By, Ash C.
ash1107@hotmail.com
Hitomi walked into her bathroom and stared into the mirror. Her hair
was in a disheveled mess, her face looked tired and pale and, she had strikingly
blood-shot eyes. But, she hadn't come in just to look at her wretched reflection.
She reached up to the mirror and pulled gently on it so smoothly swung
open. Prescription bottles off all kinds neatly lined up on all the shelves
of the inside of the cabinet. She reached up to a nearly empty one and
opened it, quickly she glanced inside of it, three small, round, white
pills were piled on top of each other in the bottom corner.
"Only three pills…damn." She muttered quietly to herself. Then she
quickly grabbed one and shoved it into her mouth, took a paper cup, filled
it with water and swallowed the pill in one gulp.
Hitomi out of the bathroom and turned on the radio, so it played softly,
a welcomed noise in her deathly silent apartment. She fell back onto her
full size bed and stared out the window, momentarily glancing at the random
pigeon that flew by. Her thoughts lingered on their feathers than on to
the reason she was taking those thrice-cursed pills.
"Van" she thought angrily and sorrowfully. He was the reason because
of those pills; if I had never met him I would've never had to go to therapy,
and would have to live on those pills. Then she sat up, pulled her legs
into an 'Indian style position' and slightly bent forward she leaned her
head on her hand,
"It was a clean break when I left Fanelia for the last time…. I should've
been able to live my life perfectly" she spoke out loud.
"But, the visions wouldn't stop" she said sadly and tear slid down
her cheeks. It was always the same vision over, and over again.
It would begin with a vision of Van, older of course and much more attractive.
She would always smile to herself when she thought of this though, a secret
place in her heart would always hurt. Then my vision would fast-forward
a bit and then next I would see him getting married to a beautiful woman,
her hair was long and silky with a bluish tint. Their faces would clearly
show the love they had for each other, and the ceremony would then fast
forward to Van sitting outside and small boy with black hair possessively
cling to him. Then the vision would end.
Sure, she was okay with it the first time, 'yeah right, I was okay with
it?' she thought to herself 'I cried for a week straight it seems'. Van
felt her grief and his image would appear and try to comfort her, sending
soothing messages of concern to her heart because they couldn't vocally
talk when he would visit her as a hologram. Hitomi though, never opened
up and talked about the vision and slowly she broke off the connection
that kept her and Van linked. Hitomi, at that time thought her visions
would end, but instead they came back. Not different ones but the same
one, over, and over again. She would usually consider herself lucky if
she could make it through the day without having the vision more than twice.
Then slowly they made her crazy and her friends took her to a psychologist.
After a few sessions with the psychologist she was classified a manic-depressive
and was given her first bottle of the 'pills'. She was instructed to take
them when she felt calm. The pills always made her feel better she slowly
admitted and they also at least stopped the visions. Hitomi now had days
upon end without the vision and no other disturbances.
Hitomi stood up and walked around to her dresser and then without notice,
her legs gave out on her and she fell to the floor. She picked herself
off the floor a bit and put a hand on the low dresser to steady herself.
She bit her bottom lip as the tears slowly trickled down her face and at
that moment she knew that her life was over, she wanted to die.
Yeah!!! I'm finished with the first chapter!! I know it's short but,
you'll understand um, consider this Chapter 1: part1. Well here are some
references to clear some misunderstandings.
1: The Pills are actually "Lithium carbonate" which are usually used
when someone has bipolar disorder and manic depression.
2: Yes, Hitomi is a manic-depressive… I always wanted to mess around with her mind! O.o
3: The last part was when Hitomi was experiencing vertigo.