
"Oh my god, what was that noise!" Ryo said grabbing Dee before he had time to leave arm's distance off the couch. Dee only burst into laughter, giggling at Ryo's behavior.
"Its nothing Ryo, you're just hearing shit" he said laughing as he walked in to the kitchen.
"You didn't hear that?" Ryo asking in confusion, "it sounded like someone was on the roof". Ryo's eyes began peering up toward at the ceiling, nervously imagining someone wondering around on his roof for god knows what reason.
From the couch in the living room Ryo could hear Dee yelling out in laughter, "there's no one on the roof Ryo, quit tripping dude…" "Man Ryo you don't have shit to eat in here!"
Ryo giggled and called back, "yeah Bikky's gonna bring home some takeout after him and Carol get out of school."
"But Ryyyooooo," Dee whined from the kitchen, "I'm hungry now… hey what's this?"
Silence…..
"I think I found a Cheeto on the floor!" Dee exclaimed in amusement.
Ryo wasn't even listening to him, for all he new Dee could be talking about the secrets of life, he was once again focused on the noise he could swear he kept hearing from the roof. "You can't tell me you didn't hear that Dee? I swear there's something on the roof," Ryo said calling out to Dee.
Still in the kitchen and equally not listing to the other man Dee called back, "what do you think the shelf life of Cheeto's is Ryo? I wonder if I could still eat this?"
"Dee! Come here!" Ryo called out, he was getting nervous about the scurrying sound from the roof. "What?" Dee said as his head peered from around the wall in the kitchen. "Are you still talking about that damn noise?"
"You're not hearing this Dee?" Ryo said anxiously as he still looked at the ceiling from his seat on the couch, Dee just started laughing.
"Ryo your paranoid, chill out dude its just me and you here," with saying that Dee couldn't help but make a little wink at his partner, causing Ryo to blush slightly. Then Dee quickly popped his head back around the wall disappearing back in to the kitchen.
Ryo slowly began to calm himself, starring off in to the living room…He suddenly noticed a large amount of dust bunnies behind his TV, I'll have to clean that up later he thought.
"Ouch!" Dee screamed from the kitchen, which was then followed by a large crashing sound causing Ryo to jump in his seat on the couch.
"Dee? Are you all right?"
Ryo not being able to see into the kitchen from his seat, lend forward and said questioningly, "Dee???"
Silence………
"Deeeeee???" Ryo said slowly getting up from his chair, walking towards the kitchen.
"Blah!!!" Dee screamed jumping around the corner stopping only inches from Ryo's face.
"Ahhhh!!! God damn it Dee!!" Ryo screamed falling backwards to the ground landing on his ass.
"Ouch!" Ryo said as he grabbing his butt in pain.
Dee began to laugh uncontrollably, grabbing his stomach and falling to the ground next to Ryo,
Eventually rolling to his back laughing in a fit of hysterics.
"Well I'm glad your finding so much humor in this" Ryo said, glaring at Dee.
Dee rolled over to face Ryo, "Oh come on he said, that was funny."
Ryo's began to smile, yeah, it was pretty funny he said as he began to giggle.
Dee began to giggle as well for no really reason, which caused Ryo to being to laugh even louder. Suddenly the two of them found themselves' laughing hysterically, still sitting on the floor.
Finally with tears of laughter coming from there eyes and stitches in there stomachs from laughing, they managed to calm themselves down. Silence fell over them as they sat looking at each other. Dee slowly crawled up on all fours and began to inch toward Ryo looking at him with one of those looks.
"Dee?" Ryo said hesitantly, pulling himself back a little from the man crawling toward him. "What are you looking at me like that for?"
Dee quickly pounced like an annoying cat in heat onto Ryo, pining him to the ground. "Where did it hurt when you hit the ground" he said evilly, reaching a hand around to Ryo's posterior.
Ryo stared into Dee's eyes…and began to giggle, suddenly the giggle turned in to a burst of laughter and turned his face away from Dee trying to hide his obvious laughter.
"What!?" Dee said in annoyance, Ryo just continuing to giggle beneath him, "tell me, do I have something on my face or something?"
Dee gave a curious look at his partner and Ryo finally calmed himself turning his face back to Dee's still lightly giggling. "Your so damn corny Dee, you know that?"
Dee just laughed and then bent down in attempt to steal a passionate kiss. However as he did, Ryo burst into laughter again, shunning his face from Dee' for a second time.
"Ok that's it!" Dee said, and suddenly Ryo found himself forced in to a loving kiss, as he lay pined down to the floor underneath his lover.
As Dee pulled back ending the kiss, he looked at Ryo's still somewhat laughing face and said.
"I think I got the munchies…" this comment caused them both to giggle uncontrollably.
Suddenly! Bikky came bursting though the door with full sacks in his arms, screaming at the top of his lungs, "I'm home Ryo!! And I brought dinner with….me"
He slowly paused at the site of his foster father being smothered on the floor by his worst enemy, the pervert. "God you guys just don't quit do you?"
Dee just grinned up at the boy with Ryo quickly trying to wiggle his way out from underneath Dee's bodyweight Ryo panicky said, "Bikky your home early."
Bikky just rolled his eyes at the two men and proceeded to set the sacks on the dinner table before saying, "its Four Twenty Ryo, I always come home from school at Four Twenty, you know that."
Finally both Dee and Ryo crawled up from the floor, Dee immediately running to the sacks on the table to see what deliciousness Bikky may have brought home.
"Oh well I guess you do don't you," Ryo nervously said to Bikky.
"Chinese Food!!" Dee exclaimed excitedly form the sack with his head literary buried in it.
"Oh joy!" Ryo said in a strangely happy tone as he forgot everything going on and focused purely on the Chinese food, joyfully skipping towards it.
Bikky just rolled his eyes again, reaching up to a cabinet to get some plates for dinner. He then only jokingly said something in reply to both Dee and Ryo's strange behavior.
"You guys should really lay off the drugs dude…"
Suddenly Ryo and Dee raised their head from the food bags looking up in fear.
Bikky just stared at them with a bum look on his face before saying, "guys? I was just joking."
Silence………
"Hahahaha!! Yeah joking" Dee exclaimed joyfully as he nudged Ryo with his shoulder, "Yeah joking," Ryo said nervously.
Bnkky sat staring at the two men for a moment, doubting the many thoughts running though his head. "I'll just try and ignore that last comment" he thought to himself.
"I just can't leave these two alone can I?" He thought… "Damn homo stoners."
Author Notes I think the point of a good comedy FanFic is to put the main characters in an unusual situation that they themselves would never normally do. Yet to still have them in character, in their new surroundings, that way you get to see you favorite characters doing something new and humorous. I think I've done an ok job of capturing that, Ryo and Dee are pretty well in character. Yet, the whole basis of the story is a huge drug innuendo, which they would never really do. But I like to think that if Ryo and Dee where to get high, this would be about how it would happen.
Oh! And that was my fist fanfic!!