AN: I'm not really sure about that one. Someone more talented at writing than I am could make a great story out of that idea. I can only manage short scenes at best. If anyone wants to make more of it, tell me where to find it if you do so.
Fourteen year old Tony was miserable. It had been raining for a few days, so every sleeping place he had was wet. To top things off, he hadn't been able to scrounge up any money for almost as long, so he was even more hungry than usual. He didn't like picking pockets, but it was better than shoplifting.
Tony had been observing a very well dressed gentleman for a few minutes. He thought that he had found out where the man kept his wallet. Even if he didn't resort to it often, Tony was an excellent pickpocket. That was why Tony was very surprised when a hand clamped around his wrist just as he was pulling out the wallet. Tony swallowed nervously.
"Are you part of a gang, kid?" Of all questions, Tony hadn't expected that one.
"No, sir! I'm not suicidal." Tony decided to be as honest as possible.
"Smart move. Why did you pick me?" Tony thought that that was a very stupid question.
"You look rich." The man chuckled at his answer.
"I guess I do. You seem to be a smart kid. How would you like a permanent place to live and an education?" Tony studied the man very hard. He didn't look like a pervert, but one couldn't really tell by looks alone.
"I would start by asking what the catch is." That earned him a look of approval.
"Very good. As payment, you would have to work for me." As a drug mule, most likely, Tony thought.
"What kind of work?" Tony asked.
"Espionage."
As it turned out, the day Tony met Michael Archangel was the best day in his life.
Tony, currently known as Anthony DiNozzo of Baltimore PD, was dead tired. He had been sent here to find a rather large source of illegal small arms. As it turned out, the local Mafia was in on it. Tony even had been sent under cover. An under cover operative sent under cover again. It was enough to break anyone's head. Just as he was supposed to go home, they had caught a case and he really couldn't go, especially when the feds got involved. And what feds they were! NCIS! Navy Cops. From the looks of it they had sent the most difficult to work with bastard in their ranks. At least he was competent. But now the case was over, and he could finally go home!
Someone started pounding on his door. Tony hurried to open it before it was beaten in. On the other side was the Navy cop.
"What do you want?" Tony asked tiredly.
"Just found out that you don't have a job any more." That was only technically true.
"Why do you care?" He'd rather not have the attention of the feds.
"I have an opening on my team." Archangel would want to know about that.
Tony was furious. The Secret Service had really dropped the ball this time. All journalists have been vetted for years, they said. There aren't any terrorists on board, they said. The idiots nearly lost the president. Dilettantes.
Anthony DiNozzo liked Kate. Tony didn't. Smug, oh so smart goody two shoes. Tony could think circles around her. And she wasn't as great a profiler as she thought she was. Profiling was overrated anyway. Most of the time, the perpetrator was nothing like the profile. Grabbing a profile out of a bag blindfolded would be as effective.
That was not how one disposed of a body! Acid. Amateurs. Just as well Kate went on the sub with Gibbs. Tony was a pilot, he needed the open sky. Being stuck in a tin can was not his idea of fun. To top it all off, there was another would be genius kissing up to Gibbs. Tony would bet his NCIS salary that he would be on the team in a few months.
What a wimp. She had a perfectly good stab at the infiltrator, but she didn't. Because he had kind eyes. Now Gerald would be out for a long time and they all had to get used to that terribly shy and awkward new kid. At least he had an identity for the shooter. Ari Haswari. Supposedly a Mossad plant in AlQuaeda. Digging deeper revealed that he had switched sides. Gibbs would never catch that particular white wale. Archangel would see to that.
Gibbs had actually managed to identify Ari. With McGee's help. Say hello to the new team member. Anthony DiNozzo would make life hell for him. Tony didn't really mind him, even if he was a bit timid and spineless.
Bah, McGee was supposed to be smart? They had taken ages to hack into the tap the captain had installed. Tony could have done that in five minutes. And told them from the start that it was an inside job. Tony understood the desire for money, having had to live without for too long. But giving up ones own family? His own father had done just that, but he was a junkie. That man had had it all. Sometimes Tony didn't understand people.
Come on, crop circles? Tony could tell at once that the one the chopper was in had been caused by the down draft. The rest had been made as a cover up. As much as he liked Abby, her believe in the supernatural was trying sometimes. The actual story behind the crop circles left Romeo and Juliet gaping in the dust.
There was a reason Tony mistrusted morticians. And taxidermists. That much fascination with the dead had to be unhealthy. And poor Ducky had almost been pickled alive. A rather unpleasant death. They had been just in time.
Tony really didn't like the CIA. They were amateurs and morally corrupt. The Firm would never back a paedophile. At least Archangel's section wouldn't. Luckily they had responded to threats. If Tony ever had to go back to South America, it would be too soon.
Good grief, but McGee was terribly green. One just doesn't open a letter if one doesn't know the sender! It had been extremely lucky that Tony had intercepted the letter and remarked that it felt strange. The specialists had opened it and found some white powder inside. It had been identified as Y. Pestis. Not a very nice disease. The sender had been a deranged biochemist who wanted revenge for the imagined rape of her daughter. The daughter had made the whole thing up to cover up an embarrassing situation.
At the Navy Yard, a major cat fight was brewing. Mossad had sent a liaison officer to keep them from killing Ari, who they had lost contact with. Tony knew that Ari was dead already. Their new director, some woman called Shepard, also didn't want them to kill Ari. On top of all that they had to stop a terrorist attack. Piece of cake. Not.
So, Ziva was here to stay. Kate didn't like her. At all. The way those two were bickering was amazing. And Tony there in the middle to fan the flames. If it weren't so damn annoying most of the time, it would have been fun.
Tony hadn't liked Ziva before. Now he actually disliked her. She had invited the whole team for dinner. Except him. Anthony DiNozzo was very upset about this. Tony thought that this kind of behaviour was very childish and immature. On top of that, Ziva wasn't even half as good an investigator and interrogator as she thought she was.
Tony couldn't believe the man! First he left and stuck Tony with the position of Team Leader, then he came back and expected everything to go back the way things were. And to put the cherry on top, the director had sent him undercover, to sniff out the arms dealer La Grenouille. Another white wale. Then she went and offered him the Rota position. Which he declined, of course. He was supposed to gather intelligence in DC, not some backwater in Spain.
Going undercover while already undercover added a whole new level of confusion to the experience. Without contact to his handler at the Firm, Tony would have been completely lost. The situation with Jeanne and La Grenouille had turned out to be a complete disaster. Tony could have told that from the start.
Now he was accused of murder. Again. He didn't commit that one, either. As far as he knew, the director had killed La Grenouille.
Who ever had thought giving the director a wet works mission in her early days at NCIS had been an idiot. She hadn't been able to go through with the mission and left her mark alive. Which had killed her. Tony and Ziva got the blame for that. The new director seemed to think it was all their fault, at least. He broke up the team and Tony got assigned to a ship. He would vanish in transit. It was way past time he went home.