"All right, people," his tentacles waved. "Let's get started, shall we? Class monitor, if you would do the honours."
"Right!" Shiota said, and stood up, making the rest of the class stand up too, holding their guns. "Ready? Aim…fire!" They started shooting, Octopus-sensei dodging every single one of them.
"Oh! Oh, my…" Octopus-sensei gasped. "Well…why don't I just call roll while you children just wear yourselves out?" It paused, before speaking again, "Isogai?"
"Here!" Isogai yelled.
"What's that? I'm afraid I can't make it out over all the commotion!"
"Here!" Isogai yelled again, this time louder.
"Okajima?"
"Here!" Okajima replied.
"Okuda?"
"Here!" Okuda squeaked.
"Kataoka?"
"Here!" Kataoka answered.
"Kayano?"
"Here!" Kayano shrieked.
After he finished taking attendance, the class' bullets were also over and everyone was panting in exhaustion.
All, but me. You see…I am rather smart. I know that we cannot kill him at this level, and I do not try to kill him, unlike those foolish little classmates of mine. I am waiting for more weaknesses.
"He's fast," Nakamura sighed.
"The whole class fired, and he doesn't even have a scratch," Isogai stated, eyebrows furrowed.
"No luck today either, eh? That's really too bad," Octopus-sensei said. "What's the lesson here? Numbers are no substitute for inventiveness, perhaps? That any hack can point a gun or pull a trigger? Some of Column A? Some of Column B? I get that you're trying to cast the net as widely as possible so to speak, but the approach lacked originality. When the target goes at Mach 20, an assassin has to think outside the box!"
"Ha, right, Mach 20," Maehara scoffed. "No freaking way did you dodge all those bullets."
"He's got a point," Sugino remarked. "I mean, these are only BBs, right? For all we know, you just stood there and took them like a champ."
Octopus-sensei sighed, "Collect the ammunition and bring it here." It took a gun from a student, and spoke again, "As explained, these are anti-me BBs. Harmless to you, but…" It then proceeded to shoot one of its tentacles. It came right off. People gasped, amazed. "Able to split myself like a knife through warm tofu. Developed by the government for that purpose. Of course, after a few seconds, I can regenerate as good as new!" Its cut-off tentacle grew back up. "A luxury you won't have, if you accidentally shoot your eye out. From now on, no discharging guns in the classroom. Safety first…" It paused, and then green stripes appeared on its face. "…and good luck killing me before graduation."
"O-kay! Here's puzzler for you…" Octopus-sensei told us. "Isogai!"
"Uh…sir?" Isogai stood up.
Four of its tentacles turned blue, white, pink and green. "Which of these four tentacles is the odd man out?"
"Um…the blue one?" his answer was more of question than an answer.
"Correct! 'The boy who is standing', implies 'who', as a relative pronoun!"
However evil and weird Octopus-sensei is, there's no denying he's a good teacher. Seriously. I mean, he makes me understand Math so easily now! I used to fail at it, but now, I'm passing.
"One! Two! Three! Four! Five! Six! Seven! Eight!" we yelled as we swung the anti-octopus knives around. Koro-sensei was busy playing in the sandbox, mourning about how Karasuma-sensei was being mean and how we liked it when he was their PE teacher.
I rolled my eyes, "Karasuma-sensei is a much better teacher than you. The exercises you taught us were impossible for any normal human being."
"Mean!"
"I'm simply stating facts there," I shot a sharp glare at him.
"Isogai, Maehara, step up," Karasuma-sensei ordered.
They did as told.
"I want you to try to attack me with those knives."
They blinked. "Wait…like, as a team?" Isogai questioned nervously.
"Do you think that's a good idea?" Maehara murmured, unsure.
"These knives weren't designed to harm human beings," Karasuma-sensei said. "Tell you what – manage to land a hit on me and you can go home for the day."
"Okay…" Isogai murmured. They readied themselves, and Isogai swung a knife at him, Karasuma-sensei dodging. Maehara attacked, but Karasuma-sensei just fended him off with a light push on his wrist. Isogai attacked again, and Karasuma-sensei blocked.
"See that, kids?" Karasuma-sensei turned to us. "I can practically dodge them in my sleep. They've got no technique. If you can't land a hit on a guy like me, you've got no chance landing a hit on a target whose top speed is Mach 20." He looked at Koro-sensei. "We've been sparring for half a minute and look…he's even changed clothes, made tea, and built a model of a castle."
"That is so irritating," Maehara muttered, pissed.
I told them. I told them that they wouldn't be able to kill Koro-sensei, not even in a million years…but they haven't listened. They brushed me off, calling me stuck-up. Karasuma-sensei thinks we can do it, though. I don't. It's unrealistic. I mean, Koro-sensei has a speed of Mach 20, how are we supposed to land a hit on him if he's so fast?
I sighed, and looked at my watch. Oh, this period's almost done! I grinned, and right after that, he dismissed us. I bowed with the class, and then I turned back to go back to class, when I spotted him – Karma Akabane.
Oh, yeah, I heard he was gonna be transferring here…now, to ogle at him as discreetly as possible while I walk and get to class so I can finish studying for the next period's quiz in peace…
I climbed up the steps while glancing at him, and he took no notice of me as usual. He never did.
I finished up with my quiz, and glanced at Koro-sensei, who was 'punching' the wall. I sweat dropped.
"Um…what is he doing?" Mimura asked.
"I dunno…I think he's punching the wall," Yada replied.
"No, you're right," Isogai spoke. "Karma's smack-talk seems to have really touched a nerve."
"But what's the point of punching a wall when his tentacles are too soft to do any damage?" Maehara questioned. Koro-sensei slumped.
I snorted, "He should break something instead."
"Okay, that's enough!" Okano shrieked. "Could you maybe stop that?! We're trying to take a quiz here!"
"S-S-Sorry!" Koro-sensei stammered, nervous. "Y-Yes, absolutely!"
"You sure you know what you're getting yourself into, Karma? The jellyfish is sincerely pissed off at you," Terasaka said, smirking.
"You can't pay me enough to be in your shoes," Yoshida stated.
"If I was you I'd stay at home with my head under the pillow," Muramatsu informed.
"Course he's pissed, who wouldn't be if someone made an attempt on their life?" Karma turned to them. "Lest the would-be assassins who would've pissed themselves in the process."
Terasaka glared at him, "I didn't piss myself! That attitude's gonna get your ass killed!" Ah, Karma is so cool, riling people up like that. If only I could do that, if only I could be as confident as him.
"Quiet, please! No noise during a quiz!" Koro-sensei shouted angrily.
"Sorry, Koro-sensei, my bad," Karma spoke. "No worries, though, I've already finished. I'll just eat this gelato, if that's okay." He took out a strawberry flavoured gelato and waved it about. He is so cool!
"Not so fast, no eating in class!" Koro-sensei hissed. It paused, and then shouted, "Hey! That's the gelato I brought back from Italy yesterday!"
Karma licked a bit, and looked at him, "Huh? Sorry, my bad, I just saw it chilling in faculty lounge." Cooler! He really knows how to rile people up!
"This won't do young man! I flew through the coldest layer of the stratosphere to keep that delicious treat from melting!"
Karma just looked at him, "Yeah? So, what'd you gonna do?" He took a long lick of it. "Hit me?" Whoa. He's good.
"Of course not!" Its face turned red. "Now, have it back and have simply what's left, thank you very much!" It walked towards Karma, when suddenly, there was a pop and it looked down. "Anti-me BBs?!" Ingenious!
Karma pointed a gun at him, and shot twice, both the times Koro-sensei dodging. "Wow, that's twice in one day, teach." Karma stood up, still pointing the gun. He walked towards Koro-sensei, "I'm gonna keep pulling the same tricks. Class will get interrupted, our grades will slip. Let's be straight up, though. If you want this to stop, you can just kill me. You just have to let go of wanting us to see you as our teacher. Give us a taste of your ugly side." His tone turned malicious. "Or, you can just make peace with all this, and accept that I'll be the one to kill you." He spilt the gelato on Koro-sensei, and left out the door.
The whole class was silent. Even me. Though I was gushing and buzzing with questions on the inside. Everything he had just said…it seemed like Karma hated teachers. It must be because of past experiences. Hm…let me ask Arashi for some information on him.
"Arashi, I need information," I sighed.
"On who?"
"Karma Akabane."
"Life incidents or personal info?"
"Life incidents."
"On it. Any particular topic?"
"Teachers."
He smirked, "Ah. Now, get out and get chocolate milk and chocolate cake for me. By that time, it'll be sent to your laptop."
I nodded, "Okay. Thanks."
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