Title : Between the Lines
Pairing: Seth/Ryan
Rating : PG
Summary: Seth and Ryan examine their feelings after running into one another after some time apart.
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"What have I missed?" he asked the tall, dark-skinned girl in glasses. She responded by putting her forefinger to her lips to tell him to shut up.
Seth rolled his eyes. If UCLA was planning on admitting students like her, he might have to look elsewhere. They were taking a freaking campus tour for chrissakes, so why was she behaving like they were at a Dr. Phil convention?
"This is the student union," the tour guide said, pointing to a tall building. "Students usually hang out here in between classes and a lot of clubs meet here during the weekend." The stylish brunette looked at her watch. "Let's break for lunch. I'll meet you here in about an hour. Is 1:30 good for everyone?"
Seth took the resulting sounds of groans and cheers as agreement and as the group dispersed, his eyes fell on an unmistakable, lone sandy-haired figure.
It had been almost a year since he'd seen that body. At first, he hadn't understood why Ryan had left, but the more he thought about it, he realized that he couldn't not leave. It wouldn't have been true to his character... he wouldn't have been the boy he'd fallen in love with.
How odd was it that he'd finally been able to acknowledge that? He wondered if he'd ever be able to share that with anyone, but it had come to feel very natural to him. He still dated Summer and enjoyed kissing her when they weren't fighting, but he couldn't deny that she couldn't fill that void – the one that had been unoccupied since he'd left.
He still couldn't understand how it all happened to him. His life had always been about passion – about falling head over heels in love and chasing the object of that love. He'd always been colorful in his language and approach, enjoying the challenge, being the center of attention, reveled in his difference and uniqueness, but somehow, that quiet brooding boy had cut straight into his heart.
He couldn't even pinpoint what he loved about him, was it his aloofness, his sincerity, the way his eyes danced when he was unsure? Was it even physical? He did have that indescribable, somewhat peppery scent that came with his perfectly toned body but Seth felt it transcended the physical. It had to, because, he'd never thought of himself as one attracted to the male physique, but the truth was he couldn't deny that he was also attracted to that side of him. He certainly knew it wasn't his obsession with saving the very whiny Marissa, but he couldn't really hate that about him because that was embedded in his DNA and without that, he'd have been a very different person; a far less desirable Ryan.
Seth followed the drooping figure into the building. Except it wasn't quite bent. It seemed that in the past year, Ryan had developed a borderline strut. The building was packed with students and it wasn't long before he lost him in the crowd. He searched for him for a few minutes, not knowing what he'd say to him, only hoping to catch a glimpse of him, but when it looked fruitless, he gave it up and decided to get himself some lunch.
Ryan watched him walk into the cafeteria and pick up a tray. He'd noticed him join the group in his usual rambunctious way. He smiled – there was no changing that boy. He wasn't surprised that he hadn't mentioned that'd he'd be taking the UCLA tour, after all, he hadn't mentioned it either. Their occasional phone conversations were restricted to talking about the mundane and things that didn't even matter at all, so, talking about college wasn't on the list.
He hadn't realized that he'd miss him so much. Strike that, that was a lie. He'd known it the minute he met him as he'd never been so intrigued by someone.
They'd begged him to return to Newport when Theresa lost the baby. But how could he? How could he leave Theresa with the guy who'd beaten her baby out of her? He had to stay with her till he was sure that Eddie couldn't hurt her anymore. When he was safely behind bars, he stayed with her till she got her strength back and after that, he couldn't see the point in moving. He didn't miss any appointments with his probation officer, he kept in touch with Sandy and soon after, everyone just left him alone. Just like he wanted.
For a good while, he deceived himself that there was no other reason he didn't want to get back to Newport. But the more he missed the talkative boy with a penchant for putting his foot in his mouth, the more he acknowledged the truth. They were so different, yet complemented one another in ways he and Marissa could never have and he often wondered why he ever wasted his time with her in the first place. On reflection, he didn't really think she was that cute and as for her personality, what was he thinking?
He concluded that choosing her was so easy after all, she was the girl next door. If only he'd known that the person he needed was even closer. But then there were all those issues with wanting Seth. How would his parents handle it? They invited him into their home and in turn, he'd fallen in love with their son. He was sure Seth didn't feel the same way and even though he wasn't one to dwell on unrequited love, he wasn't sure he could handle seeing him everyday and pretending to feel otherwise.
His heart beat furiously – Seth had caught his eye when he turned around to search for a table. Ryan waved him over and waited. The closer he got, the more attractive he seemed to get. The past year had really been good to him -he'd cut his hair a lot shorter and his shoulders looked a tad broader.
He should have hugged him but it would have been hard being so close to him. He still hadn't gotten over how his body seemed to fit his perfectly and since he didn't need any more things to fixate about at night, he stuck out his hand instead.
"You should have told me you were coming here," Seth said shortly after he sat across from him.
Ryan shrugged. "I didn't decide till two days ago. What do you think of it so far?"
Seth looked around the cafeteria. "It looks okay but I must admit that I haven't seen much of it."
As they ate, as usual, they spoke about the mundane and things that didn't matter and when they both stood up to return their trays, Seth asked hopefully, "Want to hang out with me for the rest of the tour?"
"Sure," Ryan replied, nodding. Would they keep talking late into the evening or would he wave him off as he climbed into Kirsten's car? Ryan looked into his smiling face. It doesn't matter really, he thought. It was just so good to see him.