He found her. No one believed he could, but he did it anyway. The past few days have been exhausting. But no more than the whole year. He is sure he has to bring her home. He needs to bring her home. Without her, he'll be lost. And he thought, before he went to the airport, before they were attacked, he thought that finally, she cared about him more than as just a co-worker or a very close friend. But damn, timing is a bitch. Especially their timing. And everything was screwed again. But he is with her now. He can change her mind, right? She was blaming herself, thinking, that she is the source of all evil in her world. How can she not see that she was stopping the bad guys for way too long? That she made much more good than bad. That she brought light into his life.

Maybe she was stubborn or scared of what would happen if she went with him back. Or maybe she thought she didn't deserve to be happy. Ever. His flight is the next day. He is going alone. If he leaves alone, he will carry in his mind as many memories as he can. But he is still unable to admit that these days are the last with her by his side. He is the guy who looks at the reality in front of him but refuses to accept it.

…..

"Do you want to go out to get some food or will we cook something?" Tony asked. Yes, he was lazy, but if she wants him to cook, he will do it.

"I think I could teach you one of my favorite recipes. It's traditional here, but I think you gonna love it, Tony." she said smiling. He loved that smile. He went closer to her, slightly brushing her wild hair out of her face. She was so beautiful. "I would love that." He leaned in and kissed her gently.

It was all new to them. Those small kisses meant much more than they both wanted to admit. Because if they did, it would break them.

Ziva prepared everything they needed for cooking. They were working in a sync as always. Smoothly cooperating. She couldn't help but think how this could be forever. They, together against the world. But she needed to punish herself for hurting people. She couldn't see the good inside of herself. He would make her happy and that is not was she deserves. And maybe one day, she would hurt him. And that is the last thing she wanted.

The meal was amazing. She really knew how to cook. They sat opposite eatch other, slowly swalowing delicious food. Quietly. The shared couple of looks and little smiles. Smiles full of love. They loved each other. It should be easy, but it wasn't. They were just not ment to have happy ending.

….

"You know, I can clean the kitchen without you watching me. You can take a break, Ziva." he said while he was washing the plates.

"Of cousre I know, but I have a really good view." She said, standing nex to the counter and sipping the remains of her red wine in the glass.

Tony slowly tourned around to see her. He saw her eyes filled with lust. She changed during those years he has got to know her, but sometimes, she was still that young mossad chick with fire and lust in her eyes. All he wanted was her love. But if she offered him her body, he would be a fool to reject her.

"The cleaning can wait." he said as he aproached her, taking her glass out of her hand.

"I want to kiss you, Ziva."

"You do not need a permission to do that." she said, her eyes sparking.

He wasn't sure if it was beceause of her excitement or sadness. But it didn't stop him from kissing her senseless. Holding her waist firmly and stroking her hair gently he ravished her mouth. For a second he forgot he was kissing mossad slash federal agent ninja. Still she could be so delicate and gentle.

He spent a few days in this house and he knew exactly, where the bedroom was. So he guided her there still kissing her passionatelly. Very fast they both were laying on the bed still bussy with each others mouth.

Tony was on top of her and suddenly, kisses werent enough. He needed to prove her he cannot live without her. He needed to prove her his love for her. Slowly his hand reached for her skin under her shirt. As he touched the little skin there, just under the hem, they stopped kissing. Her hands lovingly making mess of his hair. Damn, she did love his hair. As their eyes connected they both had the same question.

„We dont have to... But I think that maybe..." he was mumbling, trying to explain her that this was not about lust. This was about something much more. „All I want is you, Ziva."

„I know." she said, stroking his cheek and kissing him. Slowly. Passionatelly. With the "L" word.

"Then have me, Tony. I want you. I need you." the desperation in her eyes was enough for him.

He took down her shirt. Only her bra and necklace covering her chest. So beautiful. His hips were slightly rocking into hers, his need evidently visible. They were still very clothed but it didnt slowed down the heat between them. Ziva broke the kiss, their foreheads touching as her hands came through his muscular back and her hips rocked up. A quiet moan escaped her lips and they couldnt stop it now. Or ever. She unbottoned his shirt, carresing his chest and arms and back, every centimeter of his naked skin. He wanted to pinn her hands above her head but she was faster. His Israeli ninja. She moved her hands down on his back cupping his ass and squeezing it.

„Ziva..." he moand into her mouth.

Hearing his plead, her hands immidiatelly went to the button on his pants, opening it and reaching with her small hands inside. She stroked his through his underwear and he needed to catch a breath so he broke the kiss. He pulled her hands out and got rid of the pants very quickly as he did the same with hers. Their underwear went with the pants. Their hips were finally touching without any barrier. He kissed her once more and he pulled away to get rid of her bra. When he tossed it at the other end of the room, there was nothing else preventing them to finally have each other. Only the necklace. She reached behind her neck to take it off, but Tony stopped her.

„I said I want you, Ziva. All of you. Keep it on."

She nodded as she spreadded her legs more for him. She was ready for him. Ready to give him the last thing she hadn't yet. He rocked his cock aound her centre, feeling her wet heaven. He couldnt believe he was about to fuck, no, about to make love to her. To Ziva. Their foreheads connected as they looked into each others eyes. Her hands bussy with stroking his back and neck, his holding her hips steadilly as he slowly entered her. He was watching every movement on her face. Her eyes rolled back as she closed them, not able to keep them open as he slowly entered her more and more. He wanted to see her reaction, her emotions, but barely he was able himself not to close his eyes too. She was magnificent. Tony's cock burried inside her heaven. They stayed still for a moment trying to adjust to the perfect connection they made.

„Tony, move. Please." She opened her eyes to see him. They both wanted to see each other reaction as he slowly thrust out. They eyes connected as he thrusted in and out again. Quietly moaning, their eyes telling all the words instead of their mouths. They loved each other. That's it. He moved faster and faster, her ancles locked above his ass as he pounded into her with force and love. Her nails marking his back as she was moaning loudly her teeth occasionally bitting him in his neck and shlouder. She didn't want to be so loud, but his perfect cock deep inside her didnt gave her a choice. After all, she was a screamer. Suddenly, the house was not as quiet as he thougth it was before. The bed under them was making weird sound, their skin slapping together and her beautiful loud moans with his sharp breathing and moaning her name quietly maybe too often filled the air. He felt her tightening around him, her orgasm buiding slowly as her moans grew louder and louder. She was screaming in ecstacy and he was giving her all the pleasure. He pounded into her harder, faster. He wanted to give her everything he could. The whole world, the Sun from the sky if she wanted it. But right in that moment he could gave her the most amazing orgasm and damn he would rather die if he didn't gave it to her. Her legs tighten arround his torso, her walls squeezing his cock, her nails scratching him more and her lips finding his as she came hard.

Still burried deep inside her, he waited for her world to stop spinning. He found his heaven, his perfect other half. She was everything he ever needed. For a second he was sure that he needed her more than oxygen. He would not be able to describe how he felt about her. Noone ever created a single word for that.

She catched her breath again, looking at him. She didn't find big amount of lust in his eyes. She saw the love. She knew now, that if she let him go after this she would broke him. But she could never promise him herself. Her heart will forever be his, but her mind kept going to the darkest of paths. One day she would broke him more than now. And her body in this moment was everything she could gave him.

She used her power to flip them over so she could be on top. „Remeber this, Tony. Remember every moment." she whispered to him. At first he didn't totally get what she meant. But from the way her fingers caressed his forehead, cheek and lips he realized that this is all what she will ever give him.

And there he was, naked in the bed under the love of his life making love to her, but he felt broken. She was in his arms for now and he couldn't afford to think about future. He would not be able to handle it. All hope he had before was gone. But we are talking about Anthony DiNozzo, the guy who always stays positive. Spark of hope was still there and he still had time to change her mind. Because after all, he didn't know if he would be able to breathe without her next to him.

She saw all his thougths in his eyes. His eyes never lied. She knew that he knew. And maybe she felt the pain rigth where her heart is. She bent down to kiss him. To assure him that she was still present. Slowly, she started to rock her hips against his. He helped her, his cock immidiatelly hitting the right spots and she arched her back. He couldnt help but smile. His perfect warrior, woman stronger that anyone was fucking herself with him inside of her. Her head falling back as she closed her eyes and enjoyed the act. Her wild hear on her shoulders slightly covering her breasts. He thrust up to meet her hips a few times. If he didn't see what effect he had on her, he probably wouldnt believe it. She started to mutter words in hebrew which he didn't understand, but still it was beautiful. She was beautiful. He was very, very hard and he needed his release. He sat up, with Ziva in his lap still rocking herself. They were face to face again. He reached her hips and slowed her down. He wanted to make love to her. She had fucked herself enough. She looked at him suprised but very quickly, she got her answer. His hands surrounded her back, passionatelly stroking her olive skin. He rocked into her hard once. Then second time and again set slow pace. His mouth sucked on her neck and collarbone. Her hand playing with his hair. The slowly rocking was amazing. The position was very intimate. His mouth found her nipples. He sucked them both hard, then kissed them. He licked his way up to her mouth and kissed her slowly. Their tongues caressing each other like they had a life of their own.

He knew he couldnt last like this forever. He pushed her down on her back and fastened the pace. their bodies both trying the reach the climax.

"I will," kiss, "always," thrust, "remember," kiss, "this," thrust. They locked eyes. This was too much for both of them. Too many emotions. He was figthing it. He was fighting for her. He couldn't help it, but the tears building up in his eyes started to find its way out. They love each other so why the hell is it so complicated?! She is the best thing that has ever happend to him so why can't he have her forever?! Tears were streming down his face as he was rocking into her. She couldn't be looking at him. She was causing his pain. She wanted to turn her head away but he stopped her with his hand. His eyes full of tears were looking rigth into hers as he kept making love to her. He wanted her so much. How is he supposed to live without her?

He pinned her hands above her head as he used all his remained energy to reach the top. This was it. The only time he gets to come inside of her. The only time he gets to be so close to her, sharing his body with her. His heart is breaking into million peaces because he know he will have to leave her behind. Move on. So he pounds harder and harder. Holding her hands still, his tears falling down on her skin he comes with her. World stands still. No sounds. No movements. Only somewhere between them their hearts continues to beat. And something else. In that moment they created a life. Sure they didn't know it back then. One lovemaking was enough for them to make a product of their love. An evidence of their love. If he had knew that back then everything would have been different. He would not end up crying right there still inside of her with his head on her chest. He would not broke right after they were intimate. Right after they gave each other everything.

Her gentle hands were touching his head as his teras were falling down on her breats. She was trying to sooth him, tell him its gonna be alright but his tears hadn't stopped. And it became too much for her too and her tears started to leave her eyes. He was holding her for his own sake. They were breaking each other. Nothing and noone else could ever fix them. They were meant to be together, but nothing is always as we want it.

As tears stopped, he slipped out of her and layed next to her. As close to each other as possible, they fell asleep. The next day he left her. Hardest 180 of his life. But he didn't leave her alone. If he had known that...