Time to Face the Truth
Thursday
"Hey Zoe!"
"George!" Zoe exclaimed surprised. She had been occupied with the new edition of her favourite medical journal and hadn't noticed him until she almost collided with his chest. "How are you?" she asked rather flustered.
"Shouldn't I be the one asking you that?" he asked gently, looking concerned at her. "I mean you are the one who just lost someone close to you."
For a moment Zoe was puzzled what he was talking about. "Oh, yeah, right! I'm fine though!" she said, feeling a little guilty that she hadn't remembered right away. "And just for the record, we weren't that close. Actually, I hardly knew her," she pointed out.
"Still, losing such a close family member must have been hard for you," George insisted.
"I guess so …," Zoe trailed off. Of course she was sorry that her aunt Maureen had died so suddenly, she truly was, and now she regretted that she hadn't tried harder to get to know her, after all she had been Harley's sister and therefore Zoe's closest living relative of his side of her family, but she simply couldn't muster up the sad feeling people were expecting her to have.
"Listen Zoe, I don't want to be tactless or anything, but we should talk about her will soon," George informed her. "As soon as you are up to it of course."
"Right, the will," Zoe said, feeling even guiltier now. "Like I said, I'm okay. We can talk about it any time. Just give me an appointment."
"Well, I thought maybe we could talk about it over dinner?" George suggested sheepishly. "Tomorrow night?"
"Dinner?" Zoe asked taken aback. "Uh, yeah, sure."
"Great!" George smiled. "How about I'll pick you up at 7 pm?"
"That's fine with me," Zoe smiled back, but then she frowned. "Are you sure Tansy is okay with that?"
"Of course, why wouldn't she?"
Zoe blinked in confusion. She certainly wouldn't have been okay if Wade had gone out for dinner with another woman, at least not without being asked first and giving her permission. And last time she saw Tansy, Zoe didn't have the impression that she would want her to spend time alone with George at all.
"I mean it's not like we are going on a date or something," George explained himself. "It's more like a … business dinner, between friends."
"Right, friends!" Zoe agreed with a small smile. "That's what we are. Well, I guess I'll see you around then, pal!" she added before she left him to get to work.
For a moment George beamed after her. Then he turned around and made his way to his office too.
Friday
So far it had been rather quiet for a Friday afternoon, but at least that gave Wade time to catch up on a few things he kept neglecting whenever the Rammer Jammer was busy.
Wade looked up form his task when he heard someone entering the bar. A young couple that he had never seen before came towards him. "Hello, welcome to the Rammer Jammer," he greeted them enthusiastically. "What can I do for you?"
"Thanks, our car broke down just outside town," the man replied. "Could you please direct us to the next car repair shop?"
"Sure, it is just around the corner actually, on the left hand side. You can't miss it," Wade said and also pointed the rough direction out for them. "But it's most likely closed for the day already."
"Oh no!" The man's face fell and he looked a little desperate now. "What do we do now?" he asked the woman next to him.
"I could give them a call if you like and convince them to make an exception for you," Wade offered, knowing very well that the shop didn't have regular working hours anyway and only opened up if necessary.
"That would be great, thank you so much," the man said relieved and rather grateful.
"No problem," Wade smirked. "I'm glad to be of help."
"I'm Jeff, by the way," the man introduced himself. "And this is my wife Ellen."
"Pleasure to meet you, I'm Wade," Wade said, accepting Jeff's hand in greeting.
As Wade made the call, Jeff turned to his wife. "Honey, why don't you wait here while I'll get our car fixed? Get yourself something to drink and I'll join you here later again for dinner."
"Sounds like a plan to me," she smiled and kissed him goodbye.
Wade watched them with a mix of amusement and jealousy because of their obvious affection for each other. No! He scolded himself almost immediately. He would not think of Zoe right now and how much he missed her.
"What can I get you?" Wade asked Ellen after Jeff had left.
"Red wine, please!"
Wade groaned inwardly, why did she have to remind him even more of what he was missing?
To keep his mind off of this particular and rather touchy subject, Wade decided to engage Ellen into small talk instead. "So what brings you here to Bluebell, besides a broken down car of course?" he asked.
"Oh we are just passing through. My husband and I decided to go on a road trip for our honeymoon," Ellen said, showing him proudly the wedding ring.
Wade gave her a forced smile. He knew what was coming next and already regretted starting a conversation with her. He had the ominous feeling that he was the very first person she was talking to since her wedding, besides her husband obviously, and that she probably was dying to share her happiness with someone else. And unfortunately this time that (un)lucky someone was him.
xxx
Zoe had bought a new dress for the dinner later and she was sure he would love seeing her in it. Well, at least he used to love it when she was wearing these kinds of dresses.
But then again, he most likely wouldn't even notice her wearing it tonight. Unless she would go to the Rammer Jammer after dinner to remind him exactly what he let go so easily.
For a moment Zoe tried to picture Wade's face when he saw her walking into the bar. His face full of awe like it used to be so often and which always had made her feel so special.
Angrily Zoe brushed the tears that dared running down her cheeks away and pushed the thought of Wade and the feelings that came along with it out of her mind. After all she was meeting George in about half an hour and they would spend a perfect evening together with many highly interesting conversations and a lot of smiling and happiness. She really should be beaming of joy right now and not crying over some stupid bartender that didn't even deserve that she was thinking of him.
x
George picked her up at 7 o'clock sharp. He complimented her on her outfit and even opened the car door for her. In other words, it was the perfect beginning to a perfect evening!
After a short ride they came to a halt in front of Fancie's and got out of the car again. It was a wonderful and warm day and above them was a clear sky that soon would be full of blinking stars. The perfect setting for a perfect evening!
When they approached the restaurant, Zoe noticed that it was much too quiet and the usual buzz of soft music and talking people surrounding it was missing. Perplexed she turned her attention away from George and then also observed that there were no lights on. The restaurant was sitting dark, quiet and somehow unwelcoming in front of them.
"What the …?" George had noticed it too now and already sprinted up the staircase toward the entrance. Zoe followed suit.
"I can't believe it," George exclaimed incredulous and pointed at the sign pinned onto the door. "Why does that have to happen today?"
CLOSED FOR RENOVATION
Not so perfect at all.
"Well, that wasn't how I envisioned it," George said disappointed. "I guess we could still drive to Mobile and have dinner there, unless you'd be okay if we simply go over to the Rammer Jammer."
"The Rammer Jammer is fine," Zoe agreed quickly, smiling. She was pretty sure that Wade was working today which meant the perfect opportunity to show him that she had moved on and could have fun without him.
xxx
To Zoe's profound disappointment, Wade didn't even notice her when they entered the Rammer Jammer a bit later. He was much too busy chatting up a young and most certainly great looking girl in front of him.
'Why the hell did she agree to come here?' Zoe thought rather hurt and somewhat embarrassed. Wade clearly had forgotten her already and moved on, or rather went back to his old ways.
Zoe was so taken aback by this realisation that she forgot all about her dinner with George and only remembered him when he put his hand on her back to guide her towards an empty table in middle of the room, right in sight of Wade. Alarmed Zoe stopped him. "Not here! I like it better in the back. It's much cosier there."
x
Ellen kept talking enthusiastically of her perfect wedding just the day before, and what she and her husband had planned to do during their honeymoon. Usually Wade found this kind of conversation rather annoying, but somehow this girl made even the most boring event sound funny, or at least interesting enough to keep him entertained, and he couldn't help giving her a genuine smile for that.
After a while Jeff returned and joined them in their conversation. He was just as funny as Ellen and Wade had such a good time talking to them that he actually was able to put Zoe completely out of his mind for the first time in a long while.
x
Stupid Wade, because of him, Zoe had missed the ending of the funny story George was just telling her.
"What's wrong?" George asked, scrutinising her.
"Nothing!" Zoe said unconvincingly.
"You seem distracted." George turned around to find out what had captured Zoe's attention. "Oh! Please don't tell me you are still hung up on him, Zoe!" he pleaded.
"I'm not! I couldn't care less about him," Zoe replied quickly, but didn't dare looking George directly into the eyes. "Wade Kinsella means nothing to me anymore."
"Good! Because you deserve better than him. Just remember how he treated you. He isn't worth it to be mourned after."
Zoe nodded in agreement, glancing over at Wade out of the corner of her eyes once again. George was right of course, Wade didn't deserve her attention anymore. Zoe knew that already, but unfortunately that was easier said than done.
Zoe smiled at George thankfully and forced herself to turn her focus back to their dinner and conversation.
x
Their car was fixed at around 9 o'clock and Jeff and Ellen decided to hit the road again. Wade saw them off. "All right you two, drive safe! And if you ever happen to be in the vicinity again don't hesitate to drop by."
When he returned to the bar, he suddenly stopped in his tracks. There she was, with him.
'When the hell did they arrive?' Wade wondered annoyed. They were sitting in a corner near the back, smiling and talking. A jolt of pain went straight through his heart at the sight of them, looking all cosy and happy together.
How could he have been so stupid to get distracted so much that he didn't even notice them creeping up on him? He had been on his guard ever since he screwed things up with Zoe, expecting her to turn to George immediately. When it didn't happen, Wade actually thought that George might have been honest with him when he assured him that his intentions with Tansy were sincere.
But now there they were and it sucked all the happiness he had felt the last couple of hours out of him. Crestfallen Wade returned back to his customers waiting in front of the bar.
x
She was bored. Of course she would never admit it to anyone, but this evening with George turned out to be a disaster. Not only couldn't she get Wade out of her head although she tried very hard, but she also had discovered that she had no idea what to talk about with George anymore. Two and a half hours into their 'date' and they were out of topics, and that included the talk about her aunt's will.
George was back to talking about his favourite places in New York now, but this time Zoe only reluctantly joined in. She knew all his favourite places by heart already. No need to go through them all over again. She stifled a yawn and let her gaze wonder back into direction of the bar. She had managed to not do that for over half an hour now, which she was rather proud of, but now she allowed herself to give in for a moment. Relieved Zoe noticed that he wasn't flirting with the girl anymore, but was busy preparing something behind the bar.
"What was your favourite place to go to early in the morning?" George asked her and rudely interrupted Zoe's train of thoughts.
"I don't know, I've always been in the hospital or fast asleep early in the morning," Zoe replied almost automatically, quite sure she had told him that already once or even twice.
x
Wade didn't know with whom he should be angrier, with Zoe for torturing him like that, or George who went on a date although he still was supposed to be with Tansy.
Distracted he viciously hacked the lemons in front of him into much too small pieces to still use them for drinks and such. Stupid Zoe, stupid George, and stupid feelings that simply didn't want to go away. He risked another glance at them and instantly wished he hadn't done it when he felt the pain in his hand as he missed the lemons and cut his thumb instead.
"Crap!" Wade cursed and quickly pressed a towel onto the cut. It seemed to be quite deep and was bleeding profusely. Now even angrier at Zoe and George for distracting him like that, Wade left the bar to get some bandages from the first-aid-box in the storage room.
x
Where was he? Zoe searched the Rammer Jammer with her eyes, but there was no sign of Wade anywhere, and the good-looking woman he was talking to earlier had disappeared also. Maybe he was only checking up the other side of the Rammer Jammer, near the restrooms, Zoe hoped.
"Zoe," George said nervously and took a deep breath. "I want to be honest with you. I didn't just ask you to have dinner with me today to talk about your aunt's will. You see, I was thinking a lot lately, about you … uhm us actually …"
"That's great," Zoe said preoccupied. Wade still hasn't come back yet, and people at the bar were becoming impatient, and so was she.
"Zoe? Did you hear what I've just said?" George asked.
"Hmm, what? Oh, yeah of course, I heard you," Zoe affirmed. "If you'll excuse me for a moment, I need to use the restroom," she suddenly decided and sprang to her feet. George looked after her totally baffled not understanding what had happened just now.
Zoe reached the restrooms, but couldn't find Wade there either. She couldn't believe he would leave his work just like that to make out with some random girl, or even worse than that. Okay, maybe she could, in fact after what he did to her it wasn't such a big surprise, but that didn't change the renewed disappointment in him and the nauseating feeling she had while thinking about what he and the girl were most likely doing right now.
x
"Damn it!" Wade cursed again, pressing another towel onto the cut. The first one was already too bloody to use any longer and he also didn't think it had been that clean to begin with. Wade knew he probably should get stitches, but Brick was out of town for the weekend and there was no way he would go to Zoe.
Eventually the bleeding had stopped so far that he could put a bandage on. It still hurt a lot though and he was sure it would start bleeding more profusely again if he kept on working with this thumb.
Sighing, he pulled out his phone and called Wanda. "Hey Wanda, it's Wade. Do you think you could fill in for me for the rest of the night? Something urgent came up that I have to take care of."
For a moment there was silence at the end of the phone. "Fine, I'll do it." Wanda eventually agreed. "But this is the last time, you hear me Wade Kinsella?"
"Thanks, I'll make it up to you, I promise." Wade thanked her relieved.
"You better do!"
x
When Zoe returned to the table, George was just accepting a phone call. "Hey Tansy, I'm sorry, I can't talk right now, I'm still with my client."
"She doesn't know you are having dinner with me, does she?" Zoe realised, startling George, who hadn't noticed her coming back.
"Well, not exactly," George admitted sheepishly.
"I see …" Zoe said, feeling rather stupid now.
"I just didn't want to upset her," George explained. "Ever since my mother intervened in our relationship, everything revolving you is a touchy subject with Tansy."
"No need to explain George, I get it. You didn't want to risk her leaving you as long as you weren't sure if something more than friendship could happen between us." Zoe assessed calmly.
"That's not what I was doing," George protested.
"Really George? Because I think that is exactly what you were doing." She didn't want to hear some lame excuses right now. In fact, she was even glad that she could cut their 'date' short now. All she wanted to do right now was getting home and be alone for the rest of the weekend.
"Zoe, I …"
"Goodbye George!" Zoe interrupted him disenchanted, threw some money on the table to pay for her share of the dinner and quickly left the Rammer Jammer.
x
How could she have been so dumb? George had been flirting with her the whole time already although he still was with Tansy. Why hadn't she seen it like this before? Well, she knew exactly why. She had been selfish and only wanted to see what was convenient to her.
Zoe groaned miserably, she needed some time to think now. Luckily tomorrow was Saturday and even if Brick was out of town for the weekend, Zoe had decided to only be on call and to only leave the house if someone had a real emergency, like a life and death issue, so she should have enough time think about George, Wade, and the complete disaster that was her life right now. And then she desperately needed to talk to Lavon.
Sunday
"Sixteen hours, Lavon! Can you believe it?" Zoe cried out when she stormed into the kitchen late in the afternoon. "That baby needed sixteen hours to be delivered. I'm so tired I could fall asleep standing up."
Wordlessly Lavon pushed a plate of freshly baked cookies and a huge cup of coffee towards her.
"Thanks!" Zoe said and grabbed a cookie.
"So, you want to talk about the other thing that was bothering yesterday before you were called away?" Lavon asked as he watched Zoe lost in thoughts nibbling on her cookie.
"No, but I have to," she sighed sadly. "Because my life is a complete mess right now and you are the only one I can talk to about it."
"Lucky me," Lavon grimaced.
x
"… and that's when I left him," Zoe finished her story much to Lavon's relief because he didn't think he would have been able to endure any more of Zoe's drama right now.
"Do you think I should tell Tansy?" Zoe asked him indecisive.
"I don't know, Zoe, maybe you should keep out of it," Lavon suggested uncomfortable. "It really isn't your business."
"Technically it is," Zoe protested. "George was kind of cheating on Tansy with another woman and I happen to be this other woman. And as I also know how it is to be cheated on, it quasi is my obligation to tell her."
"Zoe, I think you already did all you could. You called George out on what he was doing and you didn't get involved with him. Everything else that happens between George and Tansy now shouldn't be any of your concern."
"But that's my point, Lavon, Tansy doesn't know about this, she probably still thinks that George is a great guy like everyone else in this town does, when in reality he isn't any better than …" She paused a moment to find a suitable comparison. "Wade. Who says he won't do it again? I mean he already did the same thing when he still was engaged to Lemon."
"That was different, Lemon cheated on George first, remember?" Lavon pointed out.
"Yes, but George didn't know about that when he started flirting with me," Zoe suddenly realised. "Holy cow, Lavon, he actually is a serial deceiver, which is even worse than what Wade did. At least with Wade I knew what I was in for. I mean I always kind of suspected something like this could happen one day. That doesn't mean that it hurt less, but with George I had no idea, or at least I didn't want to see it until now. How could I have been so stupid, Lavon?"
"You weren't stupid, Big Z," Lavon soothed her. "Just … blindfolded."
Zoe smiled at him sadly. "I'm going to bed now, I can't think straight anymore," she whined and got up from her seat."
"Zoe!" Lavon hold her back. "Before you go to bed, I'd really appreciate it if you to do me a little favour."
"Sure, what can I do for you?"
"Would you mind checking up on Wade?" Lavon asked, sounding a little nervous.
"What? No! Definitely not, there is no way I'm going over to Wade to check on him!" Zoe protested vehemently. But couldn't resist asking. "Why should I do that anyway?"
"He wanted to fix the lighting in my office today, but I haven't seen him the whole day, and to be honest, I didn't like the look of him yesterday evening, so …"
"Is that why you want me to check on him? Because you don't like the look of him? Well it so happens, Lavon, that I can't stand the look of him either!" Zoe interrupted him rudely.
"No, I mean he looked kind of sick," Lavon clarified, sounding a little concerned now. "And … I don't know … maybe this cut on his hand had something to do with it."
"Cut? What cut?" Zoe asked curious.
"Wade cut his thumb on Friday while working at the Rammer Jammer," Lavon explained. "He said it wasn't a big deal and that he would let Brick check it out tomorrow if it isn't already healed by then, but … I don't know Zoe, it was still bleeding pretty badly yesterday and like I said, I didn't think Wade looked so well either."
"Why the hell didn't you tell me that earlier?" Zoe reproached him appalled, now worried too.
"I guess it slipped my mind. And it's not like Wade isn't capable of taking care of himself. So I figured he would do something about the wound if it was serious. But now I'm not so sure anymore. I have to admit I'm a little worried that it was worse than he told me. So would you please check up on him?"
Zoe shook her head in disbelief. "If that stupid idiot died of toxemia only a few feet away from me, his doctor, I swear I will kill him, and never ever talk to you again, Lavon!" she cried out in exasperation, and was already out of the door before Lavon could thank her.
xxx
Zoe had run the whole way, but now she hesitated in front of his door, too nervous to knock, let alone go inside and actually face him. She didn't want him to think that she still cared about him. But in the end her concerns for his wellbeing won over and she knocked anyway.
It felt like an eternity until his shadow finally appeared on the other side of the door and Zoe's heart started pounding rapidly out of nervousness. Slowly the door opened and Wade's face became visible in the crack of the door.
"Zoe?" he frowned astounded, leaning against the door frame.
Zoe stared at him for a moment, unsure what to do next. "Uhm, … hey Wade!" she croaked, and hastily cleared her throat. "Lavon sent me over to have a look at the cut on your hand."
"Oh, uh, thanks, but you don't have to do that, it's fine," Wade quickly brushed her off.
"Are you sure?" Zoe asked while scrutinising him. He did look unusually pale and kind of sweaty too. He also had dark circles under his eyes as if he hadn't had much sleep lately.
"Yeah, it was only a small cut, no big deal," Wade assured her.
"Look Wade, I promised Lavon that I would check up on you, so why don't you let me have a quick look at the cut, so that I can tell him that everything is fine and he can stop worrying?" Zoe requested.
"I told you, Doc, it was hardly more than a scratch. You probably won't even notice it anymore," Wade denied her request. "But I can give Lavon a call if you want, and tell him that you kept your promise and that I'm fine. All right?"
Zoe was sure now that he was hiding something. "All right," she agreed anyway. She was still surveying him suspiciously though, trying to get a look at the hand in question, but he conveniently hid it somewhere behind the still half closed door and his body. "I think I'll go then," she said, pointing towards her own house.
"All right," Wade repeated, sounding relieved. "But thanks for stopping by."
Zoe nodded and turned away, making it look like she was leaving. But as soon as she heard the door closing behind her, she dashed back and peered through one of the windows.
Strangely, the room seemed to be empty and Zoe already pictured Wade lying passed out behind his sofa, where she couldn't see him, but then she noticed a movement out of the corner of her eye and spotted him at last. Wade was leaning against the door, holding his heavily bandaged hand close to his chest. His eyes were tightly shut and his face was contorted with obvious pain.
"WADE KINSELLA, YOU BIG OAF, OPEN UP THIS DOOR!" Zoe yelled, hammering with her fists onto the door to emphasise her demand. "NOW!"
Wade groaned in exasperation, why couldn't she just let it go and leave him alone? Taking a deep breath he turned around and obediently opened the door for her.
Without further ado, Zoe pushed inside and shoved Wade onto his sofa. She threw him a dark look before she grabbed his bandaged hand to examine it. Wade winced in pain as she removed layer after layer, but didn't dare to complain out loud, partly because he was too stubborn to give her that satisfaction and partly out of fear that she would become even more hostile if he did.
"WADE!" Zoe exclaimed in horror as she got the last bit of the bandage off and revealed the heavily swollen thumb beneath it. The cut was pretty deep and pus mixed with blood was oozing out of the infected wound. And the smell was rather nauseating too.
"Don't move!" she ordered sternly. "I'll get my kit."
She must have run the whole way because she was only gone for a couple of minutes, which hardly gave Wade enough time to take another deep breath and brace himself for what was coming next.
Zoe gave him an anesthetic injection and started to closer examine the cut and then subsequently started to clean it.
Every so often he risked a glance at her. Her face was screwed up in concentration as she cleaned up his wound. He longed to reach out with his other hand and touch her, but of course he didn't do it and simply enjoyed her closeness.
"You are lucky that you didn't hurt any nerves or sinews," Zoe berated him. "And thankfully I already gave you a tetanus injection the last time you cut yourself so at least we don't have to worry about that as well on top of everything else."
Wade nodded but kept quiet and let her continue scolding him at her leisure. It was better this way as he probably deserved it anyway, and he also kind of enjoyed it a little bit.
"Why didn't you get treatment right away?" she asked him reproachful as she put a new bandage on.
"I couldn't. Brick is out of town for the weekend in case you haven't noticed. Which means I had to wait for his return, hadn't I?" Wade stated the obvious.
"Why would you want to wait for Brick?" Zoe angrily demanded to know. "I'm your doctor!"
Wade briefly looked up at her and gave her a small smile that she didn't notice. "I wasn't so sure about that anymore. I thought you'd rather if I see Brick from now on," he explained.
"Well, you thought wrong!" Zoe snapped and they both fell quiet for a moment.
"Why do you hate me so much?" Zoe suddenly asked after she had finished bandaging him.
Wade stared at her taken aback. "I don't hate you!" he insisted, horrified that she would even think something like that.
"Do you want me to leave town, is that it?" she asked angrily.
"What? No!" What the hell was she talking about?" Wade was sure he had missed something as she didn't make any sense to him right now.
"Then what did I do that was so horrible that you not only cheated on me, but now want me to lose one of my patients as well?" Zoe wanted to know, trying very hard to not start crying in front of him.
"Zoe, I …"
"Because although I saved the people of Bluebell from a flu epidemic, I still have a hard time getting enough patients to bring in my thirty percent this quarter, which means every patient counts, even you," Zoe explained hotly, still successfully keeping the tears away.
For a moment Wade looked at her rather hurt, but then quickly turned his gaze toward his bandaged thumb to avoid eye contact with her. "I didn't cheat on you!" he whispered almost inaudible.
"What?" Zoe asked perplexed, sure that she hadn't heard him correctly.
Wade forced himself to look her directly into the eyes now. "I said I didn't cheat on you, Zoe!" he repeated loud and clearly.
I hope you liked my story so far! Please review and tell me what you think. ;)