Emu: Hello! I be Emu, if you hadn't guessed. I would just like to say that I don't own any IZ, Jhonen, Toys R Us, JTHM characters, or any other spoofs/references of things I may use. So don't sue because 1 you wouldn't get much except and evil cat and 2 I like my house and money. Right Mr. Spooky?

Spooky: Squeak!

Tenna: HEY! You can't have SPOOKY!!

Emu: Uh oh 0.0 must be off, BYE! Runs away from a screaming Tenna

Jhonen grabbed another handful of his beloved caffeine pills and desperately tried to fight the on-sluaght of dizzying sleep. Yawning, he grasped a pencil and madly set to work on his next brilliant achievement. After about 3 hours of erasing, re-drawing, and cursing at the pencil for continually breaking on purpose, he stood back and smiled deviously at his new creation.

         "It's so beautiful!" he sighed. "This is defiantly my best work yet! And look! It only took me…3 HOURS?! Um…0.0 Maybe the clock is off. Drat! What am I supposed to do for the rest of the night?! Erm, morning now. Wait, if it just now turned 1:00 A.M. then it would NOW be morning. So what I said was right but only then because at present the time has changed because the earth's current position, but WAIT! How do I know the clock isn't off?! And why am I talking to myself?"

         Jhonen glanced irritably at the clock waiting for an answer. The clock in turn started to hum and continue ticking, oblivious to the events that had just transpired. Sighing, Jhonen slumped into his chair and tried to rack his brains for something to amuse himself. It didn't take long for him to come up with an elaborate plan. Jumping out of his chair he wildly exclaimed, " I know what I shall do! Why go through the trouble of drawing my characters when I can bring them to life!" Yes, sad to say he had been watching Frankenstein WAY too many times. He laughed maniaclly and set to work conceiving a device to bring life to his insane creations.

         After an hour of compiling a list of greatly needed objects in order to build his all-powerful device, Jhonen quickly went over a checklist. "Alright, due to my calculations I will need some wires. Glances at his now ransacked microwave Check. Got plenty of those and if I run out, there's always the phone. Let's see… a spatula. Got it. A couple of screws and a LOT of glue. Check. A helmet never can be too careful when trying to avoid mass head trauma. Some electric tools. Hehehe Have 'em. A treadmill, yep. A picture of a moose. YYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS! And… A LIVE CHICKEN?! Oh great! Where am I gonna find a live chicken at this hour?! Hmm…I wonder if you can order them…Nah. Looks as though I'll have to go to the Toys R Us store. (AN: Yes, I'm calling it its real name for now. After all, he hasn't been sucked into his world of madness yet now has he? Of course, you might be fooled) In these days, there's no telling what is now considered a toy." So, Jhonen ran to the nearest Toys R Us store after realizing he had taken his car apart earlier for some other experiment.

         Huffing and puffing, Jhonen cautiously entered the store after playing briefly with the automatic doors. (AN: HEY! It's fun!) Looking around, he slowly sauntered over to a stuffed animal aisle and started searching for a chicken. (AN: I mean if you can't have a LIVE chicken an imitation is the next best thing. They are just as dumb right?) Jhonen was about half way through the aisle when all of a sudden a little demonic looking girl ran up.

         "Ooooohhhhh…0.o Hey mister! Are you…are you….are…y-you…"

         "Am I what?!" exclaimed Jhonen irritably.

         "Are you…MY DADDY?!"

         "AM I WHAT?!!"

         "You are aren't you?!" squealed the now very evil looking child as her eyes bugged out of her head. "Mommy told me you ran away with some other lady but you didn't! I know, you got lost here looking for a toy for me didn't you?! DIDN'T YOU?!!!!"

         "W-w-what?" stuttered a now VERY freaked out Jhonen. "No! I've never seen you before in my entire life!"

         "But, I love you daddy." The girl's lip began to quiver as she tried desperately not to cry.

         "Look kid, I'm sorry but I am DEFINATLY NOT your daddy!"

         The girl stood silent for about 10 seconds before wailing her head off for the whole world to hear. "DADDY DOESN"T LOVE ME NO MORE! WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!" (AN: Some lungs on that one.0.0)

         All the while, Jhonen was anxiously trying to slink away before the girl drew the attention of the whole store. Of course, he had no such luck. Shocked customers began to turn and stare questionably at the spectacle and soon began glaring angrily at Jhonen.

         "Can you believe that?" whispered a teenager to what people could only assume was her grandmother. "What a horrible father to make his kid cry like that! Someone ought to call security!" The grandmother (AN: We hope!) in turn shook her head sympathetically. Upon hearing the words security, Jhonen tried apprehensively to shut the kid up but to no avail. In a matter of moments, a team of big, fat, stinky guards waddled over and drew their nightsticks threateningly.

         Jhonen knowing that he was in for it if he stuck around, tried one last time to quiet the child before jumping out a window and screaming at the top of his lungs, " I AM NOT HER DADDY!!!!!!!!!!" Then hitting the ground, he staggered away towards his house.

         Halfway to his house though, (AN: Oh come on. You didn't honestly think I would let him go  that easy did you?^_^) he chanced to hear a mysterious chanting and followed it down a side ally. Ducking behind an old box he peered ahead into what appeared to be a circle of cloaked figures near a fire. The chanting quickened and one cloaked figure departed but soon returned with a silver tray. Ripping his attention from the bizarre cloaked figures, Jhonen looked to the silver tray and what might his eyes behold but…A FROG!

         The VERY plump frog yawned lazily and belched loudly. It wasn't an unusual frog at all. It was the basic green, warty, and apparently disgusting amphibian that most people are used to. Jhonen wrinkled up his nose in disgust and was about to leave when the frog did something most unexpected – it talked!

         "My dear friends!" it bellowed. "We of the cult of ribbit and cluck have gathered here to pay our due respects to our holy god…the almighty BEEF!!!" A cheer erupted through the crowd and Jhonen could have sworn that he head some of the "followers" cluck. "We have stayed in the dark for too long! Getting squished by trucks and chased by the accursed KENTUCKY MAN!" (AN: Sings Kentucky Fried Chicken and a Pizza Hut. A Pizza Hut. A Pizza Hut. Kentucky Fried Chicken and a Pizza Hut!) Hisses resounded through the crowd at the mention of such a horrible name. "Yes, my friends I know that it stings. Don't fear though, our time has come to rise up and rule as we were always meant to! You may lower your hoods!"

         Slowly, all the surrounding figures lowered their hoods to reveal….GASP…CHICKENS?! (AN: All right, who didn't see that one coming? Come on! Come on, speak up.  HA! You all owe me a cookie!) Jhonen at this point couldn't decide if he should run screeching at the top of his lungs or try to stop these evil fowls, oh and a frog. Naturally, he stayed still and continued to watch. The frog now held his hands; er whatever you would call them, high into the air and a hush settled on the crowd.

         "Now, if we really wish to achieve such a worthy goal, (AN: Yeah right!) we must honor the BEEF by a sacrifice!" At the end of the frog's speech the crowd started to roar, " SAC-RI-FICE! SAC-RI-FICE!" All heads turned towards a sickly looking rooster who tried to inch away in fear.

         "Now little one! No need to fear, it is a great honor that will be bestowed upon you!"

         "Then you get sacrificed!" croaked the poor wretched soul as he was hoisted over the fire.

         "Tut. Tut. I cannot be the blessed sacrifice, for who would lead you mindless, err I mean gifted beings?"

         "I could do it!" cried the rooster in despair but was then thrown into the fire. All the remaining chickens put on sunglasses and oohhhhed and awwwwed. Meanwhile, Jhonen had just about all he could handle and sprung from behind the box at the surprised chicken mass.

         "You are all DOOM-ED! For I require a chicken and a chicken I shall have one!!!!!!!"  Pouncing at the nearest chicken, he stuffed it securely in a bag and pushed the others into a wall. (AN: A bag? How convenient.^-^) Turning, he set his sights on the demon frog, lunged forward, and grasped it tightly over the fire.

         "Wait! You cannot destroy me!" shrieked the frog.

         "How come?"

         "Because I am the supreme BEEF master! I was destined to rule this planet!"

         "Really? Welp, now you're destined to be dinner!" Jhonen was about to drop the squirming frog into the fire when a bolt of lightning struck and electrified it. "Hmmmm….I guess that works just as well." Jhonen shrugged and then triumphantly and started trotting home. (AN: He couldn't exactly walk with a struggling chicken too well)

         After yet another hour of complete insanity, Jhonen had successfully put together his precarious device. (AN: This thing is so weird I'm not even going to attempt to describe it! Though, if you must know something it looked sort of like a treadmill that exploded, was hooked to a TV, had the moose picture tacked to it, and the helpless chicken running for dear life. Poor, poor chicken) Laughing madly, he placed his helmet firmly on his head and threw a near by switch.

         "YESSSSS! WORK! WORK! RUN FASTER YOU DORKY CHICKEN! MOVE YOUR FLUFFY LEGS!!!!!!!!!"

         "Hey," panted the chicken. "This isn't easy and you expect me to be motivated by a picture of a moose? Why couldn't you have put corn meal or a worm in front of me?"

         "SILENCE! FEAR the moose for it is coming!"

         "Allllllllrighty then."

         "Good! Now for the final touch." Searching wildly, Jhonen soon found an episode of IZ and popped it into the now smoking TV set. He then pulled another switch. Nothing happens AHEM, he pulled ANOTHER switch. Jhonen can be seen watching the TV and deeply admiring his work HEELLLO! ANYBODY HOME?!

         "Huh? Oh yeah." Jhonen threw the switch. Thank you! Dancing around with joy, Jhonen began singing. "WHOOO HOOO They will live. LIVE I TELL YOU!!!!!!!!!

         "What freak have I been abducted by this time?" muttered the chicken.

         "YOU RUN! NO TALKING! Now let's see as my creations LIVE!"

         "Whatever."

         Jhonen turned expectantly to the TV when he was blinded by none other then the moose picture that had fallen off his device. "I'm BLIND! THE MOOSE! THE MOOOOOOOOSSSEEEEEEEE!" He screamed as he started to flail his arms. At that same moment, the TV started to flash brilliantly and become squishy. Jhonen continued yelling and trying to tear off the offending moose but slipped and fell into the TV. Into…ZIM LAND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

Emu:  Sorry about it being short. What will happen?! I don't know actually. I'm letting you all decide. Should Jhonen end up in:

A) Mrs. Bitters classroom as a new teacher or student

B) Professor Membrane's TV show

C) Zim's lab with Gir

D) On Irk

E) OR Inside Gaz's gameslave The horror! THE HORROR!

Emu: I'm leaving Jhonen's fate in your gooey hands, so review and tell me what must happen!

Cat: Great, fools decided the fate of one poor, poor soul.

Emu: ACK! You invaded AGAIN?!

Cat: You got it.

Emu: NO! NOT THIS TIME! Excuse me while I pound a certain fur head.

Cat: Huh?0.o HELP!