Title: Dead Sea
Pairing: Meg/Cas Dean/Cas Dean/Lisa
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: TBA
Disclaimer: Not my characters. The characters belong to Supernatural and the creators yadda yadda.
Warnings: none?
Summary: Castiel has always been gay, but he cares more about pleasing his parents- particularly his mother, and especially after she is diagnosed with terminal breast cancer. Castiel goes to school, gets married and has a kid. After the death of his mother, everything falls apart.
A/N: I need to edit all of this and stuff.

Castiel Novak had always known he was gay. His siblings knew he was gay, and anyone with a half decent gaydar knew he was gay.

His parents were a different story entirely. Maybe they knew and just decided it was unacceptable. Gay was part of who Castiel was, but there was a much greater part of him that needed the approval of his parents, particularly his mother.

"Cas, sweetie" she would coo as she ran her fingers through his hair as they watched Gilmore Girls together "Find yourself a wonderful girl like Lorelai. Marry her and have beautiful babies"

When his Mother found out she had breast cancer while he was finishing his degree, he latched on to the best thing he could find and did exactly what his mother asked. Megra was working on her Psycology degree while Castiel finished his in Advocacy, they had known eachother since day one of the graduate program and she had even been home to meet his family a couple of times. His father was already convinced that they were "an item".

While his father was never too pleased with his degree, he relented on pressuring Castiel about it once he began to receive job offers from all over the country. Castiel may not have been doing exactly what his father wanted, but he was doing it well.

The night he told his family that he accepted the job offer with a firm in New York so that he could stay close by while his mother went through treatment he took them all his parents, Meg and his siblings (Gabriel, Anna, Uriel and Balthazar) to Sarai's favorite resturant- Bouley. Once he told them about his decision to work at that firm and he saw his mother's smile, he got down on one knee and asked Meg to be his wife.

Megra and Castiel were married in the late spring of 2007 on Partridge Island. His mother wore a beautiful wig, and had just finished her first cycle of treatment. The prognosis still looked bleak, but that day Sarai Novak beamed with a light that Castiel hadn't seen since looking at pictures of when she and his father Abraham were married. Castiel wasn't sure how much like Lorelai Megra was, but she got along with his mother like they had known one another forever.

Castiel wasted no time in doing what he considered his duty. He was by no means a virgin, but the wedding night was his first time with a woman, and also his first time with Megra. She was all he could have asked for in a friend and in a wife (if he was going to have one), and she was a perfect mother.

Ishmael James Novak was born in February of 2008.

In May Sarai was deemed terminal, and there was nothing more that her doctors could do for her. Castiel could see her waning, but she did her best to act as though everything was fine. She beamed at her sweet grandson and continued to glow brightly until just before she died on June 9th 2009.

A year later on the anniversary of her death, Abraham killed himself.

All of the Novak children gathered to arrainge their father's funeral. His wishes were simple enough, and everything still fell to pieces. Balthazar and Uriel were Abraham's golden children, they both played sports through high school and went to college on full-ride scholarships. They currently co-owned their own business manufacturing every kind of plastic Castiel had ever heard of. Castiel, Anna, and Gabriel held no ill will towards their father, they found it understandable. Sarai was the love of his life, and after her death he was plagued with the guilt that he had never treated her as she deserved. Balthazar and Uriel were having none of it, they called him weak and cursed him for leaving them all on their own.

"Their anger isn't going to bring either of them back" Anna wept

"Fuck 'em" Gabriel threw his hands in the air "Fuck them both. Neither of them gave a shit when Mom died, so they can just go fuck themselves" He went to the window and wept where he thought nobody would see him.

Fuck them. Fuck them both. Fuck them all.

Castiel gathered his coat and left.

When he arrived home he laid divorce papers on the table. Meg signed them. She smiled and ran her fingers through his hair. "Find yourself a good man, Castiel"

Six Months Later

Castiel took Megra out the day their divorce was final.

"So who's the lucky fella?" Meg crooned over her drink as Castiel nearly spit his out

"Me? No, nobody yet" he composed himself and was glad that it was white wine. "You?"

"Crowley, you remember Michael Crowley from accounting? You do, you met him at the Christmas party" Castiel nodded at the memory "Watercooler gossip says he's supposed to ask me out any day now. There's a pool about when. My Money's on the end of the week"

"Ooooh!" he teased and wiggled his shoulders.

They enjoyed the rest of their dinner together talking about holiday plans, Ishmael, work, and more about Crowley.

After finishing Castiel walked Meg to the street and hailed her a cab.

"You know, I never thanked you"

"For what"

"Marrying me when you knew I was gay"

"Oh, sweet child" she cupped his face before sliding into the backseat of the cab "I'd do it all over again in a heartbeat"

Castiel went home that night and sobbed. Meg had loved him whole-heartedly and he had used her and tossed her away when he was finished. He knew he should regret it, but when he thought of his mother's smile on the day of their wedding, or when Ishmael was born, he couldn't; and he felt even worse. Meg deserved all the love and the world, and for the way he was he loved her the best way he could love a woman, but it wasn't what Meg truly deserved, and she had accepted it without reservation knowing exactly what she was getting into.

he hadn't talked with any of his sibling since the day at the funeral home. Anna stilled called daily, and Gabriel at least once a week (because Anna begged him to, of course). The rest of his siblings had made up, and Castiel was the odd Novak out. He poured more guilt into a glass and it went down just as hard as the first glass.

Lucky for him the only thing he woke up with was a pounding headache that asprin refused to dull. He decided he was going to make amends, talk with his siblings, visit the nieces and nephews he hasn't seen, and some he hasn't even met. He was going to tell Megra how wonderful she is, and how much of an asshole he was.

These thoughts lept from his brain with a jolt of pain to worsen his headache as Dean Winchester slapped him on the back.

"Hear your a free man, Cas!"

About a year ago the firm brought in a company to help the place run more efficiently. Some people got laid off, and some new people hired. They also drastically changed the way they handled clients. Every associate had to fill out a most tedious personality test, and they were grouped together and given specific clients to work on. Dean and Cas were on a "team" with about 15 other people. The fact that they shared an office was purely chance. They firm planned to expand, and therefore took on about twice the staff. Everyone shared an office. Not that it was a problem, the offices were big enough for two with a kitchenette, and a couch and table that both seated four along with a workspace on either side of the office.

Dean was the closest thing that Castiel had to a "work friend", they got along well and spent most of their week together (albiet with clients or the boss), especially Fridays when they worked late to get everything finalized (which was why the offices were so nice, the boss made sure you didn't have to leave for almost anything).

Dean always made the coffee. He was proud of his "Secret" ingredient. Castiel had to admit that it was the best cup of coffee he had ever had. he was well aware that it was the nutmeg that Dean put in it, he had found the McCormick spice in the cupboard ages ago.

"Hey man, you okay?" Dean asked as he placed himself infront of Cas and grabbed him by the shoulders.

Cas rubbed at his forehead and straightened himself "Yeah, I'm good. Long night"

"I'll bet!" He winked and punched Cas in the shoulder "how was she?" he gestured his hands far from his chest and bobbed them around.

"He was fantastic" the wording fell from his lips before he had the chance to re-arrainge the words in his head.

"Oh, I-" Dean stammered and put his hands in his pockets.

"I didn't mean. Shit. I didn't mean gay. I mean, I'm gay. But I meant liquor, Jack Daniels" Castiel sighed "Remind me never to joke"

Castiel made it to the bathroom just in time to throw up.

Dean acted like the awful thing that happened never occurred. By the end of the week he was officially out to everyone on the team, and it just spread through the office. Only a handful of people were even fazed by the news. He wasn't nearly the only gay man in the firm, there were a group of about 5 or 6 that liked to go out to the local gay clubs, and they tried to get him to go out every Friday after he had come out.

"But Cassy!" Garth moaned "How you ever find yourself a nice black man if you don't come out with us?" he said in the worst impression of a female southern accent he had ever heard. Dean choked on his coffee. "Watch it Winchester, I'll bring you home, too"

Dean raised his mug over his head in their direction "I have the only hot black man I'll ever need. His name is Folgers"

"I have mountains of work to do, Garth" Castiel backed the group out of the door.

"You're not blowing us off next time, Novak" he wagged a finger at Cas as he left.

Castiel shut the door and tapped his head against it a few times.

"You can go if you want to, there really isn't that much paperwork left to do. I can finish it if you want to go our and have fun... Cassy"

"Do. Not." Castiel held the bridge of his nose. "That is by far the worst nickname I have ever had."

"Seriously though, you can go and have fun. Find yourself a nice black man" Dean pitifully mimicked Garth's awful female southern accent.

"Not that I'd mind a nice black man, and race isn't an issue, but where they're going I'm not going to find a nice man to settle down with" Castiel walked to his desk to finish off what was sure to be ice cold coffee by now only to find the mug empty. "They're a bunch of over-grown teenagers out to get their rocks off" He scoffed making his way to the coffee pot.

"Wait, you'll do it wrong!" Dean tripped around his desk to come take over the coffee maker. Castiel backed away slowly, hands in the air. Dean pushed him lightly away and Cas fell back onto the couch and rested the mug on his belly. He considered whether he should tell Dean that he knew about the nutmeg. Dean had his back to Castiel, making a big show about hiding the nutmeg.

Castiel mustered the lowest and most serious voice he could "I know your secret, Dean Winchester"

"What?" Dean squeaked dropping and nearly breaking the carafe.

"Seriously?" Castiel gasped "Did you just squeak?" he managed before he burst into laughter.

"N-no!" Dean picked up the carafe and placed it in its place

Castiel resumed his game, shoving his mug into Dean's chest. He instinctively grabbed it curling his hand around a good part of Castiel's.

"I know you're putting narcotics in my coffee" he deadpanned.

It took Dean thirty seconds of staring into the mug before laughing nervously and pulling the mug away

"You got me!" Placing both mugs on the counter and distributing sugar, he refused to make eye contact. Dean was never slow on the uptake of any joke, further proof to Castiel that he was just not good at this.

"I'm sorry" Castiel said as he sat back at his desk to continue writing every Business letter known to man. "I told you to remind me not to joke"

Dean filled the mugs and placed one on Castiels desk.

"Thank you" Castiel breathed. Dean smiled and drug his hand lightly across the desk pulling all the neat piles of paper into one ugly clump.

"You're an asshole" Castiel banged his head against his keyboard. "It doesn't matter, we're going to be here all night anyway" Castiel turned on his folk music playlist.

"Touche" Dean grumbled. He hummed to every song for the rest of the night.