Disclaimer: I own nothing, this is pretty obvious. But just so we're clear.

Leaving Today.

Chapter 1.

Prologue.

From my spot in the bushes.

A dash of silver, a blur of red. Intermingling with dark, endless tresses of brown. Rough, calloused hands reached out for cold, softer ones. Barely brushing against each other, a rosy tinting of a pair of cheeks, and promises from long ago. Fingers lacing together in gentle, silent understanding. It was something that could never be sabotaged. Two lovers, embracing under the dull, silver, night sky. The stars hung only for them, the wishes they'd make upon those stars would stretch on until the end of time.

Even as my vision became blurry from stinging wet tears, I could see the passion in their gaze. A passion that had died too quickly, and had abruptly blazed back to life. As if someone had just lit a fire into their souls, sending them into perfect bliss. Enveloped in the warmth of their former love, they stood. They had no words to form because this was such a rare opportunity. Such a perfect getaway from the outside world. Had time stopped for them?

For one night they would stand, and simply stare, they would simply embrace. Reminiscing on late midnight strolls hand in hand. Remembering times of grief, but letting their joyous reunion overlap such cruel memories. A melancholy smile would touch her lips, so utterly sorrowful that it would tug at his heart strings. He would have no choice but to capture her further into his willing, loving arms. He would trap her there, just to remind her of what they had once shared. He would rest his cheek upon the crown of her head and she would allow him to carry her to all of the places she had always dreamed to go.

For just one night, she would linger there. For all of her chances for the real thing had died long ago. But he would not remind her of that, he would just hold her and caress every single space of her hardened heart. And she would let out a choked noise. But the moisture would never come from her smooth, lovely eyes. She was incapable of such things, but if she so desired he would cry for her, hard and agonizing. Just like the screaming that shook his very core for this woman.

Clawed hands would circle the small of her back, and he would fight back the urge to inhale her scent. The scent that she carried was probably foul, it would never be up to par like it once had been. But he would pay it no mind. He would let his nose wrinkle, but the wrinkling of his soul at her departure would be much stronger. His world would crumble in that instant, but he would not worry about it until morning touched the horizon. For now, he would just have her.

He would let his long, timid fingers tangle into her silky, pen straight hair. He would admire its silky texture and let the feel of it burn into his mind, so he could remember forever. He would never allow himself to forget such a beautiful treasure. His gem. His.

From my spot in the bushes.

I could see her fingers dancing along his neck and trail their way up his strong jaw. He would seize his movements and let her have her way with him. Her delicate hand grasped onto his thick silver mane, knotting it with her fist. She tugged down on the silvery strands. He would take this as proper initiative. He let his head slowly dip down so that his forehead was lightly touching hers.

My own hands trembled at the action. When was it ever enough for me? Why would my eyes never fail me, why wouldn't it blind me to this damnable truth? I felt my bottom lip quiver in misery. My breath was shaky and I could see it disappear into the chilly, autumn air. I was invisible. They could never see me because they were too entranced, too enchanted by one another to think about anything else. When had I gotten to this point? Sneaking around to spy on a love so sacred? A love that would never be meant for me. The one that I had longed for.

The one that I hand longed for, held that cold, hard body. The one that I longed for held special eyes of love for only her. Those strong lovely lips of his only touched mine in my wildest dreams, only dared to speak those three little words in my subconscious. Because I was never destined to hear them in the waking world. He would only whisper those words into her ears, far away from civilization where they could just be one together. Perhaps in the darkest depths of hell they would mingle together in a dark union.

And I would still be here. For every kiss they shared, would be another tear that I would shed. Another scar on my heart, and another contusion to my soul.

So why hadn't I turned away? When his forehead touched hers, and how he let his eyes fall closed. Why hadn't I looked away when an angelic, beautiful smile surfaced from behind dead, chocolate orbs? As he kissed her eye lids I felt my body shiver. Such a beautifully, affectionate gesture. One that was so out of character for him. He'd rather die than to ever be so fond of me.

So why were my eyes not ripping away from this vile scene? The disgustingly, haunting vision of true love. I could feel the stress of the situation hitting me dead on. But I never moved.

From my spot in the bushes.

As his lips crashed into hers so did the weight of the world. It crashed onto my shoulders. Their lips moved at an unnatural rhythm, hungry, desperate. It was like watching a movie that you couldn't bring yourself to look away from. The hand that should have been covering my eyes fell limply to my side, defeated. Is this what it was like to have your heart ripped from your very chest? To feel your lungs shrivel behind a cracked rib cage? To have no air to breathe again?

His grip had tightened on her priestess garbs, assuring there would be no escape from the sweet torture. He let kisses trail down her chin to the nape of her neck and I felt my stomach churn at the same pace. She made no noise, could not dare to move. She just rested her hand atop his head, urging his ministrations, awkwardly. He stopped his vicious assault and pulled her at arms length taking a long look at her. Her eyes traveled away from him onto the forest floor. She was embarrassed.

And I loathed her with every fiber of my being. Hated her so much I could feel the bile on my lips. The sour taste in my mouth thickened with raw, unadulterated, envy. My throat went paper dry, as I watched my love place a soft kiss on her forehead. His baritone voice echoed off of the trees and into the night to my unwilling ears.

"Kikyou. . .I've missed you."

That had been enough. My eyes snapped away from the scene. Standing up on wobbly legs, I tip toed out of the bushes away from the terrible sight. I took off like a bat out of hell. Sweeping around the trees of the thick forest I felt my heart thump silently in my chest. The aching numbness would probably never subside. Every time I would recall the events of this night, I knew my insides would be shredded all over again. Had it been worth it to watch them? I wanted to say yes, so I could see with my own eyes. To see the truth; that he would never be mine.

This just proved my theories. I had known all along, but to witness it is an entirely different pain. How long would I suffer with this? Be the silly girl he ran back to simply because he had obligations to an old duty? To be the dumb, thick headed girl that insisted to stay at his side even though I knew that I was never wanted to begin with. Hadn't he told me to go back to my own time years ago? I hadn't listened, because I was so hopelessly loyal to him. So in love with this troubled, heavyhearted, arrogant boy. I wanted to repair him, wanted my love for him to glisten out of every pore of my body, just to prove it. Wanted to hold him until he understood how much my bleeding heart yearned for just a kind word or brush of his shoulder against mine.

I felt my legs carry my through the dark fields. The grass cut deep into my skin as it swayed into my sprinting form. I could only pay attention to the heavy ache in my chest, and the sharp inability to breathe properly.

From my spot in bushes.

I had witnessed true longing. I had seen what it was like to be broken. The will, the fire, the passion that I always held. I knew tonight it had been stomped down, reduced to the nothingness. Like the nothingness of my existence to that boy. To that boy I was just another annoyance, another hassle, a shard detector. Just a stepping stone to use as he wished so he could achieve his ultimate goal. To avenge his former love. The jewel really meant nothing to him anymore. It was just her, and the nasty way they had been betrayed.

I could not blame him for wanting to seek action. But I cursed his blindness to me. He always talked so bluntly and hurtful to me. As if it were just second nature. A few stinging words here, some curses and a few 'sits.' That's as far as he would allow me to go. The occasional blush, the rare moment when our fingers locked together. His tender side that he'd only allow to surface when his defenses were down is what made me cling to him like a magnet. It was so alluring. I always tried my best to crack the ice, to thaw it so he could be free. But in the end his icy heart had finally won the battle.

I would not try any longer.

I lost.

I would no longer be the obedient, blushing bitch, hanging on his every word, his every breath. He was the half demon dog, but I was the loyal old mutt refusing to leave his side because of my stubborn devotion. The intensity that I felt for this boy was dragging me too far down. And as I'm being dragged down, I knew I'd take the others with me. It would just hurt them.

The sympathetic, pitiful looks they would give me. It twisted the knife deeper into my wounds. I didn't bother to hold my tears any longer. I just felt them pour from behind pained lids, making my cheeks sticky and damp. In the back of my mind I wondered how long it would take to stop crying. I knew my heart and soul would always cry for this night. The night when I finally gave up on him.

It had never been his complete fault. It was mostly mine for being a masochist and sticking around where I knew I didn't belong. I could only wonder the purpose of the well opening for me. Was my only purpose to revive InuYasha? What if I had stayed longer than fate had planned? Was this some kind of sadistic form of karma?

My feet never gave out. Perhaps I had already died on my feet minutes ago?

From my spot in the bushes.

My legs had just refused to stiffen, refused to let me see the horrors that only this era could provide for me now. To be rid of this boy that had killed me as I stood. To be away from that sickening undead priestess that had crushed my dreams time and time again. They would not refuse me this little act of selfishness.

I had finally found my way back to camp. I glided into the dim firelight. My vision took in the sleeping forms of my true friends. I admired them there, in the light of the flames, for it was their only escape from the pressures of this era. To be so vulnerable in their sleep, my heart clenched.

Perhaps I'd never see their faces again. That of a monk that had served more as my mentor and older brother, a demon slayer with a soul so divine I couldn't help but call her the very best friend I had ever had. My eyes stopped landing on their destination when they saw him. My fox demon child. The purest of them all, even with his scheming mind. How would the fox demon react when he found me gone the next morning? I shuddered, feeling guilty already. But it had to be done, for my sake, for their sake. And for InuYasha's sake. I couldn't continue to stray in a place that held no future for me.

It was bound to happen sooner or later. Whether forced or willingly.

I crept over to the fox child, stroking his dark rusty colored locks with my shaking hand. A silent snore was my only response. I brushed my lips over his forehead. "I'll never forget you, Shippou." I admitted to his sleeping form. As if he were having the sweetest dream, his lips upturned into a haunting smile. One that would be burned into my being until my dying day.

I took a reluctant step backward and whirled around to retrieve my hideous, yellow backpack. I left some snacks and some ramen out into the open. I had to leave before InuYasha came back with that peaceful, completed smile on his face. I couldn't bare to witness his completion after speaking to the undead woman. I would vomit, spewing the remains of my heart from my throat.

It was almost day break. I felt my damp bangs plaster to my forehead as I stared down at the ground. Was this really the right decision? To leave without saying goodbye? Or would goodbye just further complicate things? I couldn't imagine that this situation could get any more complicated. Would I be able to leave if I saw those wide, sad green eyes peering at me? Questioning me silently? Shippou. . .

I wouldn't be able to leave. But when an image of InuYasha trailing soft kisses down Kikyou's neck crossed my mind; I took a deep breath, and let my jaw set in determination. I'd leave today. That was that. I flung the bag over my shoulder and ran as fast as I could back to the direction of the well.

I would never look back. . .

From my spot in the bushes.

Something died in me that could never revive again.

I could never be whole.

Because they revealed that I could never have him.

-

I felt worn down. My limbs refused to comply but I had still managed to make it. To The Bone Eater's Well. The well that connected me to InuYasha. To this mythical world where not all fairy tales came true. I first approached this well a confused, modern girl.

I'm leaving as a confused, broken girl. Had time really done so much? I was always told that there was only one thing that could be promised in life. And that was death. We're promised nothing more. But I'd have to disagree. Time would always be here. Could it ever run out? Even when we die time will still move on.

I felt like my time was dwindling. My heart was in shambles. But I knew time wouldn't stop for me. It wouldn't stop long enough for me to repair myself, it would keep moving forward. So agonizing, so slowly. It was cruel. Time had allowed me to discover this era full of broken possibilities. Was I really so delusional? I was guaranteed time, but not here. Not with these people. And not with the one I wanted.

I rested my palm against the cool, stone surface of the dry well. So many things played back into my mind. Sad moments, happy moments, terrifying moments. But out of all of them, this would be something I would always remember. The one thing that I'd wish to forget; I would live with forever. Pure, untamed loss. The loss of my naïve nature, the loss of everything I was brought up to be.

The loss of my very self.

I braced myself as I made a move to throw myself into the portal. One last time. All it would take was one more time to be done with this world, to be done with images of his lips hovering above hers. One last time to climb up the ladder to my familiar home and cry myself to sleep. To fall deeper into this lovesick coma that I couldn't possibly wake up from.

I closed my eyes, taking one long breath. It would be now. Or it would be never. I jumped in.

And had not landed. My eyes shot open in alarm. I felt a rough hand grasping at the back of my collar. Oh god. I tried not to weep in misery. "Wench! What the hell do you think you're doing now?" Came an angry snarl from above me.

That voice was the reason for my early death. I felt myself being pulled up and out of the well effortlessly. I was placed onto the forest floor, back to where I had started. I could only guess how lifeless my eyes were. "Do you know how long I've been following your ass?"

I sighed and turned to face the disgruntled boy. "InuYasha." I said weakly. "What do you want?"

He blinked, the anger quickly disappearing from his face. "What do I want?" He mocked using a very sorry impression of my voice. Normally I would have glared. I did nothing but look down at the swooning blades of endless green grass. It was silent then. I could feel his eyes on me, could hear his breath catch in his throat. I could only hear the breeze, and the dull thump of my heart through my ears.

"Kagome. Why did you run all the way here?" His voice was soft now, foreign from its usually gruff tone. "By yourself? You could have asked me to take you home."

"No I couldn't have." I croaked pathetically. "You weren't there."

I saw him gulp and his eyes widened. "Kagome. . ." He trailed off. His ears drooped probably from guilt. I winced. It was all my fault he had to feel guilty for loving her. How awful was I? He knew that I had been watching now.

"It's okay." I told him, and I truly meant it this time. "You don't have to feel bad about it." I approached him now and he made no move to cut me off. He just let his shocking gold orbs blaze into my own. I tried to pour out my heart to him with one look, tried to tell him all of the things that I had on my mind. He was also trying to tell me something. I couldn't quite make out the message, It was probably something I didn't want to figure out. I grimaced inwardly. "You can do it more freely now. Because I. . ." I swallowed back the lump that was itching in my throat.

He continued to stare at me, eyes narrowed brows knitted together. His silver strands flew with the wind, dancing in perfect harmony. "Why are you saying this?" He finally asked, his voice came out strained.

"Because I'm leaving today."

"When do you want me to come back for you?" His ear twitched, and I wondered if Kikyou ever got to feel the velvety soft appendages between her fingers. It would be a special gift if she had. I finally reached him and I let my arms fall around his waist. Without questioning the action he quickly wrapped himself around me, holding me to his chest. How could he hold me this way when he had just been holding Kikyou hours ago? I refused to let the tears spill in front of him.

Boldly I let my hands travel up his strong abs, to his chest. I rested them there and he held me, refusing to meet my eyes. I knew this was probably very strained for him. So I acted quickly. I fingered the rosary that hung limply around his neck. I toyed with them, they clanked together almost inaudibly. "Kagome?" I could feel the rapid rise and fall of his chest pick up in speed. His heart hammered out of control against his skin and I wondered why.

I swept his thick, silver hair over his shoulder, letting myself run my hands through it. He shivered under my touch. I knew he was disgusted. I lifted the rosary from his head and away from his hair so it wouldn't snag. The action was so quick that not even his half demon speed could have saw it coming. "W-what?" He stammered not really making sense. I let the beads fall onto the grass, carelessly forgotten. There was a surprising, bruised look in his eyes. His ears fell again. He let his face drop to the fallen beads. "Why would you do that?" He shouted now, anger evident in his handsome face.

"InuYasha. You don't have to worry about coming to get me anymore." I whispered, releasing him. I took a shaky step back and he stepped forward. We continued this until the back of my knees hit the rim of the well. He was in my face now looking at me as if my eyes could answer his inner questions and conflicts.

"And why the fuck not?" He demanded. "Don't tell me you have more of those stupid test things to take! God damn it! We have to look for more shards! You can't just keep waltzing off on your merry way whenever you please!"

My hand fell to the bottle containing the jewel shards. I had completely forgotten about them. I took them off and offered them to him. "Take them. I don't have any use for them anymore."

"What the fuck?" He snarled out, confused. He took them and shoved them into his robes. "I don't get what you're doing Kagome. But I don't fucking like it."

"InuYasha. I'm not coming back anymore. I'm going to my world and I'm not ever coming back." I said in a haste. My mouth had moved so quickly I couldn't even process my own words. He was silent now, so incredibly silent. His eyes still bore into mine, pissed beyond all doubt. I thought I saw them flash red for a moment.

"What?" His brow twitched and his fist clenched at his side. "You don't mean that. . ." I could see his teeth gritting together his fang protruded from his lower lip, biting into it. Drawing blood.

"I'm so sorry InuYasha." I finally let my tears fall. "I can't do it anymore. I tried. But it's too much. I wanted to remain here with you. . .I wanted you to want me with you. But I know now that it's impossible. I saw. . ." I let my sentence die and he knew what I was talking about. "I know what I saw." I spoke again, this time breathlessly.

"Kagome. . ." I knew he could say nothing. I expected him to say nothing.

"When I leave you won't have to feel guilty anymore. It won't be a secret. You'll never have to sneak around and you'll never have to explain yourself to anyone. Consider it a present." I said, offering him a small smile. "It's the last thing I can give to you."

"Don't." He shook his head. "Just wait a second. You're getting too ahead of yourself here, wench. If you could just let me explain I-"

I cut him off. "You don't have to explain anything. I understand. I'm not stupid."

"I have no clue what you're fucking saying!" He howled finally. He stepped forward and captured my wrist in his hand. I cringed at the pressure. I prayed he didn't slip and snap it in half. "What did you see?"

I snorted. "I'm not even going to answer that. I saw what you were doing!" His grip immediately loosened. "And it makes me sick!"

"I. . .Kagome?" His hand fell away from my wrist. His face was etched in misery and his golden eyes fell in sync with his ears. "What you saw? It disgusted you?" He asked as if it weren't obvious.

It made the fury leak out of me in a frenzy. "Of course it did! How couldn't it? Are you that dense?" I shoved him away from me and he didn't even falter for a second. He just stood rooted in the same spot, eyes downcast and ears drooped like a lost, wounded animal.

"I never thought you could say that to me." He said solemnly.

"Well what do you think? That it would be a good thing for me to see? That it wouldn't hurt me? I'm sorry InuYasha." I turned away from him leaning over the well. "I've made up my mind that this is definitely for the best."

"You're going to listen to me first!" He jerked me towards him, spinning me around to look into my eyes. "What you saw. . .I'm sorry Kagome. I know you must hate me. . .but I needed to do it. I had to do it. . .There was nothing else I could do. It meant a lot to me. . .I don't want to dishonor you. . .but." His cheeks burned with a bright shade of crimson. "I don't know how else to do it."

Now I was furious. How dare he say this to my face? Blinking back tears I stepped away from him, mortified. "Sometimes InuYasha. I don't even know how I fell in love with you." I admitted harshly, every syllable dripped with venom. Before he could respond I was jumping into the depths of the well, letting a familiar blue light caress my broken heart. I could swear I heard someone wailing before I touched down in the Modern Era. Funny. It could have been my own heart wailing. I sank to my knees, clutching at my chest. My body quaked unnaturally.

But it didn't matter.

I left today. Never to return.

Note: Hmm. How odd. :)

This is the rewrite for Leaving Today. The original oneshot will be posted elsewhere so I won't have to lose my older style. I'm sorry for the sudden change everyone. But I felt like it had to be done. It was driving me nuts. And now it'll actually fit into my story and the upcoming chapters. Thanks to everyone who reviewed the orginal oneshot. I really appreciate this.