A/N: Kind of crack!fic, but I am intrigued by this non-pair. Enjoy-
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The Bright Side of Suffering
- Scary Kids Scaring Kids
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Teddy painfully nudges a container or red Jell-o around her plastic tray, waiting, watching the eyes that are scouting her from every single angle of the cafeteria. She's positive that no number of people have ever paid this much attention to even the smallest flicks of her fingers as they test the rubbery, jiggly surface of the alleged dessert.
It's not fair. She shouldn't be the one in the open, witnesses bearing down on her otherwise jovial mood. This should be Owen, for all the turmoil he's caused, for all of the heartache that Teddy's not quite convinced she will ever be able to forget.
But then, just like every other week, the posse of attendings slowly trickle in- Callie and Arizona's arms linked, Derek scuffing his feet (nose to a stack of thick papers), and the new redhead bickering with Mark (which she now calls him, because they are way past niceties). And finally she can feel Owen bump hips with her as he slides into the chair next to her, immediately swapping out her Jell-o for his chocolate chip cookie.
And when he presses a light kiss to her cheek, the interns wielding their plastic knives disappear, and the gossiping nurses wither into nothing more than background noise as more pressing matters (like how anyone could not possibly notice that Mark and the new girl are hooking up- to Red's dismay, and about how if Derek doesn't find a way to boost their ratings within a month they will be looking at a serious budget cut- to which everyone tells him to shut up and stop whining, and about how Callie and Arizona can't decide how they want to go about expanding their family.)
Everything is urgent now.
The world has been turned on its head, but for Teddy, it's finally slowing its spin.
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It took three months for them to even take the dive of being seen together in public. She told him it was okay to choose, and he did, but then he changed his mind.
She hadn't banked on that.
And so she watched, wounded as he, as he attempted to recover from his scars- both mental and physical.
One night he told her. Told her how he wished he was dead, how he wasn't supposed to be the lone survivor, and about how the gunshot was supposed to be righting that eternal wrong.
It wasn't the best lead-in to their first (second) kiss, but it held its own, and then they drank, and reminisced and when he was asleep she ran the tips of her fingers through the hair she had always dared to touch and whispered that she wished she could have been with him.
Many more secrets followed, often enraging Owen (he was once a great sharer, but that was another lifetime), and he wanted to know how long she'd been holding out on him- how long she'd been hiding her love behind dust storms and masks of friendship. Teddy couldn't answer, still can't, because she doesn't know when it shifted, or if it began as it was, as it is now.
But the next night, he jumped onto the stool next to her at the local watering hole she almost always avoided, ordered a beer, and was honest with himself for the first time in a long time- citing that if they were doing this, he needed help, because to wake up with his hands around Teddy's throat, that wasn't an event Owen thought he'd ever be able to live down (she wouldn't be cavalier, she wouldn't dismiss the situation until it was resolved).
And for the first time since arriving in Seattle, Teddy felt herself smiling out of feeling more than obligation, fastening their hands together under the counter, vowing to never let go.
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By the time news hit Seattle Grace, Teddy and Owen had surpassed the six month point, and were experts at sneaking in and out of on-call rooms, Dr. Wyatt's office, and making it look like they were avoiding one another, when in fact, their attention was undivided.
She's narrowed it down to Alex Karev, or Lexie Grey (who both had an unfortunate run-in with them in compromising positions, more than once). But from her dealings with Karev, he doesn't seem the type to gossip, and Lexie points to Meredith, Meredith to Cristina, and well the rest is self-explanatory, which is why Owen is cornered at the end of the hall by a furious resident who is flailing wildly.
"I wouldn't worry about her, she's more bark than bite," Addison enlightens, dropping her chart into its slot.
Teddy chooses to walk away, to not partake, because she's already spent too much energy defending herself from Cristina Yang.
Owen doesn't come to her apartment that night, she can't say she's surprised. She can't say she's not worried either.
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It's the flowers that cause their first major fight. White, yellow, and drowning in greenery.
Flowers are for when something bad has occured, which Teddy demands to know, causing an overreaction, and accusation, and a subsequent door slamming in her face.
They don't talk for three days, the cafeteria sees neither hide nor hair of the "couple" (it's apparently still under advisement), and it takes Mark telling Owen to grow up (as relayed by Addison who no doubt put him up to it), for the whole thing to end in a hush of apologies and a fury of missed kisses.
That weekend, Callie, Addison, and Arizona take her out for a spa day. It's a little uncomfortable, being lumped in with them, but after a few good glasses of champagne, a confession that she hasn't had her toenails painted in ten years, and Callie mocking Addison's failed life in California, she feels a little more at home.
When they shimmy back in against the leather of the black limo shuttling them around, Teddy feels the first glimpse of belonging.
But when they arrive home to find Mark and Addison's apartment in complete disarray, Mark, Owen, Karev and Derek drunk and screaming at the football game on replay- when Arizona grins and points at the door and they all rush back out to save themselves from the mess and curses of bad calls, it's the first time she wouldn't rather be one of the guys.
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"He's got the "I'm going to propose or my head will pop off" jitters," Addison points out seven months later, a tiny three month old baby squirming against her hold (Rylen, or something ridiculous like it that Teddy still isn't sure how to pronounce properly).
"I think that would be New Daddy Fever," Teddy corrects, staring at Mark, burp cloths over both shoulders, a pacifier between his teeth, feverishly searching for something Addison has already said she doesn't need anymore for their adopted daughter.
"I wasn't talking about Mark," Addison replies cryptically and sashays out of the room with more grace than any new mother that Teddy has ever met.
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Callie and Arizona have her trapped, which, as she's learned is how they like to operate.
"Has he asked yet?" Arizona asks with a grin larger than her face.
"He's going to ask," Callie assures both of them.
"I- have a surgery," Teddy replies, darting for the wrong floor as soon as the doors spring open.
Everyone is so positive that it's happening that they all forget to mention that they may or may not be in on it, and Teddy is completely blindsided by the cafeteria proposal later in the week.
He says it's how they got their start, slips the ring onto her finger (without asking), and leaves everyone to speculate over what he's talking about.
They met in a cafeteria, years ago, that's where he first saw her. Teddy seals her lips and rubs the course cut on her hand, more giddy than she ever saw herself being over any man. Mark and Derek vie for best man immediately, Derek pointing out that at least he has never and will never sleep with his wife, Mark pointing out that he isn't the one who wanted to have him fired when he started.
In the end, no one wins.
It's just them at the alter, a ragtag bunch of lonely family, friends, surgeons, and fellow service buddies looking on as two people recite normal vows, push plain bands over each other's knuckles, and give the audience a vanilla kiss. Callie cries, Addison slaps Marks shoulder over a directive rude comment, and Derek sits patiently with his own (illegal) wife.
Teddy catches a glimpse of Cristina Yang at the reception, she's heard the resident has plans to leave as soon as her residency is up, but it's the nod and unwanted smile that leaves her stunned. Owen brings her back to reality rudely, however, by shoving a mound of white cake with raspberry filling all over her face, and suddenly she's immersed in the land she never saw happening years ago.
No one will remember, but it suits them, Teddy decides as she sways in her new husbands arms, a highly overpaid DJ forcing the melody in the background.
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Two years pass, more fights are endured, Owen even threatens to sleep in a hotel one night but the end up the same. Therapy on Thursdays, lunch Monday, Wednesday, Friday. He talks about it less now, all of it, and she's trying to take it as a good sign.
And slowly the looks in the cafeteria disappear. No one knows the whole story anymore, and the new people are too afraid to ask, especially since she hangs around with the notoriously bitchy She-Sloan.
But somehow she's always the first one to the table, and every now and again, she swears she can feel the heat of an intern's eyes on the back of her neck, or a purposefully angry glare from a nurse she doesn't even recognize. Then a cookie will smack onto her tray, or even once fly across people's heads into her lap, and she'll smell him, feel his lips against her cheek, and it doesn't matter- even if it is no longer accurate.
Today it's about a laundry hamper Mark can never seem to find (about how he can never successfully dress children, do the dishes, complete homework and so on), the late nights Derek has been pulling, Callie's hormones, and the annoying way Addison rolls her eyes. Sometimes Teddy plays along, sometimes she's part of the group, but most of the time she just watches in awe of what's become.
When the world is frantic, they're calm. When everyone is dizzy, they're clear.
The spinning is nothing more than a careless swing tangled in the chaos of marriage and family, and she's happy to be a part of it.
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