もうー度あなたを抱き締めたい できるだけそっと
I want to hug you once more, as soft as I can
She had often wondered about the intricacies of death.
Was there light at the end of the tunnel?
Was there really a heaven?
Or a hell?
At least she'd been able to tell him she loved him before she let go.
Her eyes flicker open, and she is faced with the brilliant blue of the midday sky. The sun is directly above her, and she cringes away from the scorching white light. It seems too bright to be real, too picture-book. There are trees that frame the sky, and they dance and whisper to each other in the barely-there breeze. The breeze is warm. Welcoming.
She sits up, raises a hand to her forehead, wipes away the perspiration. She lets herself look around for a moment, even though she knows exactly where she is. Takes in the tree-line; how close it is, how suffocating. Seems like it's getting closer, trapping her. Sighs. Lets go of the tension building up in her shoulders. The trees are not getting closer. Breathe.
Everything is so bright. Something is wrong – she just can't place her finger on it. Something about the trees is not right, a little off. Like looking at a photo – everything is clear, there's just no…
There's just no life.
Frowns. Suddenly understands. An overwhelming impulse to run sweeps under her feet, knocking her sideways. She runs, hurtles into the trees. Doesn't care about the sticks that whip her face, her arms, her body. Doesn't care about the roots that trip her up. She gets up again, every time. She can't be alone. She has to find somebody. She needs to find somebody. She needs some sort of clarification. She can't just be dead!
Dead. The word…it seems so final. Dead. That's it. The end of a sentence.
She stops. What's the point? If she's dead, truly dead, then what is she running to? What is the point?
What's the point? She screams to nobody, throws her arms out. Looks desperately through the trees. Wishes that somebody, anybody, would call back. Give her an answer. Just let her know that this wasn't going to be everything.
No, she couldn't let it be everything. She would make it something.
So she kept running. Forward, forward, forward. Don't stop. Don't ever stop.
She explodes onto the beach, falling forward onto the warm sand, sobbing to herself. Great, heaving sobs. There's no wind from the ocean. The water is still. No waves, no thing to soothe her aching heart. Nothing to quell the emotion that rages in her stomach. The sun burns, relentless and unforgiving. She wraps her arms across her chest, clings to herself. Lets the emotion pour out of her until there's nothing left to give.
What she wouldn't give to be back in his arms, comfortably playing House. They were playing House, but who cared? It felt real. It was real. They had a life there. They were happy.
She opens her eyes. She's still lying on the sand, still faced with a silent ocean.
Oh god. Maybe this really is it.
Is that Juliet?
The sun disappears, and she sighs in relief as the shadow falls over her.
Is she okay?
She looks up.
Juliet, can you hear me?
Oh no. No, no, no.
Juliet, you're safe now. Don't worry.
I don't want to be dead.