I stand with the knife to cut across my palm with it as I watch my blood boil onto the coals. My name is Beatrice Grace Prior and I have just become Dauntless. I'm sad to leave my parents as they are basically my best friends but I want this. I want adventure. I want to be brave and learn how to live without fear for however much time I have to live.
That's the thing about time. I've borrowed it. You see, three years ago, when I was thirteen, I was diagnosed in Erudite with thyroid cancer that has now spread to my lungs. Things were shaky for a while but then I started taking the magical pill of Phalanxifor. The doctors determined that while it's not a cure, which has never been a part of my treatment goal, the drug could stop the growth and add time to my life.
This isn't a cancer story though because those are boring and depressing. Instead, this is a love story and the story of how I decided to live the rest of my life.
After the choosing ceremony ends, I follow the crowd up the stairs and run alongside them. They blend together to form what looks like a black cloud. I make it up the stairs before I have to adjust the prongs in my nose and catch my breath as the other jump on.
I place my oxygen tank which I call Philip, onto the train first as best I can before I jump and land on my face. A girl dressed in Candor clothing greets me as we introduce ourselves to each other. We both afraid to jump as we reach Dauntless headquarters so I hold one of her hands and jump, landing relatively unscathed.
A Dauntless leader who introduces himself as Max invites us to jump. I climb to the edge of the room, hands wrapped around Philip, as I close my eyes and jump. I feel my body floating through the air and land onto a net that cradles my body.
I laugh hysterically as I catch my breath for a moment when a hand reaches out to me. I grab it and pull myself off the net. I peer into the most gorgeous blue eyes I have ever seen as he asks "What's your name?"
I hesitate for a moment as he adds "Choose carefully, you don't get to pick again." I decide on Tris as he leads me inside and welcomes me to Dauntless. I change into black clothing like everyone else does and switch to a tank that fits onto my back as we head to dinner.
I notice that everyone seems to be eating circular pieces of meat they call a hamburger but I don't eat meat so I eat some potatoes cut into rectangular pieces they call fries into some red, tomato sauce they call ketchup.
I'm seated directly from our instructor who calls himself Four. He looks at me with an eyebrow raised. "No meat?" he asks me curiously and I shake my head no. "I don't eat meat, I don't want to be responsible for killing or anything dying because of me." I answer with a smirk that I think he chuckles slightly at.
We're expected to be in the training room tomorrow morning at 8 AM and I am tired so I decide to unhook myself from Philip to the BiPap machine and oxygen concentrator that my parents arranged to be here a couple days ago.
Trying to sleep in a room full of people proves difficult especially as Al, one of the other initiates here, sobs loudly throughout the night. After a quick breakfast, I make sure to strap a smaller version of Philip to my back as Four demonstrates how to shoot a gun.
The weight of the gun feels strange and heavy in my hand. I hold it awkwardly at first but adjust quickly and manage to hit the target before lunch. We go through a line to choose what we want during lunch so I pick noodles in a cheese sauce called macaroni and cheese, a small salad and a piece of cake.
The food here is delicious and definitely different from what we eat at home in Abnegation. The cake is my favorite part though and I find myself guarding it against another initiate with dark skin and a handsome face known as Uriah.
After lunch, we watch Four as he demonstrates some of the fighting techniques we may need to use tomorrow for our first round of fights. I notice during one of the kicks he demonstrates that his pant moves up to reveal metal instead of skin. How did I not notice it before?
Soon after he finishes, a blonde man with a pierced eyebrow and lip enters the room. His name is Eric and I remember meeting him briefly at dinner last night. I move to one of the punching bags around the room and punch until my knuckles are split.
I feel Four's eyes on me as well as Eric's. He surprises me by putting an arm around my stomach as he says in a low, deep voice "You don't have much muscle so you're better off using your knees and elbows to attack and put more power behind them. Always keep tension here." he finishes, releasing my stomach.
Christina drags me into the Pit later that night as we are joined by Al and Will to get tattoos. I decide to get three stars falling away from my heart tattooed near my collarbone. It stings but it's nothing compared to the other pains I've been through.
Christina has me try a short cut black dress that shows off my stars and dawns my face with black eyeliner that makes my eyes pop. "Why did you get stars?" she asks. "Stars are infinite and forever, I wanted my family and my life to be like that." I answer.
"Well, aren't you the little philosopher?" she teases before dragging me to buy the dress and eyeliner before we head back to the dorms for the night.