"Tick Tock" – A Hunger Games Fan Fiction
It had taken awhile for District 12 to be cleared of the sights and smells of death. Gradually, the ashes had been washed away by sombre rains and the shacks had been resurrected to be grander than they once had been. Upon making the decision whether or not to share the wealth of Panem equally, Katniss had voted with a resounding 'no'. It was not her intention to keep District 12 in the dark, but the idea of living a Capitol lifestyle was repulsive to her. Peeta had objected originally but a compromise had been reached in time. District 12 would no longer be poor, but they would remain a smaller district, resembling a quaint village of well-equipped cottages and shops.
It was nothing like her home here had been, but the benefits of the old District 12 were well reflected in the new one, she thought. The cottages were built around the town's square, some made of wood and others of sturdier red brick. All of them had front porches and were big enough to accommodate an entire family comfortably. Peeta had seen to that, much to Katniss' dismay.
At the center of every district, stood a war memorial resembling a mockingjay. She had had no influence in their building and every time she passed through the square to visit Peeta at work, her skin crawled and chills ran through her body at the sight of it. She hated the constant reminder.
One thing Katniss could appreciate were the boundaries around the district. There were none. Sure, every inhabited area was surrounded by a short fence to keep wild animals out of the district, but there were gated openings every two hundred yards for people the explore the forests surrounding twelve. They never did, they usually just played in the grassy hills, but Katniss was finally allowed to control her freedom. One of these gates was situated directly outside of her house, built very close to where her old house had once stood.
Katniss and Peeta's house was a two-story wonder compared to her old home. She felt that her new home was too big with four bedrooms and a huge kitchen for Peeta to bake, but if she forgot about the upstairs that seemed to expect guests and children, the house was bearable.
Down the hall from the kitchen, Peeta and Katniss were asleep in their bed.
Squinting as she opened her eyes, Katniss could feel the radiant sun warm her bare arms. Slowly, she became aware of her surroundings. She was wearing her undergarments, and Peeta, asleep behind her was wearing the same. She could feel his bare chest pressed against her back, his arm resting under her head and his other arm around her stomach.
No nightmares.
Sighing lightly as to not wake Peeta, she closed her eyes again, desperately wanting to close the drapes and shut out the beams of light on her face for a few more minutes. The weather would be fair for later if she wanted to go hunting, but all she wanted was to stay wrapped in Peeta's arms for the time being.
She had not heard him stir when he whispered into her ear, "Stop pretending to be asleep, Katniss."
Katniss rolled her eyes, "You knew?" she retorted.
"I was awake before you,' he answered simply. Katniss cautiously turned over to her other side to face Peeta. He kissed her lightly.
"Good morning," he smiled as he traced the contours of her hip, moving a hand around to pull her thigh up onto his.
She laughed, "No. You're going to be late."
Peeta sighed, "Fine," and put his free hand on her face, kissing her again before the two rose for the day. They each put on warmer clothes over their minimal layers before heading down the hallway for breakfast. Katniss pulled out some milk and jam from blueberries she had picked and spread it onto some bread from Peeta's bakery. They ate silently, listening to the birds outside of the window sing-back melodies whistled from around the district.
Katniss looked up at him, "When will you be home tonight?" she asked.
Peeta thought before answering, "Between six and seven. I am accompanying some of the deliveries today," he replied, "why, did you have something planned?" he looked hopeful despite his knowledge that Katniss was horrible at planning.
"It's beautiful outside," she said as she looked out of the window longingly, "no, I'm going hunting today, and I just wanted to know."
Peeta sighed and slowed his voice cautiously as he questioned her, "So, you won't be cleaning out one of the smaller rooms upstairs? You know, just in case you finally decide that we're read-".
Katniss cut him off, "Peeta," she said warningly, her voice ringing in the silence, "I am not ready for that." She looked up at his face, her voice getting louder as she talked, "How many nights do you wake up, still screaming? How many nights do I do the same? Do you really think it's a good idea to raise a child when you have to hold on to the backs of chairs to ward off thoughts of wanting to kill me?!" her voice was getting louder still, "I can't get over the idea that it's just not safe for us to do that. You cannot possibly expect to do it alone. If it happens by accident, Peeta, I swear, I'll carry it, but I would never want to subject you to raising it with me being distant for the rest of my life!"
Her voice dropped off, a ball of fear wadding in her throat, threatening to suffocate her. She began again, her voice a barely audible whisper, "I'm scared that I can't love it."
Peeta looked at her, shocked, "Katniss, don't be ridiculous. You know perfectly well my nightmares are not about that!" He stopped talking at the look on her face and continued more carefully, "Katniss, when are you going to realize that we're not at war anymore? Children grow up privileged now with the space and freedom to play and more importantly, food to eat and parents who are not afraid they're going to die at any minute. Katniss, they have parents who love them."
"Love them?!" Katniss yelled at him, "Peeta's that's been your dream not mine. I love you. I know that much. The only child I am certain I loved was Prim. How did that turn out? TELL ME!"
Peeta barely moved as he took a small breath and whispered to her, "It's been fourteen years Katniss. Fourteen. Look, I am not going to argue this anymore. All that I know is that you love me, you said it just now, and that I love you." His voice sounded a million miles away as he got up and moved toward the hallway towards the door, "That's reason enough for me."
Saying no more, Peeta picked up his jacket and a key to the bakery before vanishing out the front door. Katniss stared at the door, the sound of the lock clicking shut echoed in her ears.
Placing both hands on the counter in front of her, she leaned against it and lowered her head, inhaling sharply as she tried to block out images of children exploding at the hands of silver parachutes. The vivacity of her flashbacks had not been muted over the years.
Three minutes later, she dared to move. Leaving the dishes where they were, she rushed down the hall into their room, mind racing to lose herself in the forest. She pulled on her hunting clothes, grabbed her father's old jacket and turned to rush out of the room.
Suddenly, she stopped short of the hallway, catching her hand on the doorframe to stop herself as her eyes rested on a small wooden box laid carefully on the dresser. Her anger subsided momentarily as she turned to it and reached out her hands to lift the lid off the homemade box. Inside were two items, sitting in the velvet-covered padding; a golden locket that she ran her fingers over, touching the cool metal that contained photos of her family and Gale. Her brow furrowed as she passed over it, leaving it where it was before moving on to the second item. Peeta's pearl hugged the corners of the box, glistening slightly in the midmorning light. She sighed, remembering receiving it for the first time and her brows relaxed. Quickly, she picked it up and snapped the lid of the box closed before rushing out of the room and out the front door as she tucked it neatly into the breast pocket of her father's hunting jacket.
Katniss hit the ground running, filling her lungs with the cool morning air. The early sun was already warming her skin as she jogged toward a break in the fence. Clicking the gate shut behind her, she stopped at the edge of the meadow, to decide which way to go to clear her head. West, away from the rising sun would take her to magnificent channels of rivers and large stone dams, but it would be dark there, buried deep within the confines of the forest. East, would take her to rolling hills and occasional rocky cliffs and drop offs, but today was a day Katniss did not feel like being exposed, so she set off jogging directly in front of her into the heart of the forest.
A few yards into the forest line, she freed her bow and quiver of arrows, and slung them over her shoulder. She did not need to hunt to stay well fed, but her old habit comforted her.
Climbing over some logs, Katniss walked up an angled, fallen tree and balanced herself against another tree. She drew an arrow and placed it in her bow, and drew back the string, feeling it brush against her lips. Inhaling, she waited. As expected, a family of brown, forest rabbit bounded out of their hole, scattering. With ease, Katniss let out her breath and released the arrow, piercing one through the eye. Accuracy was not something she had lost with age.
Cleaning the rabbit , she started a fire and fashioned a quick spit for it to cook. Leaving it to smoke, she wandered a few yards to a small stream lined with moss and flowers. Digging for water roots, she smiled fondly at a memory of picking katniss tubers with her father.
Before returning to her spit, Katniss, now completely at peace in her surroundings, stopped at the sight of the flowers lining the riverbanks.
Primroses.
It was not long before she had fallen to her knees, running her fingers along the silky petals. She picked one and brought it back with her to her spit. Mindlessly tending to her lunch, Katniss continued to run her fingers along the soft petals. The colouring reminded her of Peeta, the flower of Prim and eventually, her final memories of her. Peeta, dead children, the very thoughts she had come here to escape, enraged her. She had come here to clear her head. She had come here for peace.
Gripping her hair tightly in her hands, she pushed her head between her legs and rocked away the images. Shaking off the worst of her tremors, she looked up and felt a sudden pang of loneliness. Now, all she craved was for Peeta's arms to be wrapped around her, keeping her safe. Instead, she found no one. Fumbling with her father's jacket, she reached in and removed Peeta's pearl from the pocket. She gripped it tightly, remembering how it had felt to be in his arms only hours prior. As she relaxed, she held the pearl to her lips and traced their edges with the smooth surface before placing it back in her father's jacket. Her rabbit was finished, so she collected her belongings and wrapped up the cooked meat and roots for the remainder of her day.
Now wandering aimlessly through the forest, Katniss gave up trying to fight her thoughts. Had Peeta been right, this morning? Had he been right fourteen years ago?
"You're going to make a great mother."
The thought echoed very loudly in her head. All she could feel was guilt over her treatment of Peeta over breakfast. The look in his eyes was still fresh in her mind and it pained her to remember how cruel her words had been.
Suddenly, the voice of Haymitch was all she could think about,
"You could live a thousand lifetimes…"
The thought brought a huge lump in the back of her throat and she swallowed hard to get rid of it. Unsuccessful, Katniss looked around her. She needed out. The forest thinned about one hundred yards to her right and she took off running, desperate to see the sky and feel the sun on her skin. About ten yards away from the edge of the forest, she noticed a drop-off in the land and skidded to a halt. The drop wasn't far, she could probably scale a few rocks to get down, but instead, she sat along the edge of the small cliff and looked out over the edge. The rock she was sitting on was large and flat, big enough for two people. It reminded her of Gale.
It was true, she did miss him, and Peeta knew about this, but the fourteen-year-old silence was still a raw wound. She understood why he had left, but she still did not understand the complete silence. Perhaps she did not miss him exactly, but rather their easy, effortless friendship. A life without Gale, but also without oppression or a battered life with Gale and their respective families; these were the options the war had left her with.
For many years, the thought had confused Katniss, but with Peeta by her side, a life free from their old Capitol was worth a lifetime of silence. Still, the simple nature of a friendship, as she had had with Gale, not having to worry about feelings or dead children, appealed to her.
Further surrendering to her thoughts, Katniss let her mind take her back to memories hunting and sharing food with him. Her smile turned grimace as she tracked time. Watching Gale whipped, kissing him, fighting in war with him, watching him beg her to shoot him.
How simple that decision to die had been for him. Anything for Katniss, anything for her life, even death. Normally, the idea would have disgusted her, but this time, her thoughts turned curious as they shifted abruptly to Peeta, who she knew would have done the same, who she could remember, had asked time and time again to die for her. She hated them for it, but she knew she would have done the same too.
The thought triggered an answer to her situation with Peeta. She had vowed to save Peeta's life over her own. She had dedicated a portion of her life to the preservation of Peeta's life once too.
Suddenly Katniss could see having a child with Peeta in a completely new light, and with no immediate threat to Peeta's life or her own, she had thought her job was finished. She knew this was not how Peeta would want her to come to this conclusion, but she did not care, it made sense to her. In her mind, she was a hypocrite. Saving his life on countless occasions, yet denying his life continuation? No, she would not have this.
She doubled her thoughts back; no this was definitely not how Peeta would want it, but he did not need to know. She was finally willing, and that was all that mattered.
She picked up her belongings and whispered a silent goodbye to Gale before shoving him into a corner of her mind. Katniss set off for home at a determined jog. As she made her way out of the forest, she decided to visit Peeta at the bakery. She needed to apologize, and it couldn't wait so many hours until his return home.
The thought of actually having children still scared her, but the defeated look in Peeta's eyes sent her head spinning out of pain and grief. An apology was not enough, but it would have to do for now.
She settled these thoughts as she crashed through the tree line. Well past noon, Katniss made her way into the main square. It was busier than usual for this time of day, and she blended in with the crowds of people shopping, receiving only a few smiles in recognition. She did not like the attention, but whether she liked it or not, she and Peeta were still minor celebrities in District 12, as well as most of Panem. The attention was not obtrusive, but noticeable nonetheless.
Hurriedly, she passed the mockingjay statue in the middle of the square, pressing her lips together, and giving it a curt nod. She did not need an opportunity to reconsider, not now. Rounding a corner, she set her sights upon her destination, and immediately stopped moving.
Opening the door of the bakery was a tall man with dark hair wearing a worn leather jacket. Katniss squeezed her eyes shut and shook her head, but found that she had not been hallucinating when she blinked her eyes open. In the man's arms, he carried a little girl, no more than two years old, wearing a tiny red dress and her hair in two high braids. The memory with her father jolted every nerve ending in her body and she took off running around to the side of the bakery to peer, unnoticed, into the small, dusty window.
Peeta was working in the front, displaying his icing talents when the man and his daughter came in through the door. The man set the girl down on her wobbly feet and she immediately set off toward the back of the counter. Peeta looked up and smiled a hello at the man before immediately dropping what was in his hands. He bent his knees, lowered himself down to the girl's level, and stretched out his arms towards her. A huge animated smile lit up his face and the girl laughed outrageously and losing her concentration and balance, fell into his arms. He picked her up over his head with ease before bringing her back down to settle on his hip.
Katniss looked at the little girl dancing and clapping in his arms; her father was laughing too. Peeta and the man spoke with each other before setting the girl down and helping her sell a loaf of bread to her father. The girl seemed delighted, but smiled even wider as Peeta offered her a sugar cookie and turned down the father's attempt to pay him. The father called his daughter and she wobbled over to him and held his hand as she left. The man turned to thank Peeta, who reciprocated, and the little girl turned to wave at him while nibbling on her cookie. His face contorted into a goofy grin before it settled into the loving smile Katniss knew so well. The girl smiled and turned away as she left the store, leaving the door to close on its own.
Katniss looked back at Peeta, now alone in the front of his store. His smile was fading into a look of desperation and longing. His head hung for a moment before he inhaled sharply and continued his work, a weak, exhausted look painted onto his face.
Katniss sunk herself below the window and into the ground, burying her face in her hands. She let the heart-wrenching pain of guilt wash over her in waves without putting up a fight. Haymitch had been right. She did not deserve Peeta as selfish as she was. She sunk lower against the wall, waiting for her self-doubt and fear to run its course through her veins. Whether she was afraid or not, or whether she deserved Peeta or not, Peeta deserved to have a child with the person he loved.
Katniss choked out a small cry before taking a breath to rise and set off for home. She was not ready, but as she thought about it, no one was ever, entirely ready for the challenges of having a baby. Nearing home, Katniss resolved to surprise Peeta. She had no idea how, and she would feel utterly stupid trying to plan out something romantic for him, but he liked that kind of gesture, and Katniss had no interest in only pleasing herself.
Bounding up the front porch stairs, Katniss opened their front door and headed to the kitchen. She placed her uneaten lunch on a plate and ate it quickly, savouring the familiar, homey, smoked taste. Finished, Katniss went down the hall to their rooms and changed her clothes, taking great care in placing his pearl back into the box. She settled on a T-shirt and shorts in an effort to keep her look simple. If everything went properly, they would not be on for much longer anyway. The old clock on the nightstand clicked as it hit 5:03 p.m. She did not have much time.
"Surprise him," she whispered to herself.
Katniss quickly removed her clothes and laid down on the bed. Fumbling with the arrangement of the bed sheet, she caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror. The white bed sheets made the worst of her still-present burn marks glow against her tanned skin. The haunting image revolted Katniss. She threw herself out of bed and pulled on her clothes, covering the worst of her scars once again.
Lost for ideas, Katniss slumped down onto the bed again. She thought briefly of pretending to be asleep, hopefully prompting Peeta to join her, but she shrugged it off when she figured she would probably fall asleep before he came home. The room looked dead of possibility, so she rose from the bed and returned to the kitchen. The kitchen held as much promise as the bedroom had, and Katniss sat herself at the table to think.
Her lack of ideas was not surprising to Katniss, as planning was not exactly her forte. Perhaps she would just sit and wait for Peeta, explain to him, and work from there. From the table, she spotted a candle and got up to get it from atop the fridge. The candle was cupcake scented and she wrinkled her nose. She hated the thing, which had been a gift to Peeta from a neighbour who originally lived in District 1. Peeta always joked about the smell of it reminding him of an incident at the bakery when Katniss and him had stayed late to finish an order and she had exploded a bag of icing, covering virtually every surface with a soft orange paste. She was not too fond of the memory, but she always blushed as she remembered how Peeta had cleaned her up. She laughed to herself and allowed feelings of excitement to flutter in her stomach.
After ten minutes of sitting behind the candle, Katniss began to feel stupid and overly dramatic; like one of the new shows that aired each afternoon on the new television screen they had been given. Katniss sighed and blew out the candle, clearly frustrated with her failures. She would have to do this another night. She stared at the candle, the smoke making her eyes sting before she capped it and put it back angrily. It had been making her head hurt, anyway.
Katniss opened the fridge for a drink of water to clear her head. As she closed the door again, a piece of paper with Peeta's handwriting on it fell off. The note was entitled 'Store's Favourite'. Katniss read the list of ingredients and looked at the sketch before concluding that it was a recipe for his renowned sugar cookies. The memory of them from before war sent a shiver down her spine and she put the paper back under the magnet on the fridge door.
As she turned around, an idea struck her. Why not surprise Peeta by trying to bake? He had always wanted her to try, but Katniss believed it was solely because her failed attempts amused him. She had already resolved to completely step out of her comfort zone today and this hardly seemed to be difficult in comparison.
'Maybe he'll enjoy me covered in flour," she joked with herself.
Determined to not let something so simple beat her, she pulled out all the ingredients and set them on the counter in front of her. She let her thoughts roll through her head as she measured out ingredients and tossed them messily into a bowl – Peeta had taught her that much about these cookies. As her fingers moved awkwardly around her mess, she thought about Peeta and how he would react to her decision. He must be mad, but Katniss couldn't see him objecting to her advances. She blushed and moved her thoughts along; at least she would have a good evening. The thought sounded silly.
How many kids would Peeta make her have? Would one be enough for him? She did not like the answer. What would they look like? Like their father, or more like their mother? The word sent alarm bells blaring in her head, but she pushed on.
What would Haymitch think? Ha! She laughed aloud at the image of Haymitch with a drink in his hand, slapping Peeta on the back and making a crude comment about buns in ovens. Her smile turned frown as her thoughts took an abrupt shift to how they would raise a child. Would they tell them about the Games? They would have to. They would have to relive their lives in order to explain who they were. They would have to know. But when? How young was too young? Twelve?
The complexity of the situation sent her heart racing and explosions detonated in her head and she dropped the cup she had been using to spread flour across the counter. In a plume of powder, Katniss covered her ears and crouched down, leaning against the counter. She squeezed her eyes tight and held herself in Peeta's absence until her tremors came to a stop. Silently, she cursed him for bringing up this discussion today.
A loud click and creak at the front door snapped Katniss out of her condition and she stood up quickly, examining her mess. Flour was everywhere and the mound of dough sat in a very unattractive lump on the counter. Her head turned in the direction of the front hall at the sound of Peeta's voice.
"Katniss, are you home?"
Adrenaline rushed through her and she glanced back at the clock; 6:30.
Right on time.
"Kitchen," she responded abruptly.
Time began to move very slowly as she heard Peeta set down his bags and begin walking down the hall towards her.
Tick Tock
She looked back at her mess; there was no time to clean.
Tick Tock
Panicking, Katniss picked up the rolling pin and began to roll out the dough roughly. She clearly did not have the time to act on any preconceived notions.
Tick Tock
She shook her head. Planning an evening with Peeta, what had she been thinking?
Tick Tock
Peeta's footsteps grew closer and she continued to roll the dough out with a practiced, blank expression on her face.
Tick…
Peeta's face emerged from around the corner of the doorway, testing the air. Katniss could see his expression out of the corner of her eye; confusion mixed with delight. He broke out with a light laugh and Katniss brought her head up to look at him. He was dressed in his black work pants, which were, like her, covered in flour and his casual shirt remained unbuttoned over his baking shirt. She swallowed as she cleared her head of any remaining ideas.
"What's funny?" she asked a little too sternly.
He stopped smiling, "Why are you baking sugar cookies?" he asked.
Katniss got defensive, "Do I need a reason, Peeta?"
"Katniss…" he responded skeptically.
"Okay! I'm sorry," she began, "I was horrible this morning."
Based on his expression, her response had not been the answer he had expected.
"So, you did this for me?" he asked, sounding slightly hopeful. "You didn't need to."
"I," she struggled to find words Peeta would like, "I wanted to."
Peeta smiled, "Will you let me show you something then?" he asked, walking over without waiting for an answer. Katniss froze, still leaning over the counter, hands over the rolling pin. Peeta put his parcel down, on one edge of the counter and walked until he was directly behind Katniss, bringing the smell of warm bread with him. She stopped breathing, confusing thoughts of anger, panic and attraction rushing through her mind. He placed his hands on each of her shoulders and slowly ran them down her arms, making her shiver. He stopped when his hands rested over hers, over the handles of the rolling pin.
He tucked his head in beside hers and spoke, "If you do it like this," he began, leaning into her as he moved the pin forwards in her hands, "they'll bake more evenly." His breath was hot on her neck, but she fought off the urge to shiver again. Peeta leaned backward, drawing Katniss into him as he rolled the pin in another direction.
"Oh really?" she questioned, cautiously.
"Mhm," Peeta whispered.
Katniss couldn't clear her head and it angered her to feel helpless and unprepared against Peeta.
"Surprise him," her thoughts echoed.
Peeta continued to rock back and forth against the counter, but he seemed to be genuinely interested in the cookies in front of them. This further filled her with a strange kind of anger. Katniss could barely keep her focus pressed against him, but she could clearly feel that he was not even slightly bothered. She rolled her eyes, taking pleasure in that Peeta could not see her do so.
"Take advantage of this," her thoughts screamed. If she couldn't have control, she would have to create her own, and quickly.
"You can't plan these moments to save your life," she thought, "but spontaneity, that you can do," encouraged her thoughts.
Do it. Now.
Katniss felt Peeta's hands loosen around hers and his body retreat. Free of his hold, she took no time to recognize her chance.
Now.
…Tock.
Slipping her hands from under Peeta's, she quickly brought her arms into her chest and whirled around to face Peeta. Before he could react, Katniss had placed her hands on his chest and had pushed him angrily against the back counter, making the abandoned dishes rattle. She crashed her lips onto his and kissed him deeply. Peeta's hands were raised in shocked at the side of his face, clearly surprised at the turn of events.
Katniss opened her eyes and broke from the kiss and put her lips to his ear, "What," she breathed heavily, "can't you handle me?" she continued, teasing him.
Katniss traced his lines with her finger through his shirt to where his belt remained intact. Ignoring it, she continued and rested her hand over his pants to feel him. Peeta raised his eyebrows and Katniss bent her knee and drew it up to his hip. Peeta's expression changed from shocked to devious as he grinned and lowered his hands, placing them intertwined in her hair and on the small of her back. Using his own lips, he opened hers and silenced their breathing.
Taking a step into her, he pushed her back, slamming her against the other counter with the cookies. Katniss could feel an immediate shift in Peeta's thoughts and mood under her hand. He pushed her harder against the counter, leaning her back far enough to push the items off the counter with a free hand. Smiling as he kissed her, Peeta slid his hands down her back, cupping his hands under her and lifting her onto the counter.
Katniss raised her knees and wrapped her legs around his waist, forcing him closer to her. They both smiled through their kisses before Katniss lifted her arms and let Peeta remove her shirt, tossing it carelessly to the floor. She threw her head back, leaning back on her hands as Peeta kissed her collarbone, working his way to her stomach. Before he could successfully undo the tie on her pants, Katniss brought her head back up, forcing Peeta to bring his face back to meet her.
Sitting up taller, she forced her own lips to meet Peeta's as she brought her hands forward to remove his shirt off his shoulders and lift his baking shirt over his head. Running her hands up from his stomach to his shoulders, she smiled at Peeta before running the tip of her tongue down the centre of his body. Peeta sighed and closed his eyes as Katniss stopped and kissed him above the top of his pants.
Katniss threw her arms around his neck and continued to busy his lips as she ran her hands through his hair. She could feel Peeta skillfully use his right hand to undo the clasp at her back while his left hand finally found the tie on her pants. Within seconds, she felt the clasp release and fabric fall to their feet. Peeta moved his hands and placed them over her breasts, moving his thumb in circles around them. Katniss felt the nerve endings in her body erupt and send pleasure coursing through her body. A familiar fire inside of her was fuelled and burned to a roar, making her crave more.
She pulled Peeta closer, causing him to lose his balance and letting go of her chest, he slammed his hands down on the counter on either side of her, forcing her down further. Katniss leaned backward and Peeta landed on top of her, her legs still wrapped around his waist. She immediately became aware of Peeta, hard beneath his pants, pressed between her open legs.
The fire growing inside of her sent purrs of encouragement to her hands as she moved them from his face down his chest to his pants. She unbuckled his pants and slid her hand in them, lowering them a few inches. Peeta laughed and grabbed her arm, moving it to around his neck. Confused, Katniss raised her back off the counter slightly and broke away to look at him, but instead of getting an answer to her confusion, she found him looking back at her with a sly grin.
Slowly, he inched his hands into the back of her untied pants and cupped underneath her. Pulling her closer, he bent over and whispered; "Hold on," into her ear. His hot breath sent a shiver down her spine and before she could recover, he lifted her from the counter, holding her forcibly against himself with ease.
Katniss gasped and tightened her grip around his waist with her legs. Peeta silenced her sound of surprise by kissing her through chuckles as he half walked, half tripped over his pants, falling rapidly from his waist as he continued down the hall to their bedroom. Katniss laughed, senses alight as she could feel her unsuspected plan working.
Stumbling through the bedroom door, Peeta ran one of his hands up her back and set her down on the bed. Katniss propped herself up on her elbows and watched Peeta plant soft kisses down her stomach, stopping above her own panty line this time. Slowly, he slipped off only her pants and left her feeling teased.
It was true that this evening had been for Peeta's benefit, but it still seemed like he was unaware of her main goal. Her thoughts muddled with her mood as she refocused on Peeta who was finally working her panties down the length of her legs. Peeta resumed kissing her until he reached the inside of her thighs.
He placed his mouth on her and Katniss let out a moan. She closed her eyes and fell backwards, arms giving out beneath her. Peeta opened his mouth and circled his tongue around her as she arched her back and moved her hips closer to him. Breathing hard, she threw her arms out behind her and cried out softly before reaching her hand to the back of Peeta's head, keeping him where he was.
Peeta gave a throaty laugh and Katniss felt his warm breath between her legs send low shockwaves out to her body as she sighed into the pleasure. Peeta raised himself from the floor to the end of the bed, his right knee between her legs, forcing them open more as he pinned Katniss to the bed and forced her breathing to stop once more.
Katniss moved her hands down Peeta's body, and she helped him kick off his pants, still tangled around his ankles. Her hand continued to move underneath the waistband dividing him from her when he began to pull away from her once again, her hand having barely reached its target. Katniss was overwhelmed with a wave of longing when she opened her eyes in disbelief to see him walking away from her into the bathroom attached to their room, her eyes never leaving his body.
A look of bewilderment crossed her face and she spoke, out of breath, "Peeta, what are you doing? Come back," she almost pleaded.
Peeta hesitated before continuing to the bathroom, disappearing behind the door. Katniss coughed out of shock and flopped backward on the bed, hands covering her face and bringing her knees together. Through the cracks between her fingers, she saw Peeta reappear in the doorway and his voice rang in the silence, "Katniss," he started, "look at me."
Katniss got up to look. He was holding a thin, small square package between his fingers. She continued to look, eyes wide as he spoke, "You made it clear this morning we would be using things like this for awhile."
So he had not figured her out yet.
"Peeta," she whispered softly in response.
He took her softness as an apology, sighing before attempting to open the package.
"Peeta!" she called out, stopping him mid-motion. She pushed herself off the bed and made her way to him, this time, confidence radiating out from her without reason.
She stopped in front of him, whispering, "Don't you see?" before imposing herself onto him. She grabbed the back of his head and forced his mouth open with hers, tracing him with her tongue and biting at his lip playfully.
"I don't want that, I want you. I want this," she whispered into his ear, sliding her hand back onto him, causing him to gasp.
"Katniss, are you doing this for me? Or for yourself?"
Katniss looked down, smiling as she shook her head lightly. She knew exactly what she had to say. Looking back up, she spoke clearly, "For us."
Peeta smiled with Katniss and they both let out a laugh of mutual relief and anxiety for their future. Peeta did not need much encouragement from Katniss anymore. He kissed her slowly and passionately before stepping into her and walking her backward toward the bed. Katniss fell backwards once again, her knees separating by the work of Peeta's hand, moving their way up her leg, his fingers slipping inside of her.
Katniss moaned and raised her hips towards him. Peeta removed his fingers and crawled forward to meet her face with his. His strong hands pinned her shoulders down and his knee forced hers further apart. Katniss reached down and put her hand on Peeta who had rested himself against her, teasing her senses.
"Peeta," she pleaded. Katniss knew she should have felt embarrassed, surrendering herself to him, but she reminded herself that this night was for him, and she would do what she needed to if it meant he would be happy. It was not as if she was not enjoying herself, either.
Peeta obliged to her and pressed himself into her, moaning as he did so. Katniss met his moans with her own before bringing his face down to hers, as he pushed himself further inside of her. Their mouths opened against each other's, the edges of lips barely touching. Their breathing was hot against their faces, frozen in place as Peeta rocked her back and forth with his movements.
Peeta brought his lips back down to meet hers, making slow work of his tongue as he increased his pace, thrusting into her. Katniss quivered and moaned as she raised her hips traitorously to meet Peeta's, each of his strokes resonating deep inside of her. Her nerves crackled like lightning and she could feel a low thunderous purr of desire and satisfaction deep in her stomach as her hips rocked against Peeta's in synchronicity.
Somewhere, he struck a spark and the fire burning in Katniss answered with fury and passion. She ran her hands over his chest, a rock under hand and through his hair before running them over the lines of her stomach and over her breasts. She arched her back again and readjusted the angle between them.
Peeta and she moved together for what seemed like hours to Katniss who had lost track of time against him. Advancing toward her moment of completion, Katniss raised her legs around Peeta's body and curled her body to fit his, aiming to contain the sensation building inside of her. As she did so, small cries escaped her lips and Peeta drew in sharp breaths.
He reached one hand to her face and held her gaze, his eyes smouldering into hers. Katniss continued to raise her hips to meet Peeta, her eyes never breaking from his as she felt a warmth begin to spread from between her legs and her entire body convulse as a feeling of tingling pleasure and dreamy relaxation coursed though her veins into each finger tip.
She let out a long moan through a smile, but was interrupted by Peeta who was now moving towards his own end as he quickened his pace briefly. Peeta could still feel her tighten around him and he moved into her once more, letting out a groan of satisfaction and pleasure. Katniss felt his release spread as he carefully thrust once more before leaving her and falling beside her onto the bed.
She could feel an entirely different warmth inside of her as she gripped her stomach thoughtfully. Peeta's hand found hers and he held it tightly, his fingers laced with hers. She turned into him and hooked her leg around his hip once again, not wanting to be alone just yet.
He ran a finger of his free hand down the side of her face and smiled out of the corner of his mouth, "We'll be alright," his voice was husky but reassuring and she kissed him, placing her own fingers along his jaw line.
Katniss could tell Peeta was falling asleep, so she unhooked her leg from his hip and pulled a sheet over them before moving closer and replacing her knee at his hip. Katniss closed her eyes and convinced Peeta to fall asleep, but she was far from tired.
When his breathing slowed, she opened her eyes and studied his face, trying to pick apart his features. Unsuccessful, she gazed into the dark room and savoured how peaceful she felt. Her fire, reduced to glowing embers, still tingled, radiating out towards her fingers from her center. She felt safe in Peeta's arms and dreaded the morning, when she would have to wake up and leave this quiet moment because, after all, fire burns brightest in the darkness.