"You're like a black Mary Poppins!"

The friends laughed and chatted animatedly as they started making their way back to the loft, eager to begin the very last leg of Nick's bar crawl. It had been a rough night for Nick. Although he had tried his best to put on a brave face after his breakup with Kai, he had all but fallen apart a few minutes before as he admitted to his friends that he just had nothing to do anymore. It wasn't that long ago that Nick had been extremely excited to embark on his new business ventures with Schmidt, but now? Now, he felt aimless, lost, confused…All he had wanted to do was to get better, and now he found himself almost exactly where he had begun.

Thank goodness for his friends.

Nick trailed quietly on his stocking feet behind the group as they continued their various conversations. His hands stuck deep in his pockets, he couldn't stop a small, sideways smile from crossing his face. They had his back. He knew that.

And even she, despite everything they had been through, managed to show her support for him when it felt as if he was being pulled down into nothingness. She was the first one to come back out of the bar to check on him. She was the one who wanted to make sure he was able to fly out to Chicago to see his family at Christmas. She was the one who constantly told him that he "deserved better" even when he wasn't sure that he deserved it himself.

He stared at the back of Jess's head, her arm wrapped around Ryan's waist, his snaking around her shoulder. Nick shook his head a little to clear his thoughts. Where did he stand with Jess these days? They had been so distant for so long that it was hard to tell anymore. Were they acquaintances? Friends? Or were they simply destined to be roommates and nothing more? At that moment, Jess turned her head around slightly and caught his eye. Nick's breath hitched a bit as she stared at him with her big, blue eyes, and gave him a small, reassuring smile. He returned her grin, and locked his eyes with hers until Ryan's words drew her attention away from Nick. Nick sighed slightly as Winston clapped him on the back and began talking with him. The distraction was more than welcome.

An hour later, the atmosphere of apartment 4D was one of great joviality. Schmidt and Ryan listened to Coach as he gushed about the girl he had met that night, while Jess and Cece whispered about something a little more serious in the corner of the kitchen. Nick could only presume that they were discussing whether or not Jess had decided to move in with Ryan. For as well as he knew her, Nick was having a difficult time reading her reactions as she spoke with Cece. Finding he was getting nowhere with his analysis, he headed toward the fridge to grab another beer. However, when he returned to the living room, Ryan and Jess were standing in front of the couch, trying to command the attention of the others.

"Hey guys? Guys! Ryan and I have an important announcement to make," Jess said, pointing to the couch to signal them to have a seat.

Nick's heart sank. Well. This was it. This is when Jess would announce that she was moving in with Ryan and that life as Nick knew it would be over. Forever.

Everyone's conversations subsided as they sank onto the sofa, eyes fixated on Jess and Ryan. Nick slowly shuffled toward the couch and stood behind it, frozen in place. He saw Winston crane his neck slightly from where he was sitting to give Nick a sympathetic glance.

He took a deep breath, closed his eyes, and braced for impact.

"Hello, everyone. Thanks very much for your attention," Ryan began. "I just wanted to inform you all that I have been offered the position of headmaster at my old school, Wellington Preparatory, in England. And after talking it over with Jess tonight, she and I have decided that I should accept the job!"

The room was silent. Nick could hear the wheels in everyone's brains turning a mile a minute. Surely this couldn't mean… Wait, did this mean that Jess wasn't merely moving a few minutes away, but rather...a few thousand miles away?

Nick Miller felt something collapse inside of him. His chest heaved as he realized that his worst fear was becoming a reality. Even though she wasn't his girlfriend anymore, and maybe she wasn't even his friend, he had always worried about the day when they would go their separate ways. True, the way Nick and Jess had continued to live together as roommates was extremely unconventional, but he had unwillingly and quite unintentionally become dependent on her quirky presence and charisma that always seemed to permeate the loft. And the notion of Jess being stripped from his life so suddenly to go live with her British boyfriend abroad sent a thousand tiny razors slicing into his stomach, causing him to double over as if he had just been punched in the gut.

Nick's face must have looked as pained as he felt, because when Jess saw him from across the room, her bright, cheery smile instantly morphed into a frown that creased her forehead and tugged her eyebrows downward. Her eyes darted between Nick and Ryan for a few seconds before Nick dropped his chin down toward his chest in defeat.

"And….uh….yes," Jess continued, trying to break the awkward silence that had settled in the loft. "Ryan is accepting the position and I'm so happy and so proud of him. So he will be moving back to England and we have decided that we will do the whole long distance…uh...thing."

Nick's stomach flipped as his brain slowly processed the words Jess had just uttered. Was this real? Could it be? Did this mean that Jess wasn't leaving Los Angeles after all? He lifted his head, straightening his back slightly, and for the third time that night, his brown eyes locked with the blue ones of Jessica Day. He had no idea how he was feeling in that moment. The emotions he was experiencing were equal parts relieved, indifferent, elated, and sympathetic, all mixed together in a cocktail that sent his head spinning. And the fact that he had been staring into Jess's eyes for what seemed like the better part of eternity did nothing to calm his dizziness any quicker.

What Jess and Ryan were saying must have finally registered with the others as they simultaneously jumped up off the couch and began hugging Jess and shaking hands with Ryan, congratulating him on his new position. Nick wandered over as well, giving Ryan a firm shake.

"Congratulations, man. That's great news. Good luck over there."

"Thanks, mate," Ryan responded. He glanced quickly at Jess before continuing his conversation with Nick. "It will be a difficult transition to be sure, but I'm very excited as well."

It was not lost on Nick what exactly Ryan meant by "a difficult transition." He was leaving Jess behind, for whatever reason. Nick knew firsthand how hard it was to be apart from Jess for too long, and they already lived together. If he were still with Jess, he couldn't imagine leaving her for anything. Not ever. In fact, the range of emotions he had experienced over the last few minutes had more than confirmed that.

Breaking from his reverie, Nick said, "You'll do great. It sounds like something that is important to both of ya."

A few minutes later, Ryan announced to the group that he needed to get going to formally accept his position by means of a Skype call. Nick watched as Jess walked Ryan to the door, but quickly turned his head and winced when she kissed her boyfriend goodbye. Nick flopped onto the couch and took a few long gulps of his beer to try and quiet the millions of thoughts and questions running through his mind. Why did Ryan accept a job so far away? Why isn't Jess going with him when she seemed to be ready to move in with him? Why would she rather stay here? Is she having second thoughts? How do I feel about this? I shouldn't feel happy…should I? Don't get your hopes up, Miller. Why would you be so dumb as to even entertain the idea that this means anything at all? She's with Ryan. She loves him. Move on, man. Just move on already.

Over the next half hour, the roommates and their booze-induced brains started making their way toward their respective rooms to sleep off the excitement of the evening. Coach practically skipped to his room in his state of giddiness, Winston half-carried Schmidt back to his, and Jess tucked a very intoxicated Cece into Jess's bed for the night. Nick stayed planted on the sofa as this all unfolded, willing himself to stop obsessing over Jess and Ryan and the broken state of his relationship with Jess. He had been foolish to think that their friendship could be repaired after the break up. As much as couples always say that they will be friends afterward, that is hardly ever the case. In fact, Jess had only been helping him over the last few months because she was a kind person. She would do the same for any of her other roommates, of this he was completely certain. Nick was by no means special in her eyes. Not anymore.

He closed his eyes as he tried to come to terms with this fact, and was just about to drift off to sleep when he felt the leather sectional bounce next to him.

"Hey." Nick heard her sweet voice and quickly opened his eyes to study the woman now sharing the couch with him. Jess was still wearing her dress from that evening, but had changed her hair by throwing it into a loose ponytail. She didn't look particularly relaxed-she was sitting on the edge of the sofa, her right knee bouncing up and down and her hands playing nervously with her phone. The only unwavering aspect of her demeanor was the way her gaze held his purposefully. Again.

"Hey," Nick replied, a little shakily. He watched her twitching leg anxiously and cleared his throat before speaking again. "You okay?"

That seemed to shake Jess from her trance. "What? Me? Oh yeah, I'm fine! It's just been a crazy night. That's all."

Nick chuckled. "Yeah, you could say that. And congratulations to Ryan again. That's awesome for him."

Jess shifted uncomfortably in her seat and studied her phone intently as her head bobbed up and down. "Yeah...I'm...really proud of him. It will be weird to do long distance, but it will be okay." She fiddled with the case on her phone a bit. Suddenly, she drew her eyes to his and held his gaze once more. "But actually Nick, I came here to talk to you. How are you doing? Are you okay?"

"I….uh...I'm fine, Jess. Why do you ask?"

Jess continued to stare at him. It was an intense, no-nonsense stare, as if she was able to see right through his eyes and into his soul. He felt his heart begin to race as he was reminded of a time when he was allowed to respond to this kind of intensity by reaching for her waist, pulling her to him, cupping her face in his hand and...Nick gulped, trying to quell the runaway train of thoughts coursing through his brain.

"Nick, I know you. You're not okay," she continued. He didn't stop her. "Nothing about this last week has shown any indication that you're okay. I'm worried about you. Talk to me."

Nick was caught completely off guard. He was certain that in the midst of everything that had happened for her this evening, his personal drama didn't even come close to what she had gone through over the last few hours. She said she is worried about me. Yet here she was, coming back to him, making a point to check on him to ensure that he was doing all right. Just like always.I can't believe she is worried about me! Nick felt his resolve begin to melt away, and realized that he no longer felt compelled to mask the internal struggle that he had used the bar crawl, or hiding in his room, or drinking, to conceal.

He broke eye contact with Jess and sighed. His voice was barely audible. "I just want to be better," Nick whispered. "I'm sick and tired of feeling like I have no direction. I didn't think this is how my life would be at this point. I mean, I never really had a plan, but I didn't expect to feel this-this-lost." His voice broke a little as he spoke that word, and he had to pause to swallow the lump in his throat that was forming. Stealing a glance at Jess, she appeared to be listening to him just as intently as ever.

"And what happened when I finally started to envision a greater purpose for myself? Well, I lost my girlfriend because of it, that's what. It's either I'm too ambitious or not ambitious enough, and I can't seem to find the combination that would make everyone happy."

Nick didn't expect so many of his emotions to pour out so freely. He didn't expect to be confessing these things, especially to Jess.

Jess, the woman with whom he had fallen in love the moment she walked through the door.

Jess, his room friend. And rival. And confidant. And rival again. And confidant some more.

Jess, the girl he realized he would do anything for.

Jess, the one who broke his heart.

Jess, his roommate. Just the girl across the hall, and nothing more.

As Nick continued to fight with the emotions that threatened to break him down once and for all, he felt her warm hand wiggle its way into his. This simple act caused him to look at their intertwined hands, then immediately up at her clear blue eyes. He was shocked to discover the tears that were welling up inside of them.

"Nick, listen to me," Jess began. "You have no idea how much it pains me to hear you talk about yourself like this. I meant what I said before. You are smart, and you are talented, and you need to use those talents to accomplish something you really love. Find something that makes you really happy and don't worry about pleasing other people. I know it's hard, but focus on you for a minute. Think. What is it that makes you really happy?"

You. You make me happy. When the thought popped into his mind, he found that it took even him by surprise. Nick hadn't had a great deal of interaction with Jess over the last few months, so he was shocked that he was so quickly able to equate his happiness to her. Yet, for however much he wanted to express this true happiness, he knew he couldn't do that. Not here, not now. Not when she was about to begin a long distance relationship with the man she loved. It wouldn't be fair to her. She had enough going on in her life already. He didn't want to be the one to provide her with any unnecessary stress.

So, as a consolation, he squeezed her hand. A simple squeeze that simultaneously thanked her for her concern and showed her how much he had missed her like this: Two people who shared an unmistakable bond and would always care for each other, no matter their history.

"I don't know exactly what it is that makes me happy, but I think I'm slowly starting to figure it out." Nick shot her a lopsided smile, which made her grin from ear to ear.

"I'll be here when you do, Nick. I'll be there to support you in whatever it is you want to accomplish, because I believe in you. And I'm proud of you. And I know things have been weird and everything, but I wanted you, needed you to know that."

He squeezed her hand again as he felt water begin to form in his own eyes. Nick had no idea how much he had needed to hear that from Jess until she had said it. She was so important to him. Her opinion meant the world to him. And suddenly, he felt a weight lift from his heart as he realized that he would keep working to be better if it meant that it would make Jess happier too.

Jess, the woman who annoyed him more than anyone ever had before.

Jess, the girl who could make him laugh even in the craziest of circumstances.

Jess, his roommate. The girl across the hall.

Now Jess, his burgeoning confidant and friend once again.

And oh, how he had missed that friend.

She released his hand and laced her arms around his neck, pulling him into a tight embrace. He buried his nose in her hair for the first time in what felt like ages. He reveled in her warmth and her scent, wishing the moment would never end. And although it couldn't have lasted for more than a few seconds, this particular moment with his very best room friend did indeed feel as if it lasted for an eternity.

But in a good way.

Nick and Jess pulled back from each other, and Nick was met with a light punch on his arm.

"And would you hurry up and figure out what it is you want to do, already?" Jess teased. "Because when you're in your element, you become grumpy and opinionated, and I really miss you yelling at me about how I am wrong about everything on a nearly daily basis."

Nick couldn't help but laugh at that comment. It felt good to laugh. "Okay, Jess, I promise that I'll do my best."

"That's all I'm asking for, Nick."

One last squeeze of his shoulder, and she was standing up, heading toward her room for the night. Just as she reached her door, she paused and pointed some finger guns at him.

"Good night, Miller."

Nick smiled widely in spite of himself.

"Good night, Day."

Jess walked into her room and shut the door.

Nick fell back against the couch cushions and found his body and brain relax for the first time in over a week. His eyes closed slowly and his wide smile stayed plastered to his face.

For the first time in a long while, Nick truly believed he was going to get better.