Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters, they all belong to Bioware. Your views and reviews are all the payment I get.
A/N: Written for the Facebook Dragon Age Fanfiction Writers February Challenge. We were provided a list of "The 23 Sexiest Things You Do Without Even Knowing It" and were asked to "pick an OTP, and at least two things from the list. Gender doesn't matter, any rating, 1-3k one-shot. Have at it!"
Warning: It's fluffy and kinda cornball, but I enjoyed writing it. Title comes from one of the things on the list. ""Whenever I do work around the house, my wife gets horny. She calls it 'choreplay.'"
"We going to be here a few days, then?" Alistair asked as they were making camp in a grove outside the Brecilian Forest. They all needed a rest after dealing with Zathrian and the werewolves.
"I'd planned to be," Solona said. "Good hunting here, and the stream seems to have fish in it."
"Right, then," Alistair answered, and went digging through the packs. He found a hatchet and headed off into the woods.
"Ok, then, guess you're on wood gathering duty," Solona said. Better that than cooking, she supposed.
Alistair returned a while later, with an armload of logs. "Found a recently downed tree," he said, then went back for another load. By the time he was done there was enough wood for several days of campfires. Then he started splitting the logs into firewood.
*Thwack*
*Thwack*
At first the noise was annoying, then Solona made the mistake of looking over at him. He'd rolled up his sleeves, showing off his very muscular forearms. Solona bit her lip and turned away. She'd been cautiously flirting with the man since before Redcliffe, but she'd backed off a bit when Wynne had warned her that he'd be hurt. The older mage was right. He might be king one day, and Solona was a mage. Nothing could ever come of it. Maker, he was handsome, though.
*Thwack*
No harm in looking, right? Dinner was stew, although thankfully not that lamb and pea glop that Alistair had made. She could totally mind that while sitting and looking vaguely in Alistair's direction.
*Thwack*
Had his shoulders always been that broad?
*Thwack*
"Don't you have things you should be doing?" Wynne asked. Solona was openly staring now, stew completely forgotten.
*Thwack*
"Hmm? Oh, I'm making dinner," she said, gesturing at the stew bubbling away on the fire.
Wynne pursed her lips and then turned to see where Solona was looking.
*Thwack*
"Oh my," she said.
"I know! The best part? No one even asked him. He just started doing it."
"Really?" Wynne said, sitting down next to Solona.
*Thwack*
"Yes. All I said was that we would be camped here a while, as there's good hunting and foraging here, and we could all use a few days to rest after dealing with the Dalish, and next thing I know he's gathering wood. Once he finishes splitting that, I think we will be set for days."
*Thwack*
"You know, some of you could help with the herb gathering. I can only pick so much elfroot by myself," Leliana said, stepping up to Wynne and Solona.
*Thwack*
"We're busy," Wynne said.
Leliana looked to where the two women were watching. "Oh my...he has put on even more muscle since we've been traveling, hasn't he?" she murmured, sitting down next to Wynne.
*Thwack*
"Carrying three or four stone of armour all day every day will do that. If we're lucky, he'll take off his shirt," Solona said.
*Thwack*
"You know, my dear Warden, for someone who insisted that we stop to hunt and forage, you are doing very little of either….and I can see why," Zevran said, sitting down with no further ado.
*Thwack*
"And there goes the shirt," Wynne said.
"Aren't you old enough to be his mother?" Leliana asked.
"Oh, more than. But I'm old, not blind," Wynne cheerfully said. "Look at those shoulder blades as he swings the axe," she said.
*Thwack*
"And such impressive wood! So firm!" Zevran enthused. All three women rolled their eyes. Zevran grinned back at them, unrepentant.
*Thwack*
"Am I the only one who is doing any work in this camp? The rest of you are sitting around watching the fool swinging his...axe," Morrigan trailed off and stared for a moment..
"I must say, even though he is a fool, he is a well muscled fool," Morrigan said as she sat.
"No one even asked him, he is just taking care of it," Solona murmured.
"Hmph," Morrigan said, but Solona noticed she didn't look away.
Alistair finished splitting the firewood he'd gathered and rolled his shoulders to loosen up. He shook the sweat off and then raked his hands through his hair to make sure it was settled back into place. He noticed that the camp was quiet and looked around. Sten was on watch with Dog, but everyone else was sitting by the cookfire, because apparently it took four people to make dinner.
He wandered over to see what they'd come up with.
"So, what are we having?" Alistair asked. Morrigan gave a short "hmph", and walked back to her tent.
"Soorrrry, didn't mean to interrupt your important...stuff," Alistair called after her. Morrigan snickered. "Is that the best you can do, fool?" she called, but kept walking.
"Oh, we were just enjoying the show, don't mind us, my dear Alistair," Zevran said.
"The show? What show?" he asked, then flushed as he realized that Zevran was looking him up and down.
"Yes, that show, my dear Alistair. And now that I have had my show, I will go get some mending done while our supper is cooking," Zevran said.
"You are rather impressive, Dear," Wynne mildly said, then chuckled as Alistair blushed even redder.
"Oh dear, we've embarrassed him. You are adorable when you blush, Alistair. Come, Wynne, let's go back to gathering and leave the poor man in peace," Leliana said.
"Perhaps that's best. He might burst a blood vessel if he blushes much harder," Wynne said. She stood and patted Alistair's forearm, then walked off, making a noise that sounded suspiciously like a giggle.
"I'm really sorry. It was just...and you looked so...and then you took off your shirt….I couldn't look away," Solona said, looking down at her hands. She was sure she was as red as he was.
Alistair watched her for a moment, an odd smile on his face. "Well...I'm glad you got some entertainment out of it," he finally said as he sat next to her. "I didn't think you were interested, though," he added.
Solona sighed. "It's not that I'm not interested. Just not sure it's a good idea. I'm a mage, and you're a prince, and it can't go anywhere," she said.
"We could all be dead tomorrow, you know," Alistair said, "and the prince thing? I think it would be a warm day in the Frostbacks before I took the throne, at least if Anora has anything to say about it, not to mention Loghain."
"But…"
"Just think about it. I'm not going anywhere," Alistair said. "Well, except to the stream to wash off," he said, then suited action to words.
Solona watched him go and sighed. She wanted...oh, she wanted to touch that wonderful golden skin. He was right. They could all be dead tomorrow. But it would hurt so much when she had to give him up. She bit her lip and sighed.
"Go, my dear Warden. I will watch the stew," Zevran said. His tent wasn't far, so he'd probably heard it all.
"You heard that?"
"Of course. I know all and see all. Besides, it's obvious the two of you are pining for each other. Go. I'll keep the others from going to the stream. Or possibly I will charge admission," Zevran said, which made Solona blush and smile.
"Ah there it is. Do that to him and he won't be able to resist you. I shall somehow try to go on, despite the fact that you do not do that to me."
"Oh you are incorrigible. I shouldn't...oh, sod it!" Solona said, and hurried towards the stream. If she was hurt, so be it.