Yo waz up guys?! Ok ok, I'll type normal… (Sniff sniff)
Disclaimer: I do not own Death Note. I do not own Near or Mello (You cannot believe how much I want Mello though…) I own the teachers and "a girl" (Linda?) that Near mentions in this fic though.
Enjoy and REVIEW :P Tell me if it sucks or not, 'cause seriously, I never wrote in Near's point of view before.
"Near."
"Mello."
"That kid with the white hair."
"That kid that eats chocolate."
"Why does he twirl his hair?"
"Why does he get angry all the time?"
"I hear he killed his own parents."
"I hear his parents abandoned him."
"Haha, look! He got first place again!"
"And that stupid blonde got second place – again!"
Shut up.
I wanted to scream at them. It is none of their business what we are like and where we came from. Mello and I. Sometimes I hear those children's voices in my head while I take a test, and I write the wrong answer on the line on purpose so that they can be quiet.
And I still got First Place. I failed.
The Wammy's House. That's where we all lived. We ate, slept there, took classes… Watari recruited us from everywhere. All over the world. We were all happy there, I suppose. "Everyone here is like frenemies," A girl once told me. Friends mixed with Enemies. She was right. Everyone gossiped about each other.
No, my parents did not abandon me. I tell myself that every time I hear someone talking about my past, but I know it's true. That Mello probably went into the files and shared my file with everyone else.
Mello. He liked to prank me and spread rumors about me. Stick and stones can break my bones, but words will never hurt me. I heard that on a Television show once, when I was in earshot of it. That phrase seemed so doubtful though. They can't just pretend that this feeling that I feel every night in my chest isn't pain. But words will never hurt me. Mello's words hurt more than any other physical pain.
"That idiot. Why does he play with toys all day? What a baby!"
Why do you talk about me like this, Mello? I don't talk about you. "He's jealous, it's so obvious." I hear one of my teachers say. Jealous? Why would he be jealous of me?
But I'm jealous at you. I'm supposed to be jealous of you, not you being jealous of me. I have a valid reason for being jealous of you, Mello. Can't you see that? You're so good at conversing with everybody, always a leader… I'll never be like that. I'm jealous that you can smile even though you're an orphan. Can't you see that? I get good grades. That's not a good reason to be jealous of me, Mello.
It was winter.
"Aw professor, please? We want to go outside!" The kids were begging the teacher to let them play in the fluffy white snow. Finally the teacher let them. With a loud "WHOOPIE!" the children ran outside quickly while the teacher held the door open for them.
Mello was going outside too, when one of the teachers stopped him. "No Mello." He said. "You have to stay inside since you took Matt's Game Boy and threw it in the lake yesterday."
"Aw come ON!" Mello looked outside with longing. "We always joke around, professor! It's just a joke, really! Matt wasn't even crying! It's just a joke…"
But the teacher shook his head and closed the front door shut. He turned to me. "Near, would you like to go outside? You will get fresh air…"
"No thank you." I said. The teacher sighed and left to grade a recent algebra test we had.
"Damn fucking two-faced…" Mello was kicking at the marble floors, cursing the teacher. It's times like these where I wonder where he learned these horrible words. "I hear his father abused him, and one day he just got sick and tired of it and…" One student in Mello's class said once. Was this true? Maybe his father cursed a lot while he…? Did Mello ever denied these rumors, though, like I did? Or, deep inside his heart like mine, did he know it was true?
"Hey, you." Mello took notice that I was in the front hall. I was sitting on the floor, screwing together a car with multiple plastic pieces.
Oh… I know what's going to happen. Mello's going to come over and start to abuse me verbally. It's a favorite hobby of his. I heard his footsteps coming closer and closer to me already.
Then Mello slipped.
Some of the snow must have come in as the rowdy children pushed themselves outside. "The fuck---!" I heard Mello fall with a loud Whack!
That must have hurt. I turned my head and looked at him. My empathy levels haven't completely run out, as I found out.
"Are you alright?"
"Shut up!" Mello responded.
I sighed and returned to making a model car. I needed to put the wheels on and the taillights. Mello rubbed the back of his head, not getting up from the floor.
Then he bursted in tears. What…? I turned around quickly to see if what I heard was true.
He was crying. Oh no…. I never seen anybody cry before, except that once in a while tantrum from one of Wammy's House's younger students.
What do I do? Was my first thought. Should I tell the teacher? No, that would probably make Mello angrier. Should I go and hug him, like I've seen the teachers hug the young ones? No, I want to live a little more, so that's out of the question. What do I do? I never cried before, so I don't know what I would have wanted someone to do if I was crying.
"Mello…" I started to crawl over to him. He inched away from me. "No, no, don't you touch me, Near, god damn you, I hate it when people try to comfort me when I'm hurt…" Mello rubbed at his eyes with his sleeve, his voice muffled.
"Mello." I said it more firmly, to get his attention and to assure myself that I won't get killed right now, Mello will not tease me right now, and he is vulnerable…
"Near, I told you to stay away from me! Just because you get the highest grades and you're a freaking saint at this school doesn't mean…" Mello trailed off, choking on his tears.
"I'm not a saint, Mello."
"I didn't mean that seriously! God, stop with that blank face of yours, it's annoying me…!" Mello backed away from me more, his knees pulled up to his chest.
"Mello, I just want to know why you are crying." When I said this, Mello started crying more. Sometimes I think Mello is an emotional wreck, like a toy roller coaster I once had that fell apart.
Mello glared at me with those dead eyes with no color in them. "They look just like L," a teacher said of us. L? What did L look like? The greatest detective in the world, dummy Mello screamed at me once when I let my thoughts come out of my mouth.
"I-It's none of your business…!" Mello turned his back toward me, still drying his tears.
I know, I know. He could be crying because he fell. After all, falling headfirst onto marble floors qualifies for medical attention if you hit your head hard enough. But Mello wasn't bleeding. "I never get hurt, fools!"Mello told his other friends last summer when he almost got a fatal injury after jumping into the rocky part of the lake. "You will someday, and you will get a huge scar, mark my words Mello!" a nervous female teacher responded. But Mello just laughed.
He wasn't laughing now. It couldn't be his bump on the back of his head that's making him cry. It's something else…
I couldn't take it any more and hugged Mello. "What the hell..?!" Mello tried to shake me off gently, weakened by his heightened sadness and surprise. "Don't cry, Mello." I said to him.
"Ok, Ok, just get the hell off me!" Mello was back to normal now. I let go of him before he killed me and retreated back to my model car. He looked at me with his what -the- hell -is- wrong- with -the- albino- idiot- this- time look.
"I hate you, Near," He finally spat out.
"I hate you too, Mello." I sighed.
"Then why don't you show it?"
"What do you mean?"
"You never shout at me, you never hit me… What is wrong with you? You're so emotionless…"
"Showing emotion is useless, a waste of time, troublesome. They can also get in the way of things."
""You making up that theory is a waste of time."
"You teasing me is a waste of time."
"Shut up."
I had to smile.
"I bet I got a higher grade than you on that algebra test!"
"We all know who's getting the top spot again, Mello..." I had to acknowledge my genius.
"Yeah- me!'
Was it that day that our official rivalry began? All of a sudden, I wasn't jealous of Mello anymore. He still was jealous of me, but he was better at hiding it. Ever since that day where he starting sobbing and I hugged him- that was merely a memory now. There was a good chance that Mello suppressed that incident, and in truth, I did too.
Memories are best left forgotten. Not lost, as some memories disappear completely from some people's minds, but forgotten.
But why did Mello cry…? If I could ask him that, I would.
I seriously would.
A/N: it's short on purpose. It's supposed to symbolize that Near has forgotten parts of his childhood at Wammy's House out of fear that he'll feel sorry for himself and Mello. It's also short because I suck at writing Near… He's too hard to relate with.
But Mello, now, I can understand him. I would burst into tears too if I was him. Mello was crying because he was annoyed that Near didn't show any reaction to his trip and that made him feel rejected. Idk, that's my theory, since I would cry too if I slipped and Near just turned around and looked at me with cold eyes. But yet Mello didn't want Near to touch him because he hates the new, unfamiliar feeling that people want to take care of him. Again, I would push Near away too if I was Mello.
Thanks for reading :) I would love it if you reviewed…
