What could have been going through Alec's head during the wedding scene. The parts that are like this are Alec's thoughts

Alec's POV

*Magnus enters the wedding*

Magnus,he's here?

"Maryes this is between me and your son, I'll leave if he asks me to" Magnus said confidently. But i could tell there was worry in his voice. This is my chance, I can stop this, I can be with Magnus...

"Alec?" Lydia said. Crap, how long have i been staring at him studying his expression, the way he is gently shaking... Say something, stop staring at him. I turned to look at Lydia.

"I... I can't breath" Really that's the best I can come up with...

"I know, it's okay" Lydia said trying to reassure me. I can't do this. Magnus's voice has continued to echo through my head since he said it "I know you feel what i feel Alec..."

Why had i been so harsh with him, all he had done was care for me and tell me to stop lying to myself.

"I can't do this, I thought we were doing the right thing, but this, this isn't it" That is the first smart thing i have said all month.

"You don't have to explain" Lydia said. What do I say now?

"Lydia, I'm sorry.."

"You deserve to be happy, it's okay, I'll be fine." Lydia said.

What do I do now, I'll turn and look at magnus. I studied the look on his face, he looked scared, for the first time since i meet Magnus he has ever looked scared. Wait I'm staring again. Just walk down the steps. Wait is this the right move. This isn't what my parents would want. No, they cant control me any more, it's finally my turn to get what i want. All i need to do is walk over to Magnus and take him to a separate room and talk to him.

"Alec what are you doing..." My Mother said

"Enough" I said over her voice

Everything started to slow. As i got closer to Magnus my heart beat faster and it became harder and harder to breath. Everything he said was right, I can't lie anymore. I need to show them here and now who I really am, I need to tell them all the truth. I grabbed his coat and brought him towards me as quickly as possible. It felt like time came to a stop as we kissed nothing else mattered. When I pulled away for air Magnus looked so scared, like he thought i had changed my mind. I leaned in to kiss him again.

This is it, this is all that I need. All I need is Magnus, as long as he is here with me, it will all be fine