Duck Abuse!
One-shot comedy. Enjoy!
Disclaimer: I do not own Harvest Moon or any of its characters.
Warning: Do not read if you love ducks.
"Where are the froggies? It's raining, they should be here!" The little girl whined.
"They're not coming, Witchkin," her aunt responded. "They were annoying me and when you let them in, they tracked mud all over the house."
"So?"
"So, I put a spell on the island that prevented them from coming."
"WHAT? How could you, you old hag? I'M GONNA MAKE YOU HURT FOR THIS!"
"Shut up, you brat! Why don't you just go look for those dumb frogs somewhere else? Or better yet, GET OVER YOUR STUPID OBSESSION!"
"No, I must plot my REVENGE!" With that, Witchkin stomped out of the bright pink house, holding her little stuffed frog in a death-grip.
"We'll teach that meanie a lesson, won't we, Froggie?" Witchkin spoke softly to her toy after taking a deep breath. "But first we are gonna need some allies. Hm…" The young girl scanned the area, looking for any form of life.
She gasped. "That'll do just fine!" Suddenly, the toddler pounced on a duck innocently walking by. The fluffy creature quacked out in pain and horror. "Wow, I'll bet you can't wait to help me teach that old witch a lesson, huh? Come on, let's go!" The little girl then ran back inside, still clutching the white duck.
"HEY! OLD HAG! WHERE ARE YOU? WE'RE READY TO TAKE YOU OUT!"
Witch Princess then emerged from behind the corner. "Take me out? Not a chance kid, I've been using magic since…" She paused as she looked at what Witchkin held in her arms. "What's with the duck?"
"He's here to help me and Froggie KICK YOUR UGLY BUTT! Attack, Mr. Ducky!" Witchkin then threw the horrified animal at her aunt. Sadly, she never had a very good arm, and the duck was thrown two feet before getting its beak smashed into the floor. The duck writhed around in pain, wishing it had hands to clutch its broken beak with.
"Witchkin, if you keep that up, you're gonna kill it."
"What? Oh, so you mean when an animal moves around and makes sound, it's dying? Oh no, I'll save you, Mr. Ducky!" Witchkin then ran up to the pained bird and proceeded in whacking it repeatedly with her stuffed frog, shouting, "Live Mr. Ducky! LIVE!"
Mr. Ducky, on the other hand, found it harder to 'live' while he was being beaten with a toy, so he curled up in a ball, hoping she would stop.
"…Witchkin, that's not what I meant." But Witchkin didn't hear her.
"Oh good! Mr. Ducky is quiet and motionless, that means he's alive!"
"No, it doesn't. If anything, it means you killed him."
"Nu-uh! He is silent and still just like my froggies; so that means he's alive!"
"Witchkin, your frogs aren't alive. They're just toys."
"Then I guess your bears are just toys too!"
"DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY BEARS! I've had enough of this, you brat!" And with that, Witch Princess cast a spell on her niece, causing her to immediately collapse on the floor, unconscious. She then glanced down at the little duck still playing dead at her feet.
"Oh, that poor thing. I can't just toss it's carcass out in the rain… Oh, I know!" She then began the delicate process of tearing the bird's guts out, and stuffing it. Of course, the bird was still alive until Witch Princess cut a long slit on its stomach, when it died instantaneously. Once she'd finished the bloody procedure, Witch Princess sowed him back up and placed him beside the still-sleeping Witchkin.
"Hmph, the brat better appreciate this. I won't be this nice to her again for another millennium or so." And with that, Witch Princess left to go and groom her numerous teddy bears.