First Time

On their way from Coruscant, Padmé took a chance to have a good and relatively undisturbed rest in her cabin onboard her Nubian. The recent events took their toll on her physical as well as mental health – today, she just let her tired and bruised body fall into the welcoming embrace of the soft pillows of her small but comfortable bed. The nasty slashes from Nexu – her badges of honor, the proof that the last few days were very much real – ached viciously, mostly because of the infection that sept in and easily got into the open flesh wounds.

With her head full of troubles, she just wished to relax and forget just about everything gnawing at her conscience, but her current state of mind and his presence was making it impossible.

Having him so close – just in the other room, she could almost see him sitting in the pilot chair, shoulders little slumped and his expression one of unrest – he´s been through so much in such a short time. She could see his eyes, focused on the controls in front of him, his hands, large and strong, even the one made of metal, steady on the ship´s controls, guiding them to Naboo where he was bound to leave her…

No, she didn't want to think about it now but deep in her brain she knew that they will have to sort things out very soon, they couldn't ignore their feelings anymore.

For a little while she was wishing to be more selfish and careless, so she could just forget the fact they couldn't be together. She wished he would leave the Jedi and his duties behind and she yearned for his presence, for as he once said – his presence soothes her, makes her feel safe, loved.

As if sensing her longing, the next time she opened her heavy eyes, she almost jumped when she saw him leaning against the doorway of her suite, his eyes intent on her, scanning her, almost burning in their intensity.

"Anakin, what are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be piloting the ship?" She drew herself to a sitting position.

"I set the ship on autopilot. Don´t worry, 3PO is watching it anyway." His tone was low and soothing, making her want him to come to her, hold her, kiss away her cares.

"Since when can 3PO pilot a ship?" Her light-hearted reply loosened the tension a bit. She managed to prop herself on an elbow playfully.

"He´s already gone through my thorough instruction, he´s a quick learner." He replied with his trademark grin.

The easiness of the atmosphere evaporated and Anakin's face turned serious again. With some reverence, he moved to sit on the edge of her bed and hesitantly, his left hand came to gently play with a loose strand of her hair, feeling its smooth texture and silkiness. His eyes then fixed on hers. They were almost frightening in their intensity.

"What's really bothering you, Padmé?" His voice rumbled her name in such a special way, making it sound like a name of some saint. She almost wished that no one else would ever say her name again, only him.

Meanwhile, he shifted closer as if sensing her resignation and need to shut down, she let her head fall on his warm and wide chest with a deep sigh. His hands immediately went around her, encompassing her in his comfortable embrace, warming her, making everything all right, nudging her further into his arms so she curled in his lap.

He slowly started rubbing his cheek against the crown of her head, occasionally reaching down and tentatively kissing her hair.

Not saying a word, he waited patiently for her to open up.

"For the first time in my life, I don´t know what to do. I´ve always been sure of the rightness of my decisions, always had everything planned out and was… so bound by traditions and obligation. Whether it was to my family, to my planet, or to the system and now it´s all mixed up, I don´t know what to do, I'm no longer so self-assured, I feel like falling in the dark and I can see only you being able to reach out and help me…" After that she raised her head to look at him desperately. "Everything changed when you´ve walked into my life again – I can´t do this on my own anymore. I need you, Anakin."

For the whole time, he daren't utter a single syllable, just kept his eyes wide and full of wonder.

"I…I don´t know what to say, Padmé. I've always thought that you didn't need anyone to tell you how to live or what to do, you've been always so sure of yourself and what you do. And you did it so well, even if it meant we couldn't be together it made me proud of you but, now I really don´t know what to say, I –"

"Then don´t say anything…" And with that she cupped his face and kissed him deeply. Anakin slowly gave himself into the kiss, the flutter that was always there when his lips made contact with hers was alive and present. As the kiss got more intense, Padmé´s hands moved to his hair to play with the strands lovingly while the fingers of Anakin´s left hand gently brushed against the sensitive skin of Padmé´s neck. The first contact of their hands while kissing set them off. Their only kisses consisted of nothing but their lips touching but now and now they were experiencing a whole new measure of feelings.

Padmé involuntarily let out a light moan and slowly ended the kiss, enjoying the delightful pop echoing around the cabin as their lips slowly disengaged, reveling in the after-effects of their union.

"I want you in my life, now or never."

"But the things you've said before – that we couldn´t possibly…"

"I don´t really care about that now."

A huge smile slowly formed on his face and then he was laughing, gripping her small form tightly.

"So, does it really mean you want me to be with you, despite the hiding and secrecy? Because if you say yes, then you´re stuck with me for life, you won´t get rid of me that easily…" A charming grin formed on his face when the last word left his lips.

"Yes, Anakin Skywalker – I want to be with you, in good or bad times. I want you to be my friend, my soulmate, my lover…"

All he could do was to stare at her, awed by her confession and the fact that she really meant it, she really wanted him to…?

"I'm ready for it, for us to make love. I want you to be my first, Anakin. "

"You mean you´ve never?"

To confirm his assumption, she just shook her head.

"I mean I thought that you´d…I´d expect you to be – I don´t know…"

He hung his head down, trying to swallow the fact.

"Are you disappointed or…?"

„No! I´m glad because I´ve never too, you know…"

„Never?"

„No – you´re the only one I´ve ever wanted, the only one I wanted to share my body with, no one else, Padmé – only you…"

Touched by his confession, Padmé wasted no time and tugged him closer by his Padawan braid. He let himself be tumbled down to her bed and he pinned her beneath him. Now, she was looking up at him from beneath her thick lashes and murmured her soft I love you before initiating a new kiss, much slower and unhurried than before.

She reveled in the unknown feeling of having him so intimately close, his entire body pressed against her, feeling him in places she never felt anyone before, stirring alien sensations inside her, Padmé gently cupped his wide back muscles and moaned into their kiss, suddenly possessed by an unbearable urge to feel his hot, naked skin underneath her fingertips.

Anakin felt like in a dream, having his angel touching him like no one else before, he felt her lust and longing in the Force and couldn't deny his natural response to her promptings but he knew they needed to stop before things got out of hand, so when Padmé´s hands started to reach beneath his tunic and tried to unclasp his pants, Anakin broke the kiss and out of breath he stared at her.

"I…would like to wait."

Padmé only stared at him. "Wait for what, Ani? There´s no need to, we can…" And when she tried to tug him down again he rolled off of her and stared at the ceiling.

"What´s wrong? You don´t want to?" Embarrassment licked at her raw nerves, feeling she couldn't bear his rejection now, after all they've been together.

"Of course I want to, but… Can´t we wait until we´re married and you´re officially mine?"

Her eyes widened. She must have misheard him, right?

Right?

"Marry?! Ani, we c–"

"Oh yes we can, Padmé – you said you want to share your life with me, then why can´t we marry and have the permanency? I don´t want to be your lover – I…want to be your husband. I want to be completely and utterly yours when we finally…become one."

She could see his way – she always wanted a family and permanency. Lovers don´t mean that much in the course of time and if they marry secretly... But she just couldn't see the logic behind his reluctance to make love right here and now.

"Please, Padmé. Let´s wait, don´t ask me why because I can´t explain it…It just feels right."

Oh, well, maybe they could wait. After all, she should be the reasonable one, she will settle with that. But still, she wondered why he wanted to wait? Surely there was more than he let on

"Besides, we´ll reach Naboo approximately in an hour so there´s not enough time for us…"

"All right then, Ani – but I´ll be waiting."

So, he left with a promising smile, leaving her all pent up.

"Force, what have I done?"

Padmé tried, albeit unsuccessfully, reason her doing in the past 48 hours. Naturally, she failed to find any logic reason as to why she was currently standing in her wedding dress, inside the fresher of her – their bedroom.

Stang, was she ready for this? Of course she was. She was a grown, mature woman.

A grown mature woman who had been acting like a love-struck, irrational and awkward teen.

She was looking at her reflection in the mirror and pondering on the rightness of her choice. Choice that found her married to a Jedi Padawan who happened to be utterly loveable and presently waiting for her in the bedchamber, probably as nervous as she.

She was excited, but so very nervous, downright petrified of what was about to transpire, if she was honest with herself. What if she messed up? What if…Well, not that he could judge it so well when he was equally inexperienced as she. Maybe even more. That didn't change the fact she still felt so stupid now. She was supposed to be the older, more experienced one, to assume the lead and guide him.

Well, who says she still couldn't do it? At least theoretically, all the talks with her handmaidens, friends and even the education in biology lessons had her prepared enough. Certainly more than her nineteen-year-old groom who grew up sheltered in the Jedi temple. Of course, he spent the first nine years with his mother, on Tatooine and she could only imagine the things he had to witness as a child.

Back to her current situation, Padmé seemed to gain enough courage and calm herself. After all, she was used to calming her nerves before an important Senate session so something so simple shouldn't really get over her head.

Simple.

Well, it certainly was a way to put it but honestly, this was very special to her and she didn't want to experience with something so rare and fragile as this first night with the love of her life.

It was time to finally step out and face him and her fears.

One little detail hasn't been decided yet. Should she just leave her wedding dress on and leave it for him to undress her or change into her nightgown? It was laying on the vanity, a flimsy white lacy variety, with a deep cleavage that was sure to set his blood on fire. Somehow she assumed he would be completely taken by her even if she walked out dressed in a grain sack.

Having his nervous, large fingers stuck in the delicate laces probably wasn't the most strategically appropriate idea so, with a knowing pull of a few laces, her dress came apart and landed in a puddle around her feet. Running her fingers through her loose curls, she let them rest over one shoulder. Suddenly, as if overcome by a sudden excitement, she decided to divest herself even of her underwear, donning only a thin dressing gown.

Taking a deep breath, she turned to leave the small fresher. Opening the door, she nearly stumbled into the chest of her husband as he was probably about to knock on the door of the bathing room. Stopping in her tracks, she had to tilt her head back to gaze up at him, only to find him completely flustered and babbling.

"I'm sorry, Padmé…I just…wanted to…make sure you're…you're okay. I was wondering if something…" As he stuttered, his eyes were moving frantically up and down her frame, occasionally stopping to bite a lip. He was indeed blushing and Padmé, if she weren't so flustered herself, would find it adorable.

With all the courage she could muster, she gave him a reassuring smile and motioned him to step back into the room. She hoped he would say something but he continued to gaze at her, completely transfixed, his chest heaving and hands hanging uselessly by his sides. Slowly, afraid her brave Jedi protector would back away from fear, she approached him and splayed her hands on his chest, feeling it move rapidly. Reaching for his Padawan braid gently, she drew him down to her level and kissed him softly. After a while, she felt him relax, give himself completely to the touch of their lips. Her hands tunneled into his hair and tugged very lightly, raising herself to her tiptoes to reach his lips at a better angle. She felt his left hand timidly sneaking around her waist to instinctively pull her closer, but backed off immediately, when he could feel her belly pressing against his growing erection. Embarrassed, he broke the kiss and murmured a quiet sorry.

"It's okay, Ani." She smiled reassuringly.

He looked her straight in the eye and let himself be consoled, he couldn't hide the natural reaction he felt to her touch.

"Can you help me take off your clothes?"

Anakin paused to take a deep breath and nodded wordlessly. Padmé began carefully unbuckling his belt, her hands guided by his as she divested him of the leather tabards and, subsequently, of his outer tunic. Anakin bent to quickly rid himself of his high leather boots and paused before hesitantly raising his arms in order to take off the thin under tunic. Padmé helped him to pull the light garment over his head, making him bend, so she would be able to reach it and pull it over his head.

Padmé paused to admire the elegantly muscled lines of his long and lean torso, before her hands set to divest him of his pants. When her small fingers made brief contact with the front of his trousers, he almost jerked away. The pants pooled around his ankles and she moved to remove his last article of clothing. She deliberately moved the thin material of his undershorts over his hips, pausing to take note of his half-hard manhood as it jumped out of its confinement and bobbed proudly before her. Though not being an expert on such things, she could tell it was certainly of above average size, which kind of made her think about the part of their lovemaking she wasn't very looking forward to.

He stood there, gulping audibly, feeling nervous under her intense scrutiny. She decided she liked what she saw and it exceeded her expectations, he really did look splendid naked. Many women said there is nothing beautiful about a man's body but they haven't seen her very virile husband, the Chosen One, who happened to stand before her as on the day he was born.

Lifting her hand and slightly pushing him on the chest, she made him sit on the edge of the bed to watch her revealing. Hypnotized by the deliberate moves of her fingers, Anakin watched as she slowly, tortuously unclasped the tie holding her robe together, letting it slither around her body to the floor. A sudden blush overcame her as well, because the awed stare Anakin was giving her bare body was enough to make her squirm and rub her thighs together.

When she thought his mouth would fall open, Padme took a few steps to stand between his legs, taking his face in her hands and stroking. He immediately nuzzled into her touch, looking at her from behind those ridiculously long lashes. She erased the gap between them and moved to kiss him deeply, hands getting lost in his hair, grabbing his neck for support and climbing into his lap, careful not to touch his now fully erect length. He aided her by gently holding her by the hips, right hand instinctively moving to embrace her back, until a sharp hiss from Padmé interrupted their kiss. Anakin looked downright petrified, realizing, he might have hurt her with his metal hand, or somehow made her uncomfortable. Padme offered a sympathetic smile.

"It's just my back, the scars are still bit sensitive, it's not you." She murmured and was about to resume their explorations of each other when Anakin halted her.

"Show me – show me how to touch you."

Smiling, Padme took his right hand in both of hers and before guiding it to her lips, she studied the metal appendage closely. Sadly for him, she decided to make him feel comfortable with the hand touching her. She kissed it gently and nuzzled into it. The smooth pad of his metal fingers gently, sensually ran over the fullness of her lower lip, continuing carefully around the features of her face, gently tracing her cheekbones and nose, before coming to rest on her shoulder, mapping the area around her delicate collar bones. She pushed him lower, and made him cup her small, round breast, thumb briefly brushing over her pert nipple, making shivers run along her spine. He gained enough confidence and her approval to move his hand on his own, skimming her small ribcage, around her waist and finally, to touch her smooth belly, his face bearing a mask of determination, taking the task of exploring her body very seriously. Simultaneously, they shared a look, knowing what was supposed to come next. Padmé moved further into his lap, eliciting a sharp intake of breath from Anakin, as she squirmed in his lap, finally touching him. Her lips gently nibbling his cheek and neck, the next thing Anakin felt was her hands, gently skimming over his clenched torso muscles. Her nails were gently scraping, touch barely there, yet it reduced him to a light shaking, anticipating the next path of her hands, they came to stop at his groin, she eyed him briefly before lightly brushing her thumb over the exposed head of his shaft, earning a deep moan for her efforts.

"Oh, Force…I."

Deciding not to push him, Padmé kissed him briefly on lips and moved from his lap to lay in the center of their giant bed. Anakin felt the loss of her heat as the cool air brushed against his oversensitive skin. Propping herself among the soft pillows, she smiled reassuringly and lightly stretched her hand, indicating him to move to her embrace.

Not hesitating, Anakin crawled over her and remaining propped on his arms he took the sign as if it was okay to lay on top of her. He was heavy, but his weight felt comforting, making her safe and warm. Somehow she managed to maneuver him to rest his hips in the cradle of her pelvis and looking into his widened eyes, she soothingly ran her hand over his hard, clenched torso, down to trail the light hair on his belly to reach his erection brushing against her thigh. She took the throbbing member gently into her hand and he instinctively bucked, squirming underneath her touch. Impatient herself, she began to gently ease the head of him into her tight, wet opening. They both watched, with avid fascination, the joining of their bodies.

Pulling her hand away, she relied on him to finish what she started and tried to roll her hips to make him push deeper, until a sharp pain from the stretching of her walls prevented her from moving. As he was moving deeper into her, she thought she wouldn't be able to take all of him and her face contorted into a painful grimace. Pausing in his movements, Anakin noted the tensed features of her beautiful face, panicking that he hurt her somehow. Her nails were digging into his shoulders, and she was biting her lip to keep from whimpering.

"You okay?" He murmured worriedly.

Padmé only nodded her head in compliance and relaxing, she moved her hips to signal her readiness for him to take her fully. Anakin tried, a bit clumsily, to break the barrier that was preventing him to reach any further and it only had her gasp some more. Feeling embarrassed for his incompetence, she stilled him and looked him in the eye.

"Just...do it fast." She whispered into his shoulder, but he didn't look convinced. "I trust you." And only then he complied by pushing his hips into her quickly, eliciting a sharp whimper, muffled by his shoulder. Her pain screamed at him through the Force and he almost wanted to pull out but Padmé's thighs held him close. She just needed some time to overcome the pain and adjust to the feeling of having something so big inside of her like this. He kissed her tenderly and he was the one soothing her now.

"I'm sorry." Murmuring apologetically into her cheek.

Brushing her hand absentmindedly through his golden strands, Padmé shook her head, the pain lessening and becoming bearable, she regained her composure. She instantly grabbed for his face, and kissed him passionately, urging him to start moving.

The first few thrusts of his hips were clumsy and not very smooth, the tip of him bumping painfully against her womb. Gradually, with the help of her hands, he began to slowly find some rhythm, his thrusts steadier. Anakin braced himself so he was not crushing her and could watch her face, as they did this. His face bore a mask of utter concentration, features contorting into a pained grimace, almost as if each movement hurt, but in fact, it was just too intense. Padmé imagined, how acute it must have been for him, with his immense connection to the Force, he was sure to feel the sensations twice as much as she. She felt him began to tremble as he turned his face to the side, allowing Padme to kiss the side of his cheek and neck, nuzzling and letting her throat escape strangled gasps. She couldn't help but look down at their hips meeting to see him slide in and out of her, teetering so close on the edge. Anakin's groans were becoming louder and as she was almost feeling something beginning to shift, Anakin suddenly began twitching inside her and throbbing, releasing all too soon.

He groaned almost painfully and Padme watched his reaction, fascinated and out of breath herself. This was it?

The confirmation was Anakin's tired collapsing on her, it was almost as if he had no strength in his body left, like a puppet having its strings broken. While a part of her felt unsatisfied, a sudden tenderness overcame her when he started murmuring quiet apologies into her neck. She heard it was natural in males their first time and actually, he lasted far longer than was expected and rationally, she knew there would be next times. Many, many next times to practise and become better lovers to each other. Right now, she was happy she has given him probably the biggest pleasure he's ever experienced, judging by his breathing that couldn't be calmed and the slight shaking she felt in his powerful frame, pressed so tightly atop of her. Hands that were previously scratching were now gently stroking over his sweaty back, soothingly sinking into his short golden curls.

Having recovered sufficiently from his height, Anakin carefully pulled out of her body and surprisingly began to place tiny fluttering kisses on her face, finally reaching her lips, long fingers moved rebellious curls out of her face lovingly.

"I want to make it up to you." He murmured, determined.

Padme let her half-lidded eyes fall on the perfect features of his face, illuminated by this beautiful Nabooian night, the filter of light fell on the curve of his full lips and she longed to feel them on her body again, touching, exploring and pleasing her.

Her thumb received an incredibly sweet kiss as it ran over his mouth. Her gaze still fixed on his lips, she dared him. "Then prove it, Anakin."

His first response to her prompt was to attach his lips on her neck and while it felt wonderful, she couldn't ignore the ache she felt in her chest, as her breasts were being ignored for too long.

Still busy with kissing all around her neck and shoulders, Padme guided Anakin's hands to fully cup her areolas in his large hands, his touch seemed somewhat unsure. Soon, his hands were accompanied by a sensation of his moist lips nibbling their way across her chest, not wasting time and moving down to her belly. His tongue ventured out and teasingly circled around her belly button, eliciting a tiny giggle from Padme, who was by now gripping his hair softly. From there, Anakin paused and looked down to find her glistening wet. He was somehow taken by the sight, yet he ignored the impatient twitching of his manhood and rubbed the aching hardness against the sheets.

When nothing happened for too long, from the corner of her eye, Padme saw him pondering about how to proceed. Her palm ran lovingly over his brow and she began to instruct him tentatively. The first touch of his tongue on her mound sent her head flying backwards into the pillows. The purring sound emanating deep from her throat was a sign he was doing well. His licks were tentative, all the while watching her reactions, what made her breath hitch and his loving enthusiasm seemed to make up for the lack of technique and experience. He felt the first fluttering when Padme softly whimpered his name and he was sure he's never heard a more beautiful sound, combined with a view of her delicate features scrunched up in ecstasy. When she eventually got her release, she felt so wonderfully relaxed, loved and sleepy and her new husband was right there, kissing the insides of her thighs, coaxing out the aftershocks of her climax.

Moving from between her thighs, he came to face her and lovingly tender, he ran the back of his left hand over her flushed cheek, smiling gently. His touch was making her fall asleep and the wonderful relaxed way she felt certainly contributed to her lethargy, but insistent twitching against her leg reminded her about Anakin and how uncomfortable he must be feeling.

He was painfully hard and she imagined herself staying this aroused without experiencing a release herself. Although he didn't seem to mind staying this way, Padme simply reached between their naked bodies and started timidly stroking his cock. Still looming over her, Anakin's hips began to undulate in time with her strokes. Moaning deeply into her shoulder as the stroking motion of her hand intensified, he began to nudge her legs apart, yearning to be inside her when he came.

"Can I be inside you? Please, I need to feel you..."

The plea, although completely unnecessary, felt so erotic to her and she readily complied, spreading her legs far apart and never removing her hand from him, she pushed him inside, coating him in her wetness. His thrusts were now gliding smoothly, partially because she was practically soaking and the sound of hips meeting hips was very audible.

It did not take him long to release his seed inside her. He collapsed once more into the softness of her bosom and as tired as they were after such a drain of energy, they still managed to roll into a more comfortable position with Padmé resting her head on his chest, ready to fall asleep as they were, in each other's arms...

- The End -