A/N: So i just had this idea last night. It's not very long but i had to write it. I hope you enjoy it, reviews are always appreciated.
Disclaimer: I don't own a thing, though if someone wants to give me Milo for xmas i will have no complaints
The Consequences of Saying No
Rory had sat there all night watching Logan be the biggest jerk in the world to Jess. Getting drunk off his ass, and mocking him. Making a fool of himself. Making a fool of her. Then finally Jess had had enough, she watched as he stood up from his seat across the table, and walked out the door. He left. Not wasting any time she rushed after him, telling Logan not to follow. Outside, she apologised, trying to defend her drunk boyfriend, but not surprisingly he wasn't really what Jess was bothered about. He was more bothered about what she was doing with her life. She listened to the words as he spoke them,
"I know you, I know you better than anyone. This isn't you. What are you doing? Living at your grandparents' place, being in the DAR, no Yale. Why did you drop out of Yale?...It's not complicated, this isn't you. This, going out with this jerk, with a Porsche, we made fun of guys like this... This isn't about him, ok, screw him. What's going on with you? This isn't you, Rory. You know it isn't. What's going on?" His words were forceful and impassioned, trying to get through to her. Her own responses didn't matter, she didn't even really think about them, they were an automatic defence to his questions. Until she finally answered in complete truth that she didn't know what was going on with her.
He just nodded, touched her shoulder and told her that maybe they would catch up at a better time, before walking away. He turned back though, wishing her a Happy Birthday, she didn't think he would have remembered. With a sad smile he walked away, she stood in place for a moment watching him before looking back towards the bar. She took a step to go back inside then changed her mind, changing direction and rushing away from the bar, she saw him about to get into his car and called out his name,
"I've messed up."
Jess looked back up at the sound of her voice, he turned around to look at her. He stood where he was and waited for her to reach him and continue.
"I messed up," she repeated, "things just got out of control. I started hanging around with Logan and his friends, partying and drinking. His dad told me I didn't have what it takes and I was already feeling so out of control that I let myself believe him."
Jess looked confused, "what do you mean his dad said you weren't good enough? You're not good enough for his son?"
Rory shook her head, "not good enough to be a journalist. He said I don't have what it takes, he owns all these newspapers and I was interning at one and I believed him because it's his job to know who has what it takes. When he said that, everything I had wanted so long just crumbled."
Jess looked sympathetic "You told me years ago that you were going to be Christiane Amanpour. You were so sure of it, why did you let some rich asshole change that?"
She could only shrug, "I don't know."
They stood in silence, neither knowing what to say. The chill of the night air made Rory wrap her arms around herself a little, but neither moved or seemed like they intended to do so any time soon. Finally Jess asked
"So that's what caused all this? That's what sent you out of control?"
Se stood there thinking about it. Was that what had done it? Or was it really just an easier excuse. A less complicated reason. Deep down she knew that things had been going wrong long before that day when Mitchum had said what he did, that had simply been the final push that sent her over the edge. She knew the moment that had started it all. Taking a deep sigh she came clean.
"It started the moment I said no."
Jess wore a look of confusion, not verbally asking for her to elaborate, just waiting and hoping that she would. After a moment she did.
"The minute I said no to you, when you came to Yale and asked me to go with you and I said no. You left and from then on everything went wrong. I had an affair with Dean," she saw his jaw tighten when she admitted that but he said nothing, "the biggest mistake I ever made, but once it started I wanted to prove everyone wrong and so I didn't stop it. Then I met Logan and the partying started I was a whole other person. And I liked it because it was easier, I could forget how much I was hurting. I could act like I was happy but I wasn't."
Jess didn't interrupt once throughout her speech but as soon as she finished he had to ask,
"So all of this is my fault?"
"No," she replied forcefully, "It's my fault because I said no. I said no and I know that I shouldn't have. I knew I wanted to be with you. It was exactly like you said, I had known it the first time I met you but our relationship had been so unstable and I was terrified of it not working again. I was trying to protect myself but in the end all I did was destroy myself."
Jess nodded, softly saying "I'm sorry," barely above a whisper. She offered a small, sad smile and after waiting a few minutes to see if any ore would be said she turned away. She began walking back to where she had come from before. It was over now, that was all she could think. It was definitely over. She had admitted to herself what the real problem was, and she had told him and now she had to let it go. She was walking slowly away from him, out of his life, when his voice stopped her,
"What if I asked you again?"
Frowning she turned to look at him, "what?"
He didn't repeat his question, instead he asked the next one on his mind
"Come with me." Upon Rory's shocked look he carried on, "I love you, I never stopped loving you. I still believe that we're meant to be together."
"Weren't you just yelling at me about dropping out of Yale?"
She was right, "then if I have to, I'll come here. I don't want to lose you again Rory. If we have one last chance then I'll do what it takes, even if that means being here, but, if you say no this time then that's it. It'll be over, for good. I'll leave you alone. Will you come with me?"
Rory was speechless, her mind was screaming an answer at her but the words wouldn't come out of her mouth. Jess took that as a no, and turned away, but he had not walked more than a couple of feet when she finally regained her voice,
"Okay," Jess turned quickly back around. She smiled at him, "ok, I'll go with you." He didn't get a chance to reply before she had closed the space between them and was kissing him, wrapping his arms around her, he smiled as they drew apart.
"So where do you want to go?"
"For now? Take me to Stars Hollow, take me home. After that, we'll figure it out." He nodded at her, smiling. Removing his arms from around her he took her hand and led her to his car.
