AN : Yeah my first DW thing in a while and it's total crack. Sorry but I've gotten to the stage in the newer series of the show that I've begun to roll my eyes whenever they say 'darkest day' or 'final day' or final hour or the Doctor will die blahblahblah, Moffat needs to think of some new stuff let's be real. Also warning: you may not find this as funny as intended if you don't share my humour.
The Doctor's Final Day (no, this time we mean it!)
The twelfth Doctor stepped out of the Tardis and eyed his surroundings warily. He had got an emergency message through his psychic paper and had opted out of bringing Clara along for this particular adventure. He didn't want to put her in unnecessary danger despite what she would say. He looked around at the dark planet he had arrived on and found it hard to see anything through the thick mist that filled the atmosphere. He squinted and could just about make out a hooded figure approaching. "Whose there? Are you the one who summoned me here?" He demanded, his accent broad and rough. "Show yourself".
The figure appeared in front of him from through the mist and dropped the hood of its black cloak. His breath left his body in a whoosh at the sight of the woman in front of him. Her thick blonde hair and bold jawline was unmistakable to him as were her cinnamon brown eyes. She smiled at him, her tongue poking out through the edge of her teeth and it almost did him in. He was frozen in shock for a few moments before his breath returned and he remembered that she couldn't be here. It was impossible. A thousand years had passed for him but he would never forget leaving her behind with his human self.
"Doctor", the voice was posher than he remembered and sultry. This was not Rose Tyler but some poor imitation of his beloved former companion. He felt himself scowl with irritation at this obvious show of trickery. "My Doctor. You came when I called".
"Oh I assure you I did not come for you", he said with an angry edge to his voice, his accent thickening on the 'you'. "Despite the ticks you may have used to make you look like my old companion, you are no Rose Tyler. I came for whoever sent for me through my physic paper".
"That was me", the Rose imitator answered huskily. "And very good, Doctor, they did say you were smart, that you would see right through my powers. I guess I should have believed them but that does not matter now. I picked this form because I hoped it would put you at ease for the conversation we are about to have".
"Get to the point, I don't have all century. There is a concert on Filo Ten that I would like to get to at some point and I'm sure my companion would love to see me again before she dies of old age".
"Oh yes, the lovely Clara. It's a good thing that you did not bring her here. I am not sure she would have taken this conversation too well".
The Doctor huffed impatiently at the Rose clone. "What conversation are we supposed to be having exactly?"
"I brought you here because one of my powers is the ability to get random but detailed flashes of a future timeline. Doctor, I must tell you that your day is drawing to a close and soon there will be no protector of the universe anymore. Your day is drawing to an end and you will not cheat death again. Your final day is arriving soon, I'm here to warn you of your impending doom".
"Lovely rhyme, really. That's very poetic", the Doctor scoffed.
Rose (not Rose but that would be a bit of a mouthful to keep calling her that so he'd just call her Rose for now)'s eyes flashed with annoyance. "You do not take my warning seriously. You think me jesting but I am trying to help you. Your final day is fast approaching. You must stay awake and keep alert or the universe will be doomed for destruction".
"My final day you say?" he returned lightly and began to walk around the impersonator (and apparent psychic) casually. "Like I've not heard that one before. Try something a bit more original, would ya?"
"I am serious. Your darkest day is coming, Doctor".
He snorted and rolled his eyes. "Which one is this? The fourth darkest and the third darkest? Oh maybe this is only the fifth darkest. I've had about ten of the darkest days of my life already".
"This one will be the darkest without question. You will die" she predicted grimly which sounded strange coming from Rose's face and voice.
He smirked at her mockingly. "I die every week before lunch, am I supposed to be shocked by this?"
"If you do not heed my warning time lord, terrible things will happen! You will see!" the fake Rose shrieked before disappearing in a cloud of smoke. His nose turned up in disdain (he really hated the dramatics) before he got back into his ship.
A week later, he found himself fighting off Daleks, Davros, Missy, Cybermen and a hoard of giant monstrous looking bee-horse hybrids with the help of only Clara and his Tardis. When the day was done, the Doctor may have ended up decapitated but it turned out alright because he had Clara easily manage to reattach his head to his body without a problem. There were a few more attempts on his life and one that ended in his actual death but Clara resuscitated him. Obviously the fake Rose hadn't bothered to look further than the moment he fell onto the floor of his Tardis and had assumed he was really dead.
Honestly, didn't anyone realise by now that he was next to impossible to get rid of? After all he was the main character in the show.