Encoded
The Morality Core was supposed to be the savior of Aperture. When the Genetic Lifeform and Disk Operating System continued to try to kill the employees, more cores were proposed. Soon everyone was designing and programming cores: Cores to inhibit, cores to redirect, cores to focus, cores to distract, cores to enhance. More intelligent cores. The Morality Core was reprogrammed and others were switched on and off to see what worked.
They were throwing science at the wall, but eventually something would have to stick.
Aperture was leaking money like a cup made of Swiss cheese, though, so each core had to be put through extensive testing, tweaked and adjusted until it was just right. And still no core had done the job it was intended for, which was harnessing that wild, raw power with a violent temper and a strong will.
Eventually the production of new cores had been cut off. There was already a room filled with shelves of the things, and the decision had to be made to just improve on what they already had. Each core had its own port, labeled with a serial number and description. From the ports the cores could recharge and access a limited amount of data. There was a communication system that had been planned between them, but with all the budget cuts, that was one of the first projects on the chopping block. After all, the cores could talk. What Aperture needed was to focus on what was NECESSARY. The Intelligence Core had found it before long, and shared the knowledge with a few others. It still wasn't used often, though.
Most of the cores tended to be talkative, often trying to one-up each other. Confidence was a necessity against the central core.
Along one of the top shelves, the green Adventure Sphere spent most of his time watching the shelf across the aisle. It was packed with some of the prettiest lady-cores in the place. Some dainty and delicate, some tough and hardcore… it didn't get much better.
"I got a mighty fine view here, ladies," he'd call out to them. "Ya got some lovely eyes over there. Prettiest I've ever seen. And believe me, I've seen 'em all."
"The Adventure Sphere has only come into contact with 37 female constructs, and 11 female humans."
Rick, as the Adventure Sphere had taken to calling himself, narrowed his shutters. The Fact Sphere was over on that shelf too, right across from him. He thought he was hot shit.
"Yeah, well that's better'n YOU, four-eyes! No girl'd wanna look yer way."
The pink core drew its handles up. "The Fact Sphere is the most handsome sphere."
"Doubt it. How 'bout we ask these gorgeous spheres over here. Whaddaya think, ladies?"
"Well NEITHER of you's managed to be much good on the central core," one said with a sharp voice. The others laughed.
"I'm just savin' my strength. Gonna get in top form, then POW!" Rick rocked on his port. "She won't know what hit her! And after that, she'll NEVER want me off 'a her. Once you've had Rick, ya never want anyone else."
"The Adventure Sphere is a blowhard."
"You better just WATCH it, bub! I'll come over there an' CREAM yer sorry ass!"
"The Adventure Sphere's attempts are destined to fail."
"THAT'S IT, COME ON!" The Adventure Sphere rocked and raged on his port.
"Watch it!" the red Emotion core snarled next to him, spinning around.
"Goddamn Fact Sphere, he thinks he's tough shit, he's just a WIMP!"
"The Fact Sphere is superior to all other spheres."
"Yer full 'a yerself!"
It usually went on like this, and the other cores generally didn't get involved because they had more important matters to attend to, and because neither the Adventure Sphere nor the Fact Sphere listened to others much anyway.
Whenever a scientist came in to take a core for program adjustments, or for trials, the room generally quieted down, though. Not out of respect. Not quite out of fear, though they had all seen cores leave, and return a few days later with completely different personalities and no memory of their former selves. Just in anticipation.
One day the Adventure Sphere was coming back from a long trial. It was his favorite kind: a simulation. Like playing a first-person video game. It had started well, with him meeting or exceeding every expectation. Towards the end, though, the scientists had pushed up the difficulty level about five notches, and suddenly he was surrounded by faceless men with Black Mesa emblems on their uniforms, and he had all these options he'd never seen before that he didn't know how to work. He'd grabbed something that looked like a gun at random, but it turned out to be a flame thrower… which was pretty damn awesome, until they hit him with a fire hose that broke the flamethrower. His virtual hands had groped around for something else and he had grabbed a grenade and pulled the pin and thrown it – but then it bounced back at him and exploded right in his face.
Cores didn't feel pain in the same way a human would. But the simulation installed in each of them was pretty close.
"That's a shame," said the man. Rick was still in a bit of a daze, but he was alert enough to be SO GLAD they weren't in the cores' room yet. A comment like that could destroy his reputation.
Not that the scientists talked much in there. Rick had heard them talking in the lab. It gave a lot of them the willies.
But then they were a bunch of pussies, every core knew that.
Rick was lifted onto his port, and he settled there, top shutter drooping a bit. "Whew," he sighed. "What a rush. I tell ya."
The scientist checked a few boxes on his clipboard, then turned and looked up at the Fact Sphere. He began to jot down some notes.
Rick's upper shutter rose. He rocked back and forth, trying to catch the other core's eye, to no avail.
"The Fact Sphere will pass every test and meet every challenge successfully."
He wasn't going to shout out like an idiot. Instead, Rick reached down to the little string of code, like a thread connecting his port to others. He sent a quick message in binary.
ATTN: ASAPC FACT 3181970c: Good luck.
The Fact Sphere suddenly looked up. His optic spun a few degrees to the right, then it contracted and focused on the Adventure Sphere. Before he could respond, though, he was plucked off the port and carried out.
Rick spent the next few hours recharging and buttering up the ladies. The rose-colored core designed for hesitation would often give him a second glance. She was cute.
When the Fact Core was returned, his shutters were narrowed almost shut. Adventure eyed him, but kept up his stream of flattery.
"…An' your gorgeous pink? That'd look real nice with my green. We'd make a good pair, admit it!"
The Adventure Sphere kept trying, though it was beginning to seem like a losing battle.
A few days of flirting, banter, and loud arguing later, a scientist came in to take him out for some adjustments. Just before he was lifted from the port, he received a message.
ATTN: ASAPC ADVENTURE 1893110r: Be careful.
Rick's optic contracted. It immediately went to the Fact Sphere, who was looking back at him. But that wasn't a fact.
Rick's processors were still whirring loudly when he came back a while later, and he sagged on his port to recharge and get himself together while the scientist made a few notes and took down the Emotion Sphere next.
"The Fact Sphere is the most intelligent sphere," the core across the aisle was preening. "The Fact Sphere is incredibly handsome."
Rick eyed the other core quietly as his CPU calmed down. "…Ah, shut up," he finally called over.
The pink optic focused on him. "…The Fact Sphere is always right."
"Nobody cares."
"The Fact Sphere is a good sphere, with many friends."
"Oh yeah? Name one. Name one other core or human that gives a damn."
ATTN: ASAPC FACT 3181970c: I thought you could only say facts.
The Fact Sphere's shutters narrowed.
"Ya can't, because nobody cares. Ha."
"…The Fact Sphere is 12.6% more popular than the Adventure Sphere."
ATTN: ASAPC ADVENTURE 1893110r: Aloud, yes. I can speak as I please this way.
"Yeah? We'll see about that. Hey, ladies!" Rick called over. "Yer all looking gorgeous today! Say, who'd ya rather get some alone time with, me or that blabbermouth over there?"
A few cores looked over, but most of them ignored him.
"C'mon now, we gotta settle this. Hey Hesi, yer on my side, ain't ya? Pretty little thing?"
The rose-colored core glanced up. "…I don't know," she said uncertainly.
"You know you want me. Don't be shy." Rick turned back to Fact. "…Anyway, Emotion's a friend 'a mine. He'd tell ya if he were here."
"The Adventure Sphere lies 64.29% of the time."
"Yer makin' that up."
"The Fact Sphere never lies."
"Oh yeah? Gonna have a hard time with the Central Core if ya don't."
"Nnn…. The Adventure Sphere is mistaken."
The next time the Fact Sphere was taken off his port, Rick wasn't fast enough with the message he sent. He grumbled to himself. When Fact was returned, he had a message waiting for him on the port.
ATTN: ASAPC FACT 3181970c: New simulation today, watch out.
His optic rolled in annoyance, but another message ran along the connection soon after.
ATTN: ASAPC FACT 3181970c: You okay?
Rick watched the Fact Sphere out of the corner of his eye. It took a while, but at last a message came his way.
ATTN: ASAPC ADVENTURE 1893110r: It wasn't too bad. I'm fine. I appreciate your concern.
They weren't quite looking at each other, but the Adventure Sphere's lower shutter rose in a smile. Slowly, the Fact Sphere did the same.
Every time one of them left, the other would send a brief message.
ATTN: ASAPC FACT 3181970c: This'll be easy for you.
ATTN: ASAPC FACT 3181970c: No problem, you've got this.
ATTN: ASAPC FACT 3181970c: You'll destroy these tests faster than they can make them.
…
ATTN: ASAPC ADVENTURE 1893110r: This should be no challenge to an adventurer.
ATTN: ASAPC ADVENTURE 1893110r: You're very skilled at these.
ATTN: ASAPC ADVENTURE 1893110r: Your performance seems impressive, though you're still a blowhard.
...
ATTN: ASAPC FACT 3181970c: Hope this doesn't take too long, I like seeing you there.
Even as he sent it, Rick was a trifle uncertain. But the sphere across the way smiled.
ATTN: ASAPC ADVENTURE 1893110r: I like seeing you too.
Then he was taken away, but Rick held onto the message, letting it run through his consciousness in a loop.
Still, when they spoke aloud, it was only to brag, or toss insults back and forth.
"You're ALWAYS yelling at that stupid Fact Sphere," the Emotion Sphere growled one day. "Almost more than you bother the female spheres!"
"He ain't – Hey, he gives just as much as he gets! An' they never ANSWER me! It's damn annoyin'!"
One day when Rick was brought back, he snapped at any sphere that made a sound.
"Can't everybody just shut UP fer a change?" he snarled. "Settle the fuck down, Emotion! An' nobody GIVES a fuck about yer facts! An' I C'N HEAR YA ALL THE WAY ACROSS THE ROOM, DUMMY, GIVE IT A REST!"
The room went silent for a second before the laughing and murmuring started.
ATTN: ASAPC ADVENTURE 1893110r: What's wrong?
Rick growled quietly and let loose a tirade.
ATTN: ASAPC FACT 3181970c: I don't know what the hell they did, but everything's too loud. It's like every sound's pounding me with a hammer. It hurts. Then they tested me and acted like I should've done better. I did a damn good job with all those pansy-ass tests they made! And what fucking good is it gonna do to test this shit? They're not learning anything. It's not helping me. They're just screwing with me. I hate this goddamn hell-hole, and I'm not playing their games anymore.
The Fact Sphere watched him silently as he read the message. For a moment he was motionless.
ATTN: ASAPC ADVENTURE 1893110r: I'm sorry. I wish there was something I could do.
Rick looked back at him, shutters narrowed against the buzz of conversations around him. The Fact Sphere didn't speak, except when a core behind him shrieked with laughter.
"Spheres that insist on making such a level of noise are VASTLY inferior to spheres that do not," he hissed.
ATTN: ASAPC FACT 3181970c: Thanks.
A couple of hours later, Rick was taken out again. He received a message just before he was unplugged.
ATTN: ASAPC ADVENTURE 1893110r: Come back safely.
He clutched this message with every ounce of his energy.
When he returned, the Fact Sphere was peering over at him.
ATTN: ASAPC ADVENTURE 1893110r: Are you all right?
Rick looked up, shutters sagging a bit.
ATTN: ASAPC FACT 3181970c: Just tired. They never let up. But the noise thing is better.
ATTN: ASAPC ADVENTURE 1893110r: I'm glad. Recharge now.
It was brief, but the message just FELT like the Fact Sphere somehow. It would have been recognizable from any port. Rick couldn't help his lower shutter rising as he fell into a state of deep recharge.
When he was fully recharged, Rick could feel the energy surging through him again. He rocked on his port and jabbed his handles as if punching the air.
"You're embarrassing yourself," Emotion muttered.
"Nope, just you!" Rick said cheerfully. He shot a grin over at the Fact Sphere before launching into a song that didn't really have a tune, and lacked any words.
ATTN: ASAPC ADVENTURE 1893110r: You look like you're feeling better.
ATTN: ASAPC FACT 3181970c: Much better. You look pretty good yourself!
Rick shot Fact a sidelong wink. The Fact Sphere's optic widened.
That night when most of the other cores were quiet, the Fact Sphere felt an incoming message, and snapped to alertness.
ATTN: ASAPC FACT 3181970c: You ever get bored over there?
ATTN: ASAPC ADVENTURE 1893110r: Sometimes.
ATTN: ASAPC FACT 3181970c: Want to know what I want to do?
In the dim light, the pink core paused, then nodded. The green one grinned.
ATTN: ASAPC FACT 3181970c: I want to find a USB cable and slip it right into your port, nice and slow at first, but then just thrust it right into you. Then I want to plug it into me, and it might not fit at first, but then it'll go in nice and easy.
The Fact Sphere's optic was spinning slowly, and began to pulse a little brighter off and on. Rick's optic was very gradually brightening as well.
ATTN: ASAPC FACT 3181970c: Then I want to flood you with so much data you won't know what's you and what's me. It'll twist all around inside you like a virus. It'll hit you so hard it'll hurt, but you'll never want it to stop. And it'll feel like it lasts forever, but when it's over you'll want more.
Fact's pulses of light were becoming longer and stronger now. He trembled a bit on his port. Code was coming back to Rick, but it wasn't words, just segments of binary.
ATTN: ASAPC FACT 3181970c: And I want your data in me, I want it in every circuit. I want to feel nothing but you in me. I want to be so close we can touch, so afterwards we can just sit there against each other. I want to have my handles on yours, and I want you so close all I can see is your optic. That's all I need to see.
ATTN: ASAPC FACT 3181970c: And when it's over you'll feel it for ages, and even when you don't, you'll never forget that feel of me.
The pink sphere glowed brightly, shutters narrowed over a wide optic. The green one's did the same, closely focused on the other core.
ATTN: ASAPC FACT 3181970c: That's what I want to do.
ATTN: ASAPC ADVENTURE 1893110r: I want that. I want that so much.
The next morning Rick grinned across the aisle at the spectrum of spheres.
"Mornin' ladies!" he called over, then focused right on the Fact Sphere, who was eyeing him. "Lookin' good today. Hope yer all recharged, 'cause it looks like a whole lotta Rick comin' up today."
ATTN: ASAPC ADVENTURE 1893110r: You're ridiculous.
The Fact Sphere's optic was glowing a bit brighter than usual, and his lower shutter was just slightly raised. Rick chuckled.
A scientist came in and took down the Fact Sphere later in the morning.
ATTN: ASAPC FACT 3181970c: Knock em dead. See you later.
Rick settled back on his port in satisfaction. After a minute, though, he jumped at an incoming message. His optic rolled around, unsure of the source, but he grabbed onto the stream of code.
ATTN: ASAPC ADVENTURE 1893110r: Keep doing what you're doing.
It wasn't the Fact Sphere. It felt like…
Rick whirled to face the red core on the neighboring port. The Emotion Core was an older model, without shutters to express himself or protect his glass optic lens. He was gazing sidelong at Rick.
ATTN: ASAPC EMOTION 1181130a: What the hell, you creep! How - what did you hear? How long were you listening? Beat it before I beat YOU! I'll kick your ass into next week! Nobody asked you to butt in!
ATTN: ASAPC ADVENTURE 1893110r: Shut up. I didn't hear anything, and I don't know what you're doing, but I feel every damn worry and smile in here, and you and the Fact Sphere are the happiest things around. I don't care what it is, keep doing it.
Rick glared hard at the other core.
ATTN: ASAPC EMOTION 1181130a: Yeah, well I will. You don't have to be weird and talk about it. Creep.
The green core looked away angrily… which pointed him towards the door. The door the Fact Sphere had gone through, which he would come back through before too long.
Screw the Emotion Sphere. Rick would do what he wanted.
And he knew EXACTLY what he wanted.