"If I had known the end was so near I would have done much, much more with my life.
If I had known I would die so soon, I would have not have allowed myself to be taken over by my emotions.
I would have smelled more flowers. I would have allowed myself shed my tears, and release my hurt, for once.
I would have forgiven all of those who have hurt me…and I would cry for those I have hurt.
I would have tried harder…to love without the hate, to feel the pleasure of love, not only the sadness. I would have let myself be loved.
If I had known my life would be so short, I would have tried to enjoy life more.
Because no one has suffered more then I have."
Bittersweetthe life of Jakotsu
Jakotsu faintly remembered…the ground had been cold only moments earlier…and the air had been cold too. He remembered how he had shivered in the cool air of the cave, only to be warmed by the thought of seeing Inuyasha. Funny…now as Jakotsu lay dieing on the hard ground, he felt no cold…only a numb sort of warmth that spread through his entire body…he felt…nice. Death wasn't so bad after all. Jakotsu drew in a deep breath. Everything was growing faint…he gently closed his eyes…and allowed the images of his life to flash before him.
70 years ago…
"Jakotsu, isn't she cute? I'm sure she'll make the perfect bride!"
Jakotsu looked up at his mother…she looked so cheerful…so happy that he was going to be married to the girl across from him. The girl looked cute enough. She was wearing a yellow Kimono and her hair was tied up in a ribbon. Jakotsu studied her. She looked approximately seven years old, which was three years younger then he was.
"So, Takenaga-San, me son be marrying your lovely daughter, Sayo?" Jakotsu asked the girls father.
"I think Sayo will be ready when she is 14"
"And she is healthy?"
"Of course."
Jakotsu tuned out of their conversation, and looked at Sayo again. Another boy his age wouldn't have minded the arranged marriage…but somehow…it felt wrong to Jakotsu. He wondered briefly to himself if he could really spend his whole life with this girl. Would she be the one to bear his children? He couldn't imagine it.
Jakotsu suddenly realized he was staring at Sayo, who was smiling brightly at him. He tried to make himself smile, but it felt so fake, so wrong, as if he was lying.
"Its settled then." His father's voice interrupted Jakotsu's thoughts. He looked up to see his father, and AyameTakenaga shaking hands. The date had been decided, the amount of money agreed upon, and the pleasantries exchanged. The business was finished.
"Come on Sayo, let's go." Takenaga said. Sayo rose to her feet and her family left, before exchanging brief goodbyes. As Sayo left, Jakotsu felt a small weight lifted from him, one that he didn't even know he had. He sighed softly to himself, in relief.
"Aren't you happy Jakotsu? You just met the girl you're going to marry one day." Jakotsu's father asked. Jakotsu studied the ground.
"I don't know…it feels strange. I'm not sure if I'll be able to love her." Jakotsu replied uncertainly.
"You're still young." His mother chirped. "Its normal for a young boy not to feel attracted to girls yet. I'm sure you'll adore her when you're older." She paused. "Besides…it doesn't really matter all that much If you love her. As long as she can look after the house for you, cook, and have your children. Its important to be able to have a child to help you out."
Jakotsu's mother, Kiko, looked genuinely happy. In fact she looked happier then Jakotsu had seen in a long time. He doubted she was happy because for him, rather she was happy that in 9 years, Jakotsu would move out of the house, and she would be finally rid of him. She's so selfish. Jakotsu thought. It was hard to understand why a man like Jakotsu's father, Reisuki, would marry a woman like Kiko. Jakotsu loved his mother very much, but often he would get the impression that she didn't care for him at all. Sometimes she would look at him with fear in her eyes, as if she was troubled that something might be wrong with him. Maybe there is. Jakotsu wondered if that was true. It often seemed, even to him that there was something slightly different about him then all his friends. While his friends all chased and teased girls, Jakotsu felt no interest for it. He didn't understand why they felt they had to tease girls they liked. It was…immature. What was so interesting about girls anyways? Jakotsu preferred to be with his friends or his father. He admired his father, Reisuki very much. Many people did, for Reisuki was a very brave man, who was quite well trained in sword fighting. Whenever a demon was attacking the village, the village people would call on Reisuki for help. I want to be like my father when I grow up. Jakotsu thought. Someone who is strong, brave and good hearted. I want to be just as humble and generous as he is.
"Sayo will love you very much, Jakotsu." You're such a kind hearted young boy. I imagine you'll be a fine man." Reisuki said. He patted Jakotsu's head affectionately, and Jakotsu smiled, a smile only someone who was genuinely happy could make.
Hey…I hope I doesn't seem like this is the end of my story. I sort of wish it was, but there's sad events in Jakotsu's life, that I will write. I hope I do a good job, on this. Jakotsu deserves it.