The sun was burning hot above the Ember Island. Katara was sitting in the cool shadow of the porch watching Aang and Zuko train their firebending once again. They had been doing it a lot lately. Sokka and Suki were who knows where doing who knows what and Toph had gone wandering around the island.
Katara leaned backwards and supported herself with her hands. She couldn't understand how Aang and Zuko could stand the heat – it was hot enough as it was, but they were also shooting huge bursts of fire within inches of their bodies. They had taken off their shirts, which she supposed made the heat more bearable. Although she guessed is was harder for Aang than for Zuko, who was, after all, in his element. Aang was only training – though he was already on a very high level – and fire had been the last thing he had wanted to master. His expression was, however, eager and happily determined as he moved next to his trainer in exact the same way he did. Zuko was as stubborn and stern-looking as ever.
Katara sucked her teeth. She had been watching the two train whenever she could since the day the prince had joined them. She hadn't trusted Zuko and had wanted to make sure that if the firebender decided to abandon his so-called "new self", there would be somebody to defend Aang. The prince hadn't hurt him, and even Katara had had to admit that he truly seemed to have changed. It hadn't been easy for her, and something still made her doubt him even after all the good he had done for them – and for her.
In the first days of Zuko's presence Katara had been jumpy and edgy. Whenever she had woken from her sleep and seen Zuko sleeping or standing nearby, her first reaction had been to whisk out some water and slice him into bits. In less than a second she had remembered that supposedly he wasn't their enemy anymore, but after so long of watching him hurl fire at them in rage it wasn't easy to forget the mental image.
Katara watched as the firebender and his smiling pupil jumped and turned and ducked and kicked with fire swirling all around them. She didn't seriously believe that Zuko would harm Aang, not anymore. She wasn't even alert in that sense, and found herself merely watching without paying extra attention to Zuko's every move and threatening glance. It had been exhausting to pay attention to it, anyway, since whenever Zuko and Aang were sparring, the prince had the same determined and angry expression on his face. It had kept Katara on her toes the whole time, which had been tiring both physically and mentally. She wasn't watching them anymore because she was afraid – she was watching because she couldn't help herself.
Aang of course enjoyed her being there while he was training. She noticed him trying to be at his best every time she was watching. He tried to look stronger and prouder, more determined, more muscular, more mature. He aimed for perfection because he didn't want her to see him fail – not that she hadn't seen him fail before. But for Aang, it was different this time. It was different to fail in a battle with deadly foes and to fail in something he was trying to master.
However strong and cool and mature Aang tried to look like, his eyes shot to Katara every now and then. He glanced at her and flashed a wide smile at her, and tried to make an impressive move right afterwards, just to show how good he was. He was indeed good, but unfortunately all the glancing and smiling and showing off made him a tiny bit careless. Which meant that he wasn't focusing. Which meant that Zuko had to shoot fireballs right past his ear and tell him to focus every time he was losing the grip. Aang thought that the only reason Zuko didn't tell Katara to get the hell off and let them train in peace was that he didn't want her to be mad at him again.
And Aang was secretly glad. He didn't mind being distracted by Katara. He certainly didn't mind her watching him being so powerful and cool – fire blazing around in total control of the bender was undeniably cool, in a sense, and Katara had seen him master all other elements already. How crushing it would have been for him to know that it wasn't, in fact, he that she was watching.
If someone had asked her, she would have denied it instantly. With a heavy blush, probably. She didn't even want to admit it to herself but the truth was that slowly, bit by bit, as her suspicion about Zuko had begun to evaporate, she noticed to be following his movements again. Just like before, when she was expecting him to betray them again and attack Aang, but his time... this time she just watched him because it made her heart race in a way she had never felt it racing before. When she had first realized what she was doing she had turned her eyes away and indeed blushed. After that she had tried to keep her eyes fixed on Aang, but it was difficult since the two were constantly moving and occasionally Zuko blocked her view altogether – and her eyes sailed right past Aang and settled on him instead.
Katara had tried to figure out what was going on. She had tried to reason that it was nothing – but she was afraid to look too deep into the matter because she was afraid of what might be revealed and thus she tried not to think too much. And she came up with defenses: what's wrong with looking at someone, anyway? I'm looking at Aang and Toph and Sokka and Suki when they're training, too, what's the big deal? It's OK to look, I might get better at my fighting if I learned new moves just by watching others train. And she settled to that even though deep down she knew she was kidding herself, and not too efficiently, even.
She had learned not to think, really, when she watched the prince and the Avatar train. She never seriously considered the option that she might actually not watch, nothing forced her to, and going away and doing something else would have solved quite a few of her problems. Her only reason not to leave was Aang. He would surely mind if she wasn't there. Or so she wanted to believe.
Aang. Katara watched him breathe some fire and glance at her again with a spark in his eye and she swallowed and felt something sting her chest. Guilt? Why? For what? She convinced herself that she wasn't doing anything weird or wrong, she was just watching two of her friends train. And that's that. But that's not exactly how Aang saw it and it really wasn't what Katara's conscience thought.
The thing was that Zuko was so different. Katara had been traveling with Sokka and Aang for a long time and apart from a few exceptions, they were the only men around her. Without exceptions, they were the only men constantly around her. And they weren't even men, that's the point, they were boys. She loved them both but until now, she hadn't had anyone to watch like she was watching the firebender. Sokka was her brother and ogling at him that way never ever crossed her mind. And Aang wasn't exactly built up to be ogled at. Not yet, at any rate. He was still so young-looking, which wasn't too surprising considering he was still very young. And Katara was used to them and fond of them, to Sokka's whining and his sense of humor, to Aang's positive attitude and excitement.
And then came Zuko. The Changed Zuko. The brooding, tall, gloomy, dark, firebending Zuko. Of course Katara had seen him before, more times than she had wanted to, but not like this. Not so uncertain, so willing to please, so nice. And not without a shirt on.
Katara sighed and watched how the flames danced around the two benders. Did they have to train half naked so often? Not that it offended her, but she found it harder not to ogle when their shirts were somewhere else but on them. On him, that is. Zuko was in great shape, she had to admit. He was probably as muscular as Sokka and Aang combined, and he was taller than them, and didn't smile even nearly as often. And all that combined made him older and more manly in Katara's eyes, even though he was still a teen.
And what really made an impression on her was the passion the prince poured into his bending. She knew that passion well, because she herself felt passionately about water. It was her element and it made her strong, it gave her a great power and it could heal her. Bending water was not only fun, it was enthralling. She could get lost in it for hours and never get tired of it. And yet she felt that her passion for water was less intense than Zuko's passion for fire. Maybe it was merely because firebenders tended to be more intense, more fierce, quicker to ignite – that's what her experience told her, anyway. However it was, Zuko seemed to cast every little bit of himself into his bending. His eyes practically gleamed with every flame as if they were shooting fire as well. His every muscle concentrated on what he was doing and he had eyes for nothing but his opponent or his own attack.
Katara couldn't recall Aang being so passionate even with airbending. He always seemed to take such things relatively lightly and enjoy them in the process. Maybe it was just because bending seemed to be so easy to him. Effortless. He seemed to be having fun when he was airbending and flying, it didn't look like he was deeply passionate about it. Do I look like it, then? Katara wondered. I feel it, I think, but do I look like it? Zuko looked like it and he looked like he felt it, too. And it was something Katara couldn't help admiring.
And instantly she mentally kicked herself when she realized what she had just been thinking. Why did she have to compare him to Aang, just like he was... no. I'm comparing them because they are right there together, training. That's right.
At that moment Toph returned with her feet considerably dirtier than when she had left. She sat next to Katara and wriggled her toes a bit.
"Had fun?" Katara asked and eyed her dusty outfit.
"Of course", Toph replied. "This island has lots of nice earth to bend. Have you really been sitting here supervising Twinkletoes' lesson all the time? 'Cos that sounds too boring to even think about."
"I'm not supervising", Katara snorted. "I'm just watching. They're dealing with fire there, and accidents happen. I'm here so that if something happens, I can help."
"Uh-huh", Toph said in a tone that told Katara that she didn't believe her. It never stopped annoying her that Toph was a high-class lie detector. However, neither of them continued on the subject and soon Sokka and Suki came back, holding hands and being ridiculously lovey-dovey. When Aang saw that all his friends were back, he became slightly less interested in training and began joking with Sokka in the middle of his bending. Zuko soon noticed that the game was lost and with a roll of his eyes and a sigh he said it was time to stop. They bowed at each other and Aang rushed beaming to the others. Zuko glanced at the sun and raised his eyebrow. It was starting to set anyway, and the best time to firebend was during the day. He grabbed a towel and walked slowly to the others.
"I think I'm finally getting the hang of this thing", Aang explained enthusiastically to the others. "The key is to feel the fire inside you and..."
"... focus", Zuko finished with a slight glare as a few sparks erupted from Aang's fingertips towards Sokka.
"You did great", Katara said and smiled to Aang, wishing that Zuko would remember that he owned a shirt.
"Thanks, Katara", Aang beamed warmly. "But I've got a lot to learn before I'm ready to go see Ozai..."
"Tell me about it!" Toph snorted. "Tomorrow is my turn to teach you, Twinkletoes. Mr Hothead here has been keeping you all to himself for too many days in a row. You're no master of earthbending, you know!"
"Okay", Aang sighed and Zuko shrugged, though he felt that learning firebending was slightly more crucial at this point, since Aang had been learning earthbending for much longer. Aang felt the same, and since earthbending was still not his favourite of the four, he would have rather played with fire a bit more.
"Could you two get dressed, you'll catch a cold", Katara blurted out all of a sudden. They all looked at her and blinked.
"Katara", Sokka said, "we're on a tropical island. It's not like there's a giant blizzard coming over to freeze us all to death. It's freaking hot!"
"Well... the sun is setting and it might rain, you never know", she replied hurriedly and got up. She brushed her dress a bit and said she'd go make some dinner. Aang exchanged a look with Sokka and they both shrugged.
"You'd think she could sense when it's about to rain", Toph muttered.