SMILE

Disclaimer: I don't own nothin'. (Sob/: ) This just reminds me every day. Let me tell you, it kinda sucks because I haven't taken a look at it for a LONG time. Forgive me.

Mutsumi's POV

I guess I've been lying about my feelings for all this time. Na-san knows, though. She's always known, just as I have for her. We both fell in love with poor little Kei-kun, always so full of bad luck.

I remember when we meet so long ago, beneath the cherry blossoms of the Hinata House's trees. Ara ara. I seems just like yesterday.

I still remember the night we met

You said you loved my smile

FLASHBACK

She had been sitting underneath the sakura tree, watching the petals fall to the floor. Mama had said that other little kids were there, and that she could play whatever she wanted with them. To her sorrow, she found that mama had lied- there hadn't been anyone to play with ever since they had gotten there.

A little boy walks up to her crouched figure, clutching the Liddo-kun doll as if it were dear life. "Hey! Are you Mutsumi?" he asks her with a small voice, itching the cheek with a bandaid upon it. She nodded, unsure what to say.

Mama didn't lie! There was someone there to play with. The little girl smiled as she stood up from her spot, watching as he stood a bit away from her with a kind grin.

"You have a cute smile," he told her, walking toward the girl with a hand out for her to take. "You wanna play with me?"

She quickly nodded, taking his hand.

END FLASHBACK

Kei-kun and I became quick friends. We played together every day after we had met, and had fun building sand-castles in the sandbox at the park. We were inseparatable...

...but then Na-chan showed up.

She was littler than us but Kei-kun had taken an instant liking to her, even if she was about two years-old. When she was sick, he'd stop playing with me and come see her, care for her the best he could by bringing things for the adults who attended her. He'd always make up excuses to come and see her in the middle of the night, if only to wish her goodnight or to watch over her during her bad days. Kei-kun would stay there the whole night and risk his own health for her.

I knew then that he had fallen in love with her, no matter if I seemed to like it or not. I'd come with him all the time, only because she was my best friend- and I had fallen in love with him too.

But your love was like a summer breeze

Oh, it lasted for a while

I guess when I felt that I wouldn't be seeing them again for a long time, I made them both promise to go to Tokyo U. I convinced Kei-kun to make Na-chan promise to go to Todai with him. She agreed. Later that day, I asked the smaller child if she liked Kei-kun too. After playing jakken with her in the past, I challenged her to a duel. Winner becomes his wife. Ara ara.

I loved them both so much that I couldn't chose between them- take Kei-kun for myself and leave sick Na-chan in the dust or let them become lovers and we all stay best friends for eternity and even after. ...So, I lost on purpose.

Those two were meant for each other. I knew it. My heart knew it. I couldn't get in the way of that.

I could hold on

A little tighter I know

But if you love someone

You gotta let them go

I smiled when I met up with them again. I didn't recognize them immediately. Fifteen or sixteen years had past. They were different than the last time I had seen them. Who would remember anything.

When I had remembered everything, I just kept smiling because I wanted Kei-kun to choose on his own. Ara ara. I would laugh when I saw them in strange appearances that could have fooled anyone into thinking rash things, only to cry once I was alone.

No matter what, I had promised to stay out of their relationship. So, no matter what, I'm going to smile for the two of them.

So I'm gonna smile

Cause I wanna make you happy

Laugh

So you can't see me cry

I'm gonna let you go in style

And even if kills me

I'm gonna smile

He had kissed me once, when I thought that I was five years old again. It was a strange experience, but it was fun to think that Kei-kun was mine again. How I wish to kiss him again, this time so I know that he isn't anymore. Even though I always ended up kissing him, I just want him to kiss me again.

I understand that he doesn't like me that way, that he choose Na-chan instead of me. It doesn't matter why, I'm just happy that he chose, thats all.

Kiss me once for the good times, baby

Kiss me twice for good-bye

You can't help how you don't feel

And it doesn't matter why

I'm going to let them alone once and for all, although I'm not sure if the other girls will. I'm bowing out of the race, ara ara, and I want it to be that way. I want him to remember me as a good friend other than some girl that tried to steal him away from his dream girl.

Give me a chance

To bow down gracefully

Cause that's how I want you

To remember me

So I'm gonna smile

Cause I wanna make you happy

Laugh

So you can't see me cry

I'm gonna let you go in style

And even if kills me

I'm gonna smile

I know that he hasn't really noticed how much I grin at the two of them, about how much time I ask Haruka for hours so I won't bump into them that much outside of work. He needed to have to courage to go through this relationship with Na-chan, even more courage for their next step.

I laugh as I always do about the stupid things I do, ara ara, and no one's ever seen the truth that I'm a lot more ditzier when I'm around those two. That way, the only hurting they see is my outward pain. Nobody can really know how much I feel for Kei-kun.

I'm letting him go. I tell myself that all the time, although I'm not that able to accept it all the time. I've vowed to Na-chan that, even if it kills me, that I'm gonna cheer the two of them on.

I'm gonna smile

So you can find the courage

Laugh

So you won't see me hurting'

I'm gonna let you go in style

And even if kills me

I'm gonna smile

I smiled on their wedding day. No matter my past feelings for him, I was happy for the two of them. This was my good-bye. I would always be seen as a friend, and vice-versa, ara ara, and that suited me fine now. I would always, always love Kei-kun, but I will always cheer them on and help them out no matter what.

That is my permanate decision.

THE END

orokid: I just thought that a look into Mutsumi's feelings would put perseptive into the books and Anime. She had givevn up, but he was always on her mind.