PWNT.
By two kids on crack
Sasuke: HIIII, Narutoooo!!!
Naruto: Oh, welcome back you Gaylord.
Sasuke: Why, yes! I have become gay!
Naruto: …
Sasuke: I found out that being molested was actually okay when Orochimaru did that to me. He really liked touching my weiner.
Naruto: -gasp- WTF?
Sasuke: This is sort of sudden, Naruto, but…will you marry me? Please say yes because otherwise I'll have to marry that nasty Shino.
Naruto: YES, SASUKE-KUN! I WILL marry you!
Meanwhile, Sakura and Shino were hiding in the bushes.
Shino: Damn it.
Sakura: Man, I can't BELIEVE I used to LIKE that guy, but I'll get him back from Naruto. I'll teach him what happens when he messes with THE big forehead girl! ..I MEAN, HARUNO SAKURA!
Later, Sakura went to visit Ino, the super slut.
Sakura: Hey, Ino, I need your hel-
Ino: Hi Sakura did you know that Sasuke got married? I mean like I totally want to get married to him some other day and put him back in the closet again! I'm going to do that body switch ninjutsu and when Sasuke kisses Naruto, he'll technically be kissing me! Oh, I lov-
Sakura: Bye, Ino.
Iruka-sensei was celebrating Mr. and Mr. Uchiha's wedding.
Iruka: Now, do you, Uchiha Sasuke, take Uzumaki Naruto to be your beloved husband?
Sasuke: BELIEVE IT!
Iruka: Good answer.
Iruka: Uzumaki Naruto you do too right? Yes? Okay. Skip right to the cake!
Every shinobi in Konoha had come to this wedding only for the cake. Except for Gaara. He just wanted to kill Chouji for eating his sandwich, which was partially his mother.
Chouji : Walks up to Naruto Hi, Naruto. As you friend, I just wanted to say that I'm very proud of you and you decisions!
Naruto: ….who are you?
The next day, they decided to be losers and have their honeymoon at Konoha Village. Sasuke started calling Rock Lee.
Sasuke: HII! DO YOU WANT TO COME OVER FOR TEA?
Rock Lee: Uh…I'm kinda busy doin- KONOHA SENPUU- -Hinata screams-
Rock Lee: Ok, sure I'll come over.
Sasuke: Naruto, darling, we have to prepare the tables cause my dear friend Rock Lee is coming over.
Naruto: Well, I'm going to invite Queen Latifah.
Sasuke: Why?
Naruto: Well, she's black. She's going to make the party fun with guns!
Sasuke: No Queen Latifah. Only Rock Lee and maybe that gorgeous Shikamaru.
Naruto: Ok then…
After Rock Lee and Shikamaru left, they were scarred for life and were probably already dead inside.
Sasuke: Naruto, I think it's time.
Naruto: Time for us to what?
Sasuke: Shy Time to have sex.
Naruto: Don't you think it's a bit early? I mean Orochimaru could have AIDS.
Sasuke: No, don't worry, it's ok. I gave all my AIDS to Uchiha Itachi when I used my "GIVING AID NINJUSU"
-Meanwhile somewhere in Akatsuki-
Kisame: Bad news, guys. Looks like Itachi's dead. Seems as if he's gotten AIDS…. Sasori: …
Sasori said nothing.
Kisame: I didn't want him to die. He was my brother!
Deidara: Your brother was a blowfish.
Kisame: Shut up.
-Back in Konoha-
Sakura was peeking through the window, and practically saw porn. Jiraiya popped in.
Jiraiya: Wow, this is GREAT information for my next book!
Sakura: Perv.
Sakura: Man, this is like another episode of Reboot! I'm going in there!
While she struggled to get through the window, she heard a baby's cry.
Sasuke: Oh, Naruto! We made our first ba-
Sakura punched Sasuke with all the chakra focused in her fist. The jutsu faded and it turned out to be Orochimaru behind the mask.
Naruto: But, why?!
Orochimaru: My plan worked halfway at least. I made you poop out the Kyuubi inside you! I was going to eat it but now Tsunade has caught me. And I would have gotten away with it if it weren't for you stupid ninjas and your meddling Sakura!
Sakura: Believe it!
Tsunade: Shut up, Orochimaru. We're taking you to REHAB!
PWNT.