Author's Notes: I recorded Big Time Rush today, saw it twice. I listened to the song at the end about twenty times, tried to recreate the flip thing that Logan does with my younger sisters.

I cannot wait for this show to come on again. I adore it.

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"I've done enough now,
to know that beautiful things
don't always stay that way.
I've done enough now,
to know this beautiful place
isn't everything they say"

- "The River,"
by Good Charlotte

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It doesn't really shock James that Kendall is the one who gets it to the big time, gets to see the lights and the glitz and the glamour.

They all have their place in the friendship, and Kendall is the fierce, dedicated one. He's the one who comes up with the plans, outlines everything on blue paper with black marker set in stone, and they all follow.

That's how it's always been, Kendall, James, Carlos, Logan. It's just the four of them, always taking Kendall's lead.

KendallJamesCarlosLogan.

Kendall is the fierce leader of the group. He can do anything he wants without barely trying, never spending too much time on something before bam! he has it down.

Logan is the genius, the one who always has everything recorded in his mind and stores them in neat little filing cabinets in his brain. Logic is his favorite word, because it makes everything make sense, it allows no room for error. It's perfect.

Carlos is the goofball of the group, the loud, sweet, slightly messed up in-the-head one who makes everyone smile and laugh. He's the one, with that stupid helmet of his, that brightens everyone's day.

And him? Well, he's the conceited good looking one.

With long brown hair, white teeth, and a baby doll face, he knows that he can make girls swoon easily. (Well, except for the Jennifers, but he's still working on that one.)

That's probably why he hangs out with his best friends, just the four of them, KendallJamesCarlosLogan. They were the ones who hung out with him when he was just the new, nerdy kid in Minnesota. They stuck by his side, even when he was still awkward and trying to grow into his new skin, all long limbs and massive height.

But now, well, now he's model material. He could hang out with the popular group, the jocks, join the baseball team if he wanted. He could get a cheerleader girlfriend, win prom king.

But he really doesn't want that. Because sometimes when he looks in the mirror, he hates that face, all long hair, somewhat flawless skin, and baby doll good looks.

He just wants to be known for something other than his looks. Like humor for Carlos, brains for Logan, dedication for Kendall.

But no, he has his face and his body and eh, sometimes he hates it.

But really, what can he do?

He knows that sometimes, beautiful things don't always stay that way, and that scares him. If something happens to his face, what will he have left? Nothing.

He tries the word out on his tongue, weighs it in his mouth. He doesn't like it.

But when he joins along with his gang to LA, he changes his mind.

Compared to all these people, he just looks normal. No more model material, no more baby doll face, blinding smile. All these models and actors and singers have that too. Except, y'know, it's all fake, but that's besides the point. He doesn't really have that to himself anymore.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Logan asks, draping his arm over his shoulder.

James shrugs it off, giving him that million dollar smile of his, tears his face away from the people walking around in the airport. "Nothing," he says, chewing on his lip, "just thinking."

He looks over, sees Kendall and Carlos, with his helmet on, of course, listening to an iPod and singing the Spice Girls at the top of their lungs, and smiles. He wouldn't trade these people for the world, even if they are getting weird looks and embarrassing him.

"You okay?" Logan asks with concerned eyes.

"Yeah," he says, his hoarse voice, and smiles. He forgot that this is all that Logan has right here, not much else going for him, besides the brains. These three boys, him and the two idiots who are now doing an odd version of the butt dance that he made famous, are the entire world for him.

It might just be for him, too.

"Sometimes, I think I need to get new friends," Logan says, but he's got a smile in his voice and his face that lets James know that he wouldn't give them up for the world. He wouldn't either.

"Hey, can I ask you something?" James asks, feeling a little awkward, just like when he was growing into his too-large for him body.

"Shoot," Logan says, leaning back in his chair. His eyes are on Carlos and Kendall, who is now doing the worm on the floor as Carlos starts wailing the song 'I'm Too Sexy' by Right Said Fred. "He really can't sing."

James laughs, tucks his hair behind his ear. "Yeah." Pause. "What is there to me, besides my looks?"Logan just kind of looks at him like he doesn't know what has got into him, and honestly, he doesn't either. He ignores the urge to look down, focuses his eyes on Logan's dark hair that is slightly sticking up in the front.

"Well," he says, drawing the word out, and James's heart tumbles to his stomach. "You're funny, can dance, think of some awesome pranks, and play some mean hockey. Oh, and you make the most awesome brownies ever."

James laughs, lets the words hang in the air for a moment.

"Hey, what's up with the sudden low self-esteem? That doesn't seem like you."

He bites down on his lower lip, thinks about voicing his fears, and decides, why not. I'm in an airport in LA, waiting to get picked up for a record deal, which is my dream come true, and my friends are singing and doing the running man, what do I have to lose? he thinks.

"It's just…" he sighs, frustrated that he can't get the words out. "I'm just kind of the one known for my looks, y'know? And now, everyone looks like me, all the plastic surgery and stuff. You guys all have something for you, y'know.""Like what?" Logan asks quietly.

"Well, you're the genius, Carlos is the comedian, and Kendall is like the leader. I guess I don't have anything going for me anymore."It's silent before Logan says, "You still look better than half of the people here, and yours are all real."James snorts. "That's the gayest thing I've heard in a while."Logan rolls his eyes and punches James in the arm. "Hey, you're the one who brought this crap up."

"Oh, I know you just didn't hit me."

Logan hits him again, and James tackles him to the ground. They roll around for a minute, laughing, before Carlos comes over, yells "Dog pile!" and joins them.

Kendall stands up, from where he was doing some sort of break dancing looking thing, and sits on top of James stomach. He lets some not appropriate words fly out of his mouth and then security comes and tells them to break it up.

"Hey, guys, get us in trouble," Carlos says, frowning.

James laughs. "You were the one wailing at the top of the world, saying that you were too sexy for your shirt, which your not."

Carlos straps his helmet on and rams towards his stomach. James moves and he crashes to the ground.

Someone comes over, a dark skinned lady, and announces that they're limo is here.

James slings his arms over his best friends shoulders, leans his head against Kendall's shoulder. "I love you guys, really. And I mean that in the most non-gay way possible." His friends laughter follows him out to the sun, LA heat. The world is for their taking, and James is going to make sure that they make the best of this.

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